My husband is retired military so I know a little of what you are going thru. It is difficult not knowing what is going on with your husband and how you can help. If I might suggest - if you live near a military base check to see what they offer for the spouses. When my husband was deployed the nearby military base had support groups for the spouses and in some cases the spouses formed their own groups. They offered baby-sitting when needed, someone to talk to in times of stress and just all around support. The spouses of military members who had been deployed before were especially helpful in that they'd been thru it and kindda knew the drill. It's not much but I hope this helps a little.

Sue