I like the idea of checking with your brother to see what you might be able to do to be more involved. If he clearly states that they are all set (without you), then I would just go with the general consensus here, and let it go. Trust me - having been on both sides (being part of the wedding party, an d being merely a "guest"), I'd go for being a guest any day! Less expense, less 'following the rules,' less responsibility, more FUN! Enjoy it!

And remember that when your wedding comes along, it can be all yours to plan - you can (nicely) remind anyone who tries to interject their ideas on your day that you've been waiting for the day when you could do things YOUR way. And make sure you do!

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"The errors of faith are better than the best thoughts of unbelief." - Thomas Russell