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Originally Posted by cougarskies  'Confront' the mom? I think that's a very strong word in regards to an act of kindness! Whether your child asked or it was offered, the woman gave your child a nice gift. Either way, she hasn't done anything wrong. I can't imagine why you feel miffed, annoyed, and undermined but I think you're really overeacting. Regardless of what prompted her kindness, it was a kindness and there's no reason to blame her for her generosity. ???
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I don't know if my definition of "confront" is the same as yours...confront, to me, means to bring up an awkward subject (which money can be). Maybe I should have said "address the situation with her."
There was no "overraction," because all I did was post on a message board for opinions, talk to my daughter about spending and other people's money, and had DD write the mom a nice thank you note, which she was happy to do.
I'm glad to have gotten the input I did here, because it made me decide that addressing the mom with my concerns with this particular incident was not in order. And, like I said, I'm sort of glad it even happened. For us, lesson learned, and all's well that ends well...