When I get that kind of headache, only Advil Cold and Sinus helps. But follow xpcandy's advice first and make sure it's not carbon monoxide.

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If this is going to be a Christian nation that doesn't help the poor, either we have to pretend that Jesus was just as selfish as we are, or we've got to acknowledge that He commanded us to love the poor and serve the needy without condition, and then admit that we just don't want to do it.

- Stephen Colbert.