There is certainly SOMETHING about Mary!
Posted 03-18-2007 at 07:37 AM by mycoupons
Editor's note: I hosted a St. Patrick's Day party at my home tonight (I am penning this article on Saturday night.) Although I may get fired for admitting this, I imbimbed a teeny bit of alcohol at the party. Yep, I am drunk on the job. I am also in my pajama's... but shhhh..don't tell my boss. Anyway, I will use spell and grammar check, but ask for your forgiveness if this comes across as a drunk girl writing. Thanks!
:Fru-Gal {Froo-guhl}- Adjective.Economical in use or expenditure; prudently saving or sparing; not wasteful. My friend, Mary.Mary was a guest at my party tonight. The talk turned to coupons and saving money. My friends can be divided into three categories.1. Coupon-a-holic money saving freak-o's (Like me.)2. Spend crazy, pay extra on purpose show-offs.3. Mary.Yep. She is in a category of her own. She claims she's frugal. Let's call a duck a duck- she is CHEAP. As in CHEEP. As in a baby birds first word. CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP. When everyone arrived, I had out a tray of appetizers. Salmon and cream cheese on baguette slices with capers. (How Rachel Ray am I??) Mary said they were delicious and wanted to make them for HER party next week. She asked how much salmon is. I told her the package cost me $2.99. Then I told her it was a three ounce package. She seemed shocked to say the least. She said she would have to make a different appetizer as she was not spending that kind of money on FISH!The coversation then turned to the cheap things people do. Mary let loose some doozies!She has not purchased salad dressing since 2001! No Sir! She just collects ketchup and mayo packets from fast food places and makes her own- AT HOME!Mary does not order a beverage in restaurants. She orders water with lemon. Lots of lemon. Then she adds sugar packets. I called it ' Ghetto lemonade.'Speaking of restaurants, Mary will only go out forlunch, never dinner and if she wants fast food, she goes through the the drive-thru and orders a kid's meal. You know when a bar of soap is on it's last leg and you are left with a sliver? Well, my favorite shower past time is mushing that sliver down the drain. While the water is running, I use my foot to smush the sliver down into the holes of the drain. Mary is not a fan of smush the soap. She saves them all. Then she melts them down into a NEW BAR OF SOAP. My favorite Mary'ism' is envelopes and stamps. She purchases neither. As for envelopes, she has aquired quite the collection of return envelopes that come with bills and such. She just tapes a blank piece of scrap paper over the pre-printed address and hand writes the address for her letter.The only time she encountered an issue was when her electric bill was late. After some investigating, it turned out that the envelope she used had a barcode on it, directing it to the phone company. So she sent her electric bill to the phone company. That didn't stop her. A magic marker through the barcode solved her problem!As for stamps, no need to buy them according to Mary. She just makes the To and From the same (The address of the intended recipient.) and omits the postage. When the USPS realizes this error, the simply return the letter to the sender- the original addresse!I think I will turn her in. I need some excitement in my life. When we sat down to eat, my husband took the opportunity to refresh everyone's drink. He handed Mary a glass of tap water, a whole lemon, and a five pound bag of sugar. I spit my merlot across the table!Hey, I may be frugal, but I am NOT cheap. Until we meet again,
CiciCici@MyCoupons.com
:Fru-Gal {Froo-guhl}- Adjective.Economical in use or expenditure; prudently saving or sparing; not wasteful. My friend, Mary.Mary was a guest at my party tonight. The talk turned to coupons and saving money. My friends can be divided into three categories.1. Coupon-a-holic money saving freak-o's (Like me.)2. Spend crazy, pay extra on purpose show-offs.3. Mary.Yep. She is in a category of her own. She claims she's frugal. Let's call a duck a duck- she is CHEAP. As in CHEEP. As in a baby birds first word. CHEEP CHEEP CHEEP. When everyone arrived, I had out a tray of appetizers. Salmon and cream cheese on baguette slices with capers. (How Rachel Ray am I??) Mary said they were delicious and wanted to make them for HER party next week. She asked how much salmon is. I told her the package cost me $2.99. Then I told her it was a three ounce package. She seemed shocked to say the least. She said she would have to make a different appetizer as she was not spending that kind of money on FISH!The coversation then turned to the cheap things people do. Mary let loose some doozies!She has not purchased salad dressing since 2001! No Sir! She just collects ketchup and mayo packets from fast food places and makes her own- AT HOME!Mary does not order a beverage in restaurants. She orders water with lemon. Lots of lemon. Then she adds sugar packets. I called it ' Ghetto lemonade.'Speaking of restaurants, Mary will only go out forlunch, never dinner and if she wants fast food, she goes through the the drive-thru and orders a kid's meal. You know when a bar of soap is on it's last leg and you are left with a sliver? Well, my favorite shower past time is mushing that sliver down the drain. While the water is running, I use my foot to smush the sliver down into the holes of the drain. Mary is not a fan of smush the soap. She saves them all. Then she melts them down into a NEW BAR OF SOAP. My favorite Mary'ism' is envelopes and stamps. She purchases neither. As for envelopes, she has aquired quite the collection of return envelopes that come with bills and such. She just tapes a blank piece of scrap paper over the pre-printed address and hand writes the address for her letter.The only time she encountered an issue was when her electric bill was late. After some investigating, it turned out that the envelope she used had a barcode on it, directing it to the phone company. So she sent her electric bill to the phone company. That didn't stop her. A magic marker through the barcode solved her problem!As for stamps, no need to buy them according to Mary. She just makes the To and From the same (The address of the intended recipient.) and omits the postage. When the USPS realizes this error, the simply return the letter to the sender- the original addresse!I think I will turn her in. I need some excitement in my life. When we sat down to eat, my husband took the opportunity to refresh everyone's drink. He handed Mary a glass of tap water, a whole lemon, and a five pound bag of sugar. I spit my merlot across the table!Hey, I may be frugal, but I am NOT cheap. Until we meet again,
CiciCici@MyCoupons.com
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