How would you like your eggs?
Posted 03-27-2007 at 07:11 AM by mycoupons
If you were being sent to deserted island and could only take one item and one person- I suggest you take 1000 eggs and me.
My skin is so greasy, that you could literally fry an egg on it. GROSS!!
I saw my dermatologist last week. I again complained about my oily skin.
I have tried no less than fifteen soaps, lotions, and creams.
No matter what I did, my skin always looked like I had slathered on olive oil.
After hearing my rant, my dermatologist asked which I wanted first, the good news or the bad news.
I never know how to answer this question! I mean, if I take the good news first, no matter how elated I am, I will still be feeling queasy, because I know the bad news is just around the corner.
On the other hand, if I take the bad news first, I'll be so pre-occupied with the horror I just heard that I will not get to relish in the good news to follow.
I opted for the bad news first.
"There is really not much more you can do."
Ok. So I have been sentenced to life as a grease face. There are worse things, I suppose.
And the good news?
"You won't have wrinkles when you get old!"
Well slap my butt and call me Sally! You mean when I am ninety-six peeing in my pants and calling out to my cat that died three decades earlier, I'll still have the face of a thirty year old? Albeit a greasy one?? Sign me up!
Not exactly good news to me.
I care what my skin looks like now. Will I care what my skin looks like 60 years from now? I doubt it. 60 years from now, the only thing I plan on caring about is whether I wake up every day.
"There is one last thing you can try." Dr. Death told me. "St. Ives apricot scrub."
I started wondering how to book a flight to St. Ives, wherever that was, and how I was going to get their scrubby apricots back through customs.
"You can get it at Wal-Mart." He offered.
Wal-Mart?!?!
I have had prescriptions filled for creams that have removed the top layer of my skin, prescriptions for soap that contained more alcohol than my dorm room refrigerator, and a $200 non-insurance covered prescription for a lotion that I had to wear GLOVES to apply. And he is telling me the holy grail of face cleansers is sold at Wal-Mart???
Off I went. To Wal-Mart (Not St. Ives) I picked up a bottle for less than $5.
I took it home, and was impressed that I didn't have to don protective hazmat gear to apply it. I wet my face with warm water and started scrubbing. The scrub is made from apricot pits, and is very dry and rough. Once I rinsed it off, I did not look greasy.
I went about my next task, and when I checked the mirror ten minutes later, I was still NOT greasy.
An hour later, no oil. For the rest of the day, I remained oil free!
That was last Monday. It has now been a week, and I can honestly say that I am NOT oily. I use the scrub twice a day- morning and night and I look SO much better.
I emailed my dermatologist this morning: (He is a life-long friend of my parents, so I can talk to him like this!)
Dear Dr. Death,
I wanted to thank you and let you know that the St.Ives apricot scrub is working! My face is not oily, and I am so happy to have found this wonder wash! My skin is as dry as a desert, and I love it. Seeing as how I am a 'have my cake and eat it too' kinda girl, I was wondering if I could still retain the right to have no wrinkles when I am old.
P.S. I think it only fair that you take me on the next drug company paid vacation you are treated to. Since I have been your guinea pig for the last ten years, while you used my face to sell expensive prescriptions, I think you owe me this.
Sincerely,
Cici
He replied this evening:
Dear Cici,
How does Barbados in the spring sound? And, sorry to burst your bubble, but you were going to get wrinkles anyway. I was just trying to make you feel better.
Love,
Dr. Death.
I'm going to wash my face!
Until we meet again,
Cici
Cici@MyCoupons.com
My skin is so greasy, that you could literally fry an egg on it. GROSS!!
I saw my dermatologist last week. I again complained about my oily skin.
I have tried no less than fifteen soaps, lotions, and creams.
No matter what I did, my skin always looked like I had slathered on olive oil.
After hearing my rant, my dermatologist asked which I wanted first, the good news or the bad news.
I never know how to answer this question! I mean, if I take the good news first, no matter how elated I am, I will still be feeling queasy, because I know the bad news is just around the corner.
On the other hand, if I take the bad news first, I'll be so pre-occupied with the horror I just heard that I will not get to relish in the good news to follow.
I opted for the bad news first.
"There is really not much more you can do."
Ok. So I have been sentenced to life as a grease face. There are worse things, I suppose.
And the good news?
"You won't have wrinkles when you get old!"
Well slap my butt and call me Sally! You mean when I am ninety-six peeing in my pants and calling out to my cat that died three decades earlier, I'll still have the face of a thirty year old? Albeit a greasy one?? Sign me up!
Not exactly good news to me.
I care what my skin looks like now. Will I care what my skin looks like 60 years from now? I doubt it. 60 years from now, the only thing I plan on caring about is whether I wake up every day.
"There is one last thing you can try." Dr. Death told me. "St. Ives apricot scrub."
I started wondering how to book a flight to St. Ives, wherever that was, and how I was going to get their scrubby apricots back through customs.
"You can get it at Wal-Mart." He offered.
Wal-Mart?!?!
I have had prescriptions filled for creams that have removed the top layer of my skin, prescriptions for soap that contained more alcohol than my dorm room refrigerator, and a $200 non-insurance covered prescription for a lotion that I had to wear GLOVES to apply. And he is telling me the holy grail of face cleansers is sold at Wal-Mart???
Off I went. To Wal-Mart (Not St. Ives) I picked up a bottle for less than $5.
I took it home, and was impressed that I didn't have to don protective hazmat gear to apply it. I wet my face with warm water and started scrubbing. The scrub is made from apricot pits, and is very dry and rough. Once I rinsed it off, I did not look greasy.
I went about my next task, and when I checked the mirror ten minutes later, I was still NOT greasy.
An hour later, no oil. For the rest of the day, I remained oil free!
That was last Monday. It has now been a week, and I can honestly say that I am NOT oily. I use the scrub twice a day- morning and night and I look SO much better.
I emailed my dermatologist this morning: (He is a life-long friend of my parents, so I can talk to him like this!)
Dear Dr. Death,
I wanted to thank you and let you know that the St.Ives apricot scrub is working! My face is not oily, and I am so happy to have found this wonder wash! My skin is as dry as a desert, and I love it. Seeing as how I am a 'have my cake and eat it too' kinda girl, I was wondering if I could still retain the right to have no wrinkles when I am old.
P.S. I think it only fair that you take me on the next drug company paid vacation you are treated to. Since I have been your guinea pig for the last ten years, while you used my face to sell expensive prescriptions, I think you owe me this.
Sincerely,
Cici
He replied this evening:
Dear Cici,
How does Barbados in the spring sound? And, sorry to burst your bubble, but you were going to get wrinkles anyway. I was just trying to make you feel better.
Love,
Dr. Death.
I'm going to wash my face!
Until we meet again,
Cici
Cici@MyCoupons.com
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