My husband's niece lives in TN ... Is 22 and has 2 kids. Recently broke up with her live in boyfriend. Money was extremely tight when they were together and even tighter now. She is going to college full time, but the stress of the last year has her going from 3.7 gpa to failing. She currently gets a college allowance, daycare paid for, WIC and food stamps and her school is paid for. The Ex was in an accident and broke his back for a 2nd time. He had surgery 2 years ago from a back injury and needless to say his job working concrete...is gone. He had been paying an electric bill and not much else.
If we were able to convince her to move down to GA. She coulds live with us and I could watch her girls.... but what about her benefits? HOw could I find out what she could qualify for in GA.
We can help her there short term, but cant commit to long term financial help.

Her mom found her a trailer to live in..more expenses..... "because there was no room for her to move back home" She moved out of
her bedroom.. her and 2 girls could move back in it. WTH?? My mom would have air mattress' on the floor to help me and my kids, we would make it work.

There are 2 major colleges within 40 miles and many local tech colleges and community colleges here too. We have 2 bedrooms that aren't being used.. I am a stay at home mom and would be here for the kids and for emotional support that I think would help her.

TIA Josie

I know this may sound harsh to you but please wait until you are asked. Sorry if this is not the answer you are looking for.

I think that you should make the offer... I would have her contact her case worker in TN and ask her out right what she would recieve in GA.

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Be careful what you wish for.....

Benefits are based on income if she has no income she will still get the same benefits I believe. I would have her ask her worker about it to make sure. It think it's a wonderful offer and I hope she sees the benefit of living with others now so their lives will be better. You are very generous to take them on.

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

It's nice to help your family otoh, either in TN or where you live, couldn't the niece get a job if $$ is short? From what you have said it sounds like everything except housing is already being provided to her for free, through govt programs and welfare...but she still needs $ for housing and probably other things. Can she work?

Is she receiving federal aid or state aid?
WIC and Food Stamps would probably carry over state to state (my WIC did many, many, many years ago when we moved from one state to another).

Is the daycare paid for through a program that requires full time student status or full-time work status or a combination of student and work?

If she is receiving some sort of federal assistance for college, that should be able to be transferred from state to state. If, however, she is receiving state money for college it probably will not transfer.

Finally, where is the father(s) of the children? Was the live-in the father? And if he is totally disabled then he should be receiving some sort of check, and his child support should be coming out of the check. If there are other fathers out there--then they need to cowboy up and pay child support. Having said that, I realize you can't get blood from a turnip, and a man being ordered to pay child support doesn't alway equate to them PAYING it.

Frankly, she may have to look at getting some sort of job, and putting school on the back burner for a while. And while it is nice for you to offer to help? Sometimes we all have to sink or swim on our own. It appears that this young lady has made some unwise decisions in her life to be in the situation she is in. Perhaps, she needs to figure her own way out so that she can learn from mistakes and not repeat them. I don't know--I'm just basing my response to what I read in the OP.

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

As I ramble

Yes she has many poor decisions.. along with her brother and sister. I wish that you had to go to parenting school before you had children. Her older 2 got "sent" to live with Dad when thye were 16. My BIL is far from my favorite person and his parenting choices along with his EX, suck! The kids had no guidance and parental love. Nephew dropped out of school when 16 and dad said it was ok because he was already failing for the year... well 4.5 years later he finally had to get a job.. that was rational to them. Oldest daughter.. had the we dont ask, and she wont LIE mentality of raising her. No consequences, just stay out of her parents hair and not get arrested. R is the youngest of his 3 and we really thought she would be the one to break the trend. She got pg when she was 17, her mom let her move into her boyfrinds garage apt while she finished high school. WONDERFUL MOM. When dd#1 was 6 months old she started college. and was pg again 4 months later. College has been full time and she is allowed to work a part time job. In the evening she would need another sitter and she does not get enough to pay for 2 seperate child care expenses.
We are trying to have her get the "questions" answered as to his disabiltity or SS$ ............ When they were together there was $35 left over a week for groceries not covered by Food stamps and her gas expenses.
We have suggested her coming down before.. and she had the boyfriend... now we are encouraging it again to let her have a fresh start.

I do not know how her funding comes in.

You will need to check your state laws. Trying calling the local DHS and explain the situation. One of my friends daughter is a single mom and I know that if she moves back home she will loose some of her benefits so you need to check. Good luck!

I agree. It is very possible op that you will regret taking them on because you have a different lifestyle than she does. Trying to meld differences is hard.

From what the op has typed, the girl gets a lot financially. A lot ! Maybe her finances are tight, but I see people who always have money for what they want it for. I think right now she needs to be an adult and make some sacrifices. She needs to be responsible for herself and her children.

dl

Have to agree with above poster. As gracious as your offer is (and it is above and beyond), are you prepared for the niece's lifestyle? God bless you for wanting to help the little ones, but the mother may want to run around and hook up with whoever. Sorry, doesn't seem like she had the best mentor with mom and dad. Very sad to see such a young girl with children, and unfortunately, it's the children that pay the price.

Bless you for caring, but I think after awhile, you would be Mom.

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I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!