My step-mother was recently diagnosed with breast cancer and is starting chemo later this week. She has 2 daughters, and lately, I have no idea what they are thinking. The oldest of the two and I were friends on facebook, but she recently deleted me. I came to find out (by seeing her posts on a mutal friends page) that she is turning the entire situation into more than it is. (that is probbaly why she un-friended me) She is telling people that she doesn't know why her mother is even trying chemo treatments when the dr said the prognosis is poor. I saw that and immediately called my dad to ask what happend because we (my brother and I) were told that the treatments should work, as they caught it in time. My dad had no clue, but he said that now all of a sudden, my step-sister is telling her mother that she is finding lumps everywhere, throwing up blood, has no energy etc. But yet after they talked to her husband a few days later, when they called to ask how her dr. appt went he told them she was fine, and nothing was wrong. (apprently she forgot to tell him of her stories, he was clueless )
Then there is her other daughter who is getting married in Aug. They told her that due to the treatments, they are not sure if they will be able to travel to CA for the wedding (she knew about the cancer, the treatments and the possibility of them not being able to attend the wedding because of the treatments when they first got engaged, and were talking about planning an Aug wedding back in June) But she keeps telling them (and everyone else) that they are having a Ca wedding and unless someone is dead there is no reason for anyone to say they can't come. And my dad said all she continuously says , whines and yells is " I want a CA wedding" my dad said he finally had enough and told her she was being a selfish spoiled bi*&^ (and my dad is a very calm person, in fact I can honestly say I don't think I have ever in my life saw him mad) he then told her "You know Maryann would be happy with a Chuck E Cheese wedding, if that was the only place your mother would be able to make it to." (gee thanks dad lol ) but it is true, I would have put the planning on hold till she was done with treatments or when the dr thought she would be alright to travel such a long distance.
I understand that people deal with situations differently, but these two have me sitting here wondering what are they going to do next. Thanks for letting me vent

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~~~~**Maryann**~~~~

I just got a firm grip on reality....
Now I can strangle it

It's all about focusing the attention on her.

When my dad was sick in Feb. and died in Mar. my new SIL loved the attention. It was very bizarre. My sister & her husband and my DH & I have all been married 22 years (my sister set her date 5 weeks ahead of mine - long story)! My brother and SIL have been married only 4. SIL told EVERYONE...repeatedly...about the ticket she got for my brother to come see dad when he was under hospice care (they live in another state).

She made a big deal about having to go shopping for clothes for the visitation and funeral after they got here when he died (while the rest of the family was gathering, planning, etc.)

15 minutes after he took his last breath at 4:09 in the morning, she had it posted on facebook before ANYONE including the rest of the family had been notified. My mom made her take it down.

She is one of the most needy people I have ever met in my life. Everything is always about her. She needs more accolades and pats on the back and "good jobs" than a 5-year-old. It was bizarre to watch her attract attention to herself.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

People are strange... I have a sister like this. She absolutely thrives in situations that the majority of the rest of us struggle with. I don't understand it and am so thankful it's not me..

Maryann - good luck with the family. I can't answer the "why", but I can say you are not alone!

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Kim

I think there is at least one in any family!!

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Melissa

Ex pulled a similar stunt. He called me early one morning, (before kids were up) to tell me his father had died. And would I please tell the boys. I told him that I would tell the boys after I got home from work, I didn't want to potentially send them to school upset. So, my stupid ex posts on Facebook all of 2 min after we hang up. As I'm finishing getting ready for work, and the boys are waiting on me---I hear my youngest say "Hey T, grandpa died according to dad's facebook".

Sadly, because the kids weren't ever close to their grandpa, it didn't really faze them.

People do strange thing...usually can't explain it either!

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

This post bridges two of my recent ones.....responsibility and fb.

This situation is obviously stellar in the fb bit of how people handle themselves, the types of things they choose to post, and unfriending people like it's third grade. And yet to that person, it's all a-ok, and the focus is on them.

The responsibility side is overall how people conduct themselves. A wedding is important, but sometimes life gets in the way.

dl

...Archie Bunker still lives...

MAryann I am dearly sorry your having family problems..I also agree there is one sometimes a few in everyone's family. At this stage in my life, while I dearly love many family members, there others whom if I never see or talk to them , life would be okay. For me personally my mom who was born in Bulgaria and came here when she was 15 came from a big family 7 in all one brother and 6 girls. Now growing up with many cousins and aunts, they were always fighting and they were all tough as nails. At this point they are all deceased only my mom remains . As far as cousins are concerned, when my brother Sonny passed away from aids 5/4/02 , there were plenty of family members who never called, never came to see him, yet they come to his funeral and crying all over the coffin. Some even went to say, they were afraid when he was alive they could come down with aids.. Again Hon hope all works out. Peace. Catherine