We have an 11 yr old DS, who just started health class yesterday, and will have it for the next 6 weeks. I don't know if he will ask us any tough questions as a result of this class but I know at some point in the near future, he will ask us things that I am not quite sure how to answer.

What I'm wondering, specifically, is... What if he asks me or DH if we ever did certain things when we were younger? How should we handle/answer that? Neither one of us were saints, and I'm sure we've both done things that we aren't proud of, and more than likely, would change if we could go back in time and do so.

I don't want to lie to DS, but then again... There are just some things that maybe I'd rather he not know.

I hope I'm making sense? Your advice is really appreciated.

It is SOOOOOOOOOO much easier taking care of kids when they were little!

Suzanne

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Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant, filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like. - Lemony Snicket

Our 14 year old has asked us some questions like that - Matt told him what goes on between 2 adults is private. We'll answer any questions he has and he can always come to us but we also want to teach him the meaning of intimacy.

Good luck, this is the hardest part I think of child rearing. I know I am living in a household of 5 men and the testosterone is so thick I would need a chainsaw to cut through it. LOL

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Catt
~ Mirror Mirror on the wall, I am my mother - after all! ~

Tell him just what you posted here. There were things you and your DH did in your youth that you are not proud of. If he asks for specifics, just give the details you are comfortable with, he'll get the idea. Also let him know that the times were different when you were his age, the world was not as knowledgeable about certain subjects as it is now.

I was a wild child and my daughter (step), who's 19, pretty much knows everything by now. She made some of the same mistakes I "warned" her about but not as many and not the really, really bad ones. She's also thanked me for always telling her the truth, even when it's casted me in a bad light. Those mistakes are a couple of decades old and if she can learn anything from them then I'm glad I was the one who made them.

Good luck!

Just do what my mom did to us.Beat us to the question first.My mom asked me if I knew what sexual intercourse was.I said yes but she preceeded to tell me anyway. No questions from me after that detailed explanation,lol.I think its important to trust your kids 100% with this subject.My parents always trusted me and I never let them down because they trusted me.

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I only tell my daughter what I think she "needs" to know, and she is comfortable enough to come talk to me because we talk about alot of things. You have to be honest but there isn't a need to go into a full blown detailed discussion. I also bought my daughter a book that talks about growing up and develping and then asked her if she had any questions.

Since you have a son I would instruct his father to tell him the truth about respecting women and himself and just because other boys or guys are talking about it doesn't necessarily mean that is the true what they are telling him and he needs to talk to his father and get advice from him and that the both of you want him to be responsible and to think things through. What will you gain? What will you lose? What will you regret? What will you be glad you achieved? What can you do to become a responsible young man? What are some ways to show respect to women? What are the ways you can respect yourself?

I guess there are just a few questions to ask him and then discuss the answers. Let him know it is definitely okay to come and talk to you guys about anything no matter how bad he thinks it may be or embarrassing.

[quote=Mattncatt]Our 14 year old has asked us some questions like that - Matt told him what goes on between 2 adults is private. We'll answer any questions he has and he can always come to us but we also want to teach him the meaning of intimacy.

What a great answer.

My oldest just turned 10, a girl. I totally agree it was SO much easier when they were little. So far we have just given her the info she needs...about the changes in her body. She isn't much of a girly-girl so she has no interest in boys at this point. When she does, we'll continue to fill her in!!