Is anyone living with a child or family member with autism and want to share some stories???

My youngest is very autistic, non-verbal, and very, very difficult to deal with everyday. But he is so lucky that he has two older brothers and Mom & Dad that love him and a great extended family that adores him . . .

~~~~~Just wondering if anyone deals with Autism . . . Kathy B.

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Mommy to three wonderful boys, Justin (11), Nicholas (9) and Scottie (8)

Hi Kathy ~

Yep, dealing with it here.

My son Matthew is 7. He is dx as autistic and also has mild hypotonia, apraxia and dysarthria. He is in a special ed classroom (Cognitive impairment) but next year we may move him to an Autism Impairment room. Our school district just started up the Autism classrooms about 3 yrs ago.

He can talk a little - mostly single words with horrible articulation. He just received an Augmentative Communication device. In addition to the school therapy he gets 60 min of private speech and 45 minutes of private OT. We also have a Play ABA therapist who comes to the house twice a week. We are just now getting some financial help - we have paid tens of thousands of dollars over the years in therapies insurance will not cover.

It's a different world. I can spot a SN kids from a mile away now. You deal with people who just don't get it. My best friend has a 3 yr old girl just diagnosed and now that she is going through it she says "I should have been more supportive to you". Luckily we have good family support too - they accept him - Matthew is Matthew.

Matthew is pretty well behaved which I am grateful for. He used to have severe sensory issues but those are lessening. He still has lots of repetitive behaviors - will not play with toys properly - would watch the same Barney video all day if I'd let him. He has strengths too though as most kids with Autism do. He has a fantastic sense of direction. My goal is to make him as independent as possible.

I have a feeling there will be more reponses.

I belong to a couple on-line support groups that have been helpful. We have even had a ladies retreat the past 2 years.

Take care, Jan

I have a nephew that has Autism but is very high functioning. He is 13 years old, but he is right around the level of my 7 year DS. We absolutely adore our nephew and have him over at least once a month to spend the night. My SIL has done wonders with the schools and getting the best possible care for him. If you didn't know him you wouldn't know that he was Autistic at first. He won't look you in the eye when he speaks and always speaks exactly what is on his mind. He is very loving, which I have read is unusual in a child with Autism. When he was little he used to run around screaming and did not want to be touched or hugged. As he got older the therapy that he received helped him so much. Academics is a tough thing for him, but he is trying. The most heart breaking thing is that he now realizes that he is different from his friends at school and has told my SIL that he didn't want to be Autistic anymore. We absolutely love him and cannot wait for the next time to be with him. He is the most sincere person that I think I have ever met.

My girlfriend has a 5yo son who has PDD-non-specific. Before he was diagnosed at 2yo he was just like your son. He came to my home and did nothing but cried & screamed for over 4hrs. They were so used to it that my gf & her 6yo son didn't even pay any attention to him. Now since he's getting services it's amazing. He can still be very withdrawn at times, but he will play with other children. He's learned to point(apparently a big milestone with autistic children) and is getting better about making eye contact.

We're in NYC, so there's a lot of services early on but after 4yo she's had to fight for everything. She found a suupport group and that made it easier.

My 9yo has Aspberger's Syndrome which is on the Autism spectrum. It is getting easier with him as he is getting older... I remember when he was very little, he would have peaks and then valleys. He'd make these enormous leaps ahead and then just as quickly; dive back down but never as low as the previous valley (for which we were thankful!).

We get him exceptional care through the schools. You must be an advocate for your child. If they start to back off from him; go to a Pediatric Neurologist (if you have not already done so) and get a medical diagnosis. It will force the school system to continue working him through the system. My son does well academically with a LOT of help from home and so no longer has to go out for Special Ed. resource room. He still sees the Speech Teacher for 30 minutes each, twice a week.

He is talking! He found his voice at around 6yo but sign language was soooo beneficial up until that time. We used simple sign language for his wants and needs (ie. 'more', 'eat', 'drink', etc.). It cut down immensely on his frustrations... You can find websites online that show simple sign language commands to use with babies and toddlers.

It does get better! Our main focus right now is for him to learn to adapt better socially as we are very concerned about when he reaches middle school and puberty when his peers might not be as kind as they are now... We hope that they will see him for who he is... he's such an amazing person! For now... He is surrounded by a strong and loving home environment; mother, father and older brother. He also has older cousins who are very good to him and treat him like he's king. He is truly a blessing to all of us.

Well I have been blessed with my husband who is Asperger syndrome and an 8 year old son who also has Asperger syndrome, Adhd,Depression, and anxiety. This was a road I didn't want to go down and nothing I would have wanted...But what the 2 of them have taught me in 11 years I wouldn't trade for anything. Yes it is hard yes it has been a stuggle but they see things so different that what I do and I love seeing both sides. There are some days that I HATE ASPERGERs but I curse and scream and the next day they are still there and I enjoy them again. At first I thought I would never make it with these two but I changed a bunch of things and now everything works like clock work. I have also learned that this is not the end of the world. I am also very lucky that my son is high functioning and can speak. So I count my blessings everyday.

Peace

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cmemaloy@yahoo.com


I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

Life! is a coin. You can spend it anyway you wish, but you can only spend it once.

My daughter is autistic but very high functioning. She's 8 and is in a regular 3rd grade class with minimal support services (speech, resource for behavior). She was tested and diagnosed at age 3 and has been receiving services since. She didn't really speak until age 4 and her behavior was unbearable. We still have some behavior issues, but she gets straight a's in school. Her main problem is behavior and social skills.

I've spent years fighting to get her in the right class, school, services, etc and am finally at a point where we don't have to fight for it anymore. For those of you with little ones, it does get better which is something I thought would never happen at several (okay many) points. She went from no speech to testing into the gifted class in less than 4 years!

The support groups around here were autrocious (sp); many of the regulars would sit around plotting to get whatever they could from the system and how if diagnosed early children could be cured. Uugh, not my cup of tea to be polite!

have to agree with charleston it does really get better. Those low days when you want to hide in the corner of the room and cry get farther and farther apart. You life seems to work around the many issues that autism brings. example...I love to shop and used to take my son all the time well that didn't work for my son and he would throw fits that were crazy {one time he bite the bagger at the grocery store} So I learned he shouldn't go shopping and now we are both happy. It really does get easier

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cmemaloy@yahoo.com


I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

Life! is a coin. You can spend it anyway you wish, but you can only spend it once.

My identical twin nieces are autistic. They have been in a regular class for 3 yrs (this yr got rid of their aid). They tested in the normal range this last time. I personally feel they are still a bit behind in language (they are hard to understand, and it takes them a minute to get whatever they are trying to say out). They went from not making any eye contact, screaming and hiding if you dared to look at them, they had issues with clothes (even in the dead of winter as soon as they came over they stripped), and only ate a few foods. The progress they have made is amazing.

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I've never lied to you. I've always told you some version the of truth.

My son is 10, with Aspergers (high-functioning Autism). He is in a regular classroom at school. He has also been diagnosed with PDD, ODD, and various other things. I like to refer to him as a buffet - he has a bit of everything! He also has trouble with expressive language, and eye contact. He speaks wonderfully though, and is smart, with a memory like an elephant! Seriously! I just hope his memory stays as good as it is, because I can't remember anything!!
There have been so many advances with Autism, as it is more of an epidemic than it was 10 years ago. Thankfully it is now out in the open, and people are more aware of it.

I have a child that was diagnosed with Aspergers. I am realizing that there is a wide spectrum as it relates to autism. Our child is very high functioning. He is warm, loving, generous, caring. He enjoys being held, kissed, loves attention. He adjusts well to changes in schedules, has a memory like an elephant, does well in school, loves to learn. I think he is the kindest person I have ever met and he is so sensitive! He just loves to do the right thing and absolutely hates displeasing anyone.

charleston2045 mentioned her child's main problems are behavior and social skills - I feel my child does too. He also has difficulty with his motor skills (writing) but NO problems playing video games, lol. Oh and he has difficulty with his speech.

Cuthie thanks for the tip on seeing a Pediatric Neurologist. We had planned to have him re-evaluated to make sure this is indeed what he has, just to be certain.

I just want him to be happy and lead as "normal" life as he can. I hope he can find love, go to college, get married, be independant.

Thanks OP for creating this thread as well as everyone for sharing your stories and experiences. It helps a lot!

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l/ l/ l/
Dont go through life,
GROW through life

Real eyes...realize...real lies.

I have a son, now 14, who has PDD-NOS under the spectrum of Autism. He high functioning as well. He was very difficult as a baby. He is my first child so I would always hear people saying he's late doing EVERYTHING but he's my first so you never want to believe that anything is wrong with your precious angel. Doctors would say he's just late but I knew deep down. Yep, with time, I couldn't deny that he wasn't like other children. I truly believe I was chosen to have him. He's awesome! I worked very hard with him as a child. He started in our school district at age 3 and now he's in regular classes with aid in his main courses. This is the first year he is in all regular classes. Comprehension is always so hard for him and of course, comprehension is needed in all classes and life. When he was in second grade, he could read but wouldn't understand a word he read. As a toddler we could never take a different direction home unless we would hear the screams of terror the entire trip. Repetition was a way of life. I couldn't grocery shop without the awful people looking at me like I was the worst mother ever because he'd scream and cry the entire shopping trip. There were many times I would have loved to say, my child is autistic, mind your own business especially since he kept his comfort in the form of a pacifier all the way to age 5. Potty trained also at 5 years of age. I have always second guessed myself about coming clean with everyone including classmate about his disability but children can be so cruel, adults as well. Last year he took him yearbook to school because he saw other children sign each other's book and I didn't want him to take it because I knew what would happen but my husband said to let him. He brought his yearbook home with fag/gay, etc, written in pen all over the book. This will be what his memory is of 7th grade. I purchased another for him to keep and let the office keep the damaged one. This year he has friends, actual friends! It's so hard to be social and at times he says and does things that are really inappropriate but together we're learning. I would never have thought he would even know what liking a girl felt like but this is the first year he has a crush. Yes, he'll probably have his heart broken but who hasn't. I never thought he would be interested in what fashion is in style but yes, he tells me what he wants to wear. I know I'll always have to work with him. We do a lot of preparing as in acting out situations and how to react to certain situations. It's hard but I wouldn't change him because he's amazing. Thanks for letting me share my son.

sandy
(mom to three boys, one who happens to be autistic)

Oh my goodness, this just about broke my heart!
Hugs to him (and you!)

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l/ l/ l/
Dont go through life,
GROW through life

Real eyes...realize...real lies.

I work with a little boy in my DD's class that has autism. He is the nicest little boy and is very loving

He is also very smart. He sure makes my day when he walks over and gives my a hug just because

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Dawnie
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If there is a will there is a way!

I can feel the love you have for your son in your post, it really is moving and you are a great Mom!

I feel for all of you and can not imagine what life is like for you since I have never been through it.

I was at a baby shower one time and a mom of a dissabled child was sitting next to me and I will never forget what she said when everyone wished the expecting mother a healthy baby. She said "and if it's not healthy, you'll love it even more". I will never forget those words.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

My son wasn't diagnosed until he was 12. It was like a relief to know finally what he was dealing with. He will be 18 next week. He is now in all regular classes and actually is loving his new school that we just moved to. I am fortunate enough to have a co-worker who has twin 14 year old boys with Autism. My son was classified as PDD-NOS and has a lot of the Asperger tendencies. I want to give hugs to the posting about the yearbook. This is absurd. If I were you I would have taken that yearbook up to the principal and shown it to them. Our schools here have ZERO tolerance for these kids being made fun of. It is cruel and awful. These "normal" kids could learn a LOT from our "autistic" kids. I would NOT have sat back and allowed that for my son. I am sure that if you showed the principal they would get your child a NEW yearbook without all that in there. NO ONE should have memories like that.

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Work like you don't need the money,
Love like you've never been hurt, and
Dance like you do when nobody's watching.

MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping

I was hoping I could have found a certain poem before I posted earlier but was unable to find it. This morning I found it. Hope it touches you as it has me. I'm unsure of the name of the author but I remember it's written by an adult who has autism and wanted people to know how it felt to be this child.

The Misunderstood Child

I am the child that looks healthy and fine.
I was born with ten fingers and toes.
but something is different, somewhere in
my mind An what it is, nobody knows.

I am the child that struggles in school.
Though they say I'm perfectly smart.
They tell me I'm lazy-can learn if I try.
but I don't seem to know where to start.

I Am the child that won't wear the clothes
Which hurt me or bother my feet. I dread
sudden noises, can't handle most smells
And tastes - there are few foods I'll eat.

I am the child that can't catch the ball
and runs with awkward gait. I am the one
chosen last for the team And I cringe as
I stand there and wait.

I am the child with whom no one will play-
The one that gets bullied and teased. I try
to fit in and I want to be liked But nothing
I do seems to please.

I am the child that tantrums and freaks Over
Things that seem petty and trite. You'll
never know how I panic inside When i'm lost
in my anger and fright.

I am the child that fidgets and squirms
though I'm told to sit still and be good
Do you think I choose to be out of
control? Don't you know that I would if I could?

I am the child with the broken heart Though
I act like I don't really care. Perhaps there's
a reason God made me this way - some message
he sent me to share.

For I am the child that needs to be loved
And accepted and valued too. I am the child
that is misunderstood. I am different - but look
just like you.

my 19 yo son has aspergers. He had a very tough first semester in college..he had wonder grades however the interactions with peers did him in. He started antidepressents last week and they have helped tremendously. My son was diagnosed at age 12...he is smart as a whip but awkward around peers.

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Live, Love, Laugh

My 16 yo son has Asperger's. He has been on many medications...he has been hospitalized twice. He is very difficult to deal with. I often fear for the safety of my two younger children because of some of his behaviors. He is very intrusive. He has been the cause of many arguments between my husband and myself because of disagreements on how to handle things he does. Do we love this child? Yes, absolutely. However the idea that he may be living with us for the rest of our lives is very distressing.

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Panda

The real destroyer of the liberties of the people is he who spreads among them bounties, donations and benefits. -- Plutarch

This is my 8yr old son
so far its ADHD, PDD-NOS, ODD and even Aspergers, but he doesnt have a fixation on any one thing
so the center for autistic children said PDD-NOS . another doctor said "He's an aspie-he just didn't read the text book"
We've had some really bad times he was in the hospital during thanksgiving this year.
I'm surprised there are so many of us here
Good to know if we need to post, there are understanding ears
I'm sure you all know how hard it is to get an understanding ear from people who dont understand

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I have OCCD
Obsessive-Compulsive Coupon Disorder!!!