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03-01-2007, 11:25 AM
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| children not doing homework SPIN OFF from other thread
1st I want to say I'm not judging anyone on this issue, but I'm also not understanding making sure its done. If you dont teach your children about doing home work isnt that a bad habit for them to get in at such a early age ? I know that my 4 children have alot of homework also, even my Pre-k'er has homework 3 times a week, dont even get my started with the 5th grader... But I do wonder what will happen to your children once they leave the Elementary School ? They will have even more homework after that.I know my 10 year did, she went from having homework 3 times a week to having it 5 times a week in 3 subjects. What about highschool ? they will have TONS and TONS of homework then also. If they are not taught to do their homework in Elementary School, they surely will not be doing it in Middle or High School either. Just seems to me that this is a BAD habit to get a child into and even a harder one to break once the work gets harder to do. I know in College you have homework just about each night and mid and final exams that you WILL have to study for. What happens then to the child that was never taught to do it at home ? I just think the child will fall behind due to the lack of studying at home. I know that at my Children's School from Elementary to High School homework IS 1/3 of the FINAL grade. To the ones that dont see to the child doing the homework because it doesnt count for a grade, what will happen when they move to higher grades and it is part of the final grading ? Will you have a hard time getting your children to do it ? or do you think they will do it with ease ? Again I'm not juding anyone, Just really wanted to understand the reasoning behind it.
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03-01-2007, 11:38 AM
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I have 3 kids and I totally agree with you. I have a 8yr DD, 10 DS, and 17 yr DS. My kids MUST do all homework. NO EXCUSES!! I don't do anything else until their homework is done. My younger 2 know they don't do anything else until it's done. They have seen their older brother do homework for a couple hours a night so they don't complain at the little they have to do compared to him. Kid absolutely must learn at younger ages to do homework. My DS 17 was taught the same thing and he comes home, gets it done and no complaints. I've heard parents making excuses for their kids not gettin their homework done at my kids school and it is such a disservice to those kids. I make no excuses for mine. If it's not done they deserve the 0. Plain & simple. My kids are all A & B students. My oldest has been First honors his entire high school career and I do think being strict with them about homework & studying has been the driving factor with that. My school is the same as yours in that homework is a big part of their grade. At my oldest DS's school homeowrk counts as a test grade every 9 weeks. If it's all done it's an A as a test score. Easy A I say. They do this in all 8 classes he takes. I fell now that he is definately ready for college as he has good homework skills and good study skills. Jen 
__________________ Mom to Jake, Zach & Meghan SJCC STREAKS FOOTBALL!! CLEVELAND BROWNS FOOTBALL! |
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03-01-2007, 11:47 AM
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My boys also do their homework. DS1 just gets his folder and goes. DS2 is a battle to the death everyday.
__________________ TLJ ~ Where opinions are encouraged, not deleted You laugh at me because I am different, I laugh at you because you are all the same. Your mind is like a parachute, it only works when it is open. |
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03-01-2007, 11:52 AM
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You know it is funny. I logged on this morning during breakfast...read that thread, replied to a few and then got going on my housework. That thread has been bugging me ever since. Homework is a fact of life! Even my husband occasionally has "homework" from his secular job, ALWAYS has "homework" from his job as a pastor. My kids have learned that work comes before play...whether it be homework during the week or chores on the weekend. I pray that we are instilling a good work ethic in them. Most concerning to me however is the message of disrespect that is being delivered by allowing the children to NOT do something an adult (in an authority role) has asked them to do. I fear what society is going to be like when this generation that has been raised to do what they want, when they want is going to be like. Seriously. NOW is the time to be training our children for adulthood. I am ALL for letting kids be kids! Mine are the ones in the neighborhood that spend half their time up trees and riding bikes until dark, but they also know that along with life comes responsibilities and they come first. |
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03-01-2007, 11:53 AM
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My boys also do their homework... No ifs, ands, or buts. They get home by 3:20 and eat a snack then hit the homework and are generally done by 4:15 or so and then they can do other things. 9yo=3rd Grade 12yo=6th Grade We have recently allowed my oldest son to no longer bring his band instrument home for daily practice... He has gotten good enough so that the hour in class is enough practice. If he has a concert coming up, he'll start bringing it home again. We also do not have them in any after school activities. We let them *chill* and have friends over and play, play, play... School is THE most important thing in their lives right now. They can have fun in the summertime and when they get to college, LOL. I can not even imagine trying to be the teacher of children with parents who do not back me up on the requirements. It's hard enough already! |
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03-01-2007, 11:53 AM
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It has never been a choice around here. Life is going to make you have to do tons of things that you dont like, dont think are fair, or dont have time for and you've got to figure it out, so it's good to get used to it. If homework wasnt a gradually increasing progression, suddenly getting slammed with 2-4 hours per night in HS/college would be impossible. If possible, weekends are left for free time or at least one weekend day if there is a project of one sort.
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03-01-2007, 12:09 PM
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Gotta say that the other thread really weighs heavy on me. More because of undermining the teachers than the actual work itself. I know that I should mind my own business, but I also believe that it takes a village to raise children.....
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03-01-2007, 01:48 PM
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I'm with all of the above. Parents might feel that they are "sticking up" for their children by undermining the teachers and being "anti-homework" or making it optional, but what is accomplished is so damaging to all involved (except, of course, the anti-homework parents!). The teacher loses their position as a respected authority figure to the offending student (from the non-homework family) The teacher loses their position as a respected authority figure to the ONLOOKING fellow students (who are taking all of this in, by the way! Yes, it DOES have a ripple effect) The other students all lose motivation to complete their own homework. Don't think that my child, who stayed in to complete last night's homework, isn't confused and upset that little Gino proudly reminds the class that his mother told him he didn't have to...) And, yes, even the student from the "anti-homework" family loses out! They are being sent directly conflicting messages by their parents and the other authority figures in their lives. The message that these parents are sending which suggest the kids don't have to play by the rules of all the other kids is only going to confuse and damage to the anti-homework family kids. They may, in fact, be the biggest losers of all, in the end. Parents should play by the rules. If they aren't going to do this, and they aren't going to require their kids to do this, then they need to find a school program that reflects their own philosophies, and stop the negative impact on everyone else. |
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03-01-2007, 01:49 PM
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so many thing each poster has posted are so true to me also. Weekends and Fridays the kids may have their time for doing what ever it is they like to do. For my 10 year old it's staying up later (1 hr later than normal bedtime ). My other 3are allowed to stay up 30-45 mins later than normal. I also don't have my children in after school things. They have so much on their plates as it is, I cannot see adding more to them and the pressure of having to spend every single weekend on a practice field. ( funny but isn't that also like doing homework too ? ) Don't know, Maybe it's because my oldest has claimed she will go to college . I want her to be able to handle the pressure of homework and good study habits many years before she does enter the college years. My children are all A's and A/B's students ( oldest 2, last 2 don't get graded on same system) But however, they find time to play on their Computer's, watch TV and even go outside to play after homework is done. Is it because they are good students with good study habits ? or is it because they know they cannot do anything else till homework is done? or is it because of the 2 altogether ? The day for my children goes as followed 6 AM:: wake up / get dresses for school 7AM:: 10 year gets on bus 7:30 AM :: 4,6 and 8 year old loads up and I drive them to school 7:30 am TILL 3:00 PM they attend school By 3:45::we are home and they hit the table or rooms to do home work till finish between 4:30 and 5:00 PM ::they get baths and ready for bed They are allowed to watch TV, Play on computers etc etc 6Pm ::they eat dinner and watch TV or play on computers till 7 Pm 7 Pm ::its bedtime and the day starts all over next morning. I cannot ever remember my kids taking a mark for not having homework done. Its just apart of their daily work. On weekends we either chill and watch TV, go to the park, play all day on computers. On Sundays after church they must clean their rooms. But as I stated before, I'm not judging other parenting, Just wondering what will happen once they leave the Elementary setting and head to higher expect ions in school. Just seems to me that if they don't learn how to study now, they will not be in good study habits later on. threegirlsthenaboy the thread also bugged me when I read it also. Hence why I posted this thread to help me understand more about it.
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03-01-2007, 01:57 PM
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I've really enjoyed the discussions we have been having on homework, 1st graders, PTO/PTA. It's great to see how everyone thinks and it's nice to know that you are not alone in your feelings! Like I posted in the other thread, I like doing the homework. I enjoy seeing what my DS has learned and also finding out where he is stumbling and if I can help him get over it. DS gets home at 2. He gets a snack and then has freetime til 3. Then we sit and do homework. He finally understands the whole clock and time concept so it's his new responsibility to tell me it's 3. Yesterday I wasn't paying attention and he came to me all upset because it was 3:13 and we hadn't started yet. We are usually done in 30 minutes or less so he gets more free time to be a kid after that too. |
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03-01-2007, 02:19 PM
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oh just thought about something.. My kids ever so often will get a NO HOMEWORK Pass, does anyone Else's school/ teacher do this ? The 2 schools my children attend the 10 year old not only gets the no homework pass but she also can earn out of uniform passes, however, this is only geared for the students that make A or A/B honor roll. the other school will give the students no homework passes for the 9 weeks if they pass all the spelling test with a 90 or above, they also have a program going on at school called *Cub Club* what thats about, If your child does something extra nice or not expected they get a paper to post on a board by the office, their names also will be printed in the paper.. My 8 year old has gotten 7 so far my 6 year old has gotten 4 and my 4 year old has gotten 3 Ah my 4 year old made me so proud the 1st time she got 1, they were at lunch and a child didn't have a place to sit, she moved over and took the classmate by the hand led her to the empty seat and told her here sit by me Ah too sweet ( OK yes that made me very proud of her and I'm bragging LOL sorry ) by earning the *Cub Club* they can be traded in for No Homework if the teacher offers it, or they can run errands for the teacher. It's nothing special to us, However it's a really big deal to the kids. wondering does anyone Else's school do this also ?
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03-01-2007, 03:01 PM
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03-01-2007, 03:24 PM
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Got2save2 Oh.....Your 4 year old sounds like such a sweet little girl Christine
__________________ TLJ ~ Women United in Spirit |
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03-01-2007, 03:28 PM
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I can see both sides to this story. However, as parents, how long are we going to continue saying that 2-4 hrs. of homework every night is acceptable? I would be thrilled if 8th grade DD had less than 2 hrs. work a night. Also, some students work faster than others so it takes them less time. So should the slower working students be punished by spending at least an hour longer on homework than the faster working student? DD gets so frustrated when so much of her time is spent on homework and there's no free time left for her to do what she wants to do. Homework seems to be an all or none situation. Somedays will be little or no homework and the next day will be work in 3 subjects that takes hours to complete. I believe our children are being pushed too hard, there's not enough time to be a kid and have fun. |
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03-01-2007, 04:35 PM
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My kids rarely have more than a half hour's worth of homework-the one in high school has a built-in study block so he gets a lot done there. Although my 8yr. old will fuss about it, it really isn't a big deal for him. We don't make him do it the second he walks in the door from school-he comes home at 3:30, has a snack and plays, and then usually I have him sit down and do it while I'm preparing dinner. There is still plenty of time left for more play, some tv watching, basketball practice, etc. There has possibly been a day here or there, but can count on less than one hand, when we literally didn't have time to do homework-I just sent a note in to explain to the teacher, and then we completed it the next night. I do believe it reinforces what they have learned in school, and they do need to learn good study habits at a young age.
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03-01-2007, 04:37 PM
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You have a great point there Genichols. I can see what you are meaning. Does your school offer after school help ?. I only know that the Middle school offers Math and reading, or is it science ?. My 10 year old does have alot of homework at times. At times she can and does spend up to 4 hrs or more studying it plus the week of the testing. But this isn't a nightly deal or at least not yet anyway. My 8 year old has alot of homework to me, he has 20 spelling words a week with 5 bonus words. he also has his spelling words from science and Social Studies to remember.Plus his Math and sight words. I will agree with everyone there's more homework now than when I was attending school at the same age. But OTSH, It's a changing world which we all live in. Demands are no long a GED OR HSD, You all but have to have a college degree in most fields. Maybe thats why they tend to push children harder now than b4. My 10 year has claimed she will become a zoologist since she was 4 years old. I have high hopes she will do just that since this seems to be her life long dream. This degree will require 4 years of college maybe even more depending on where this takes her. However, she also knows if she doesn't do good in school she can forget about college. there's no free rides. My 8 year old claims he will own a motorbike shop , however, I believe thats the 8 year talking LOL. But I still believe good study habits are a must for any of our children to survive in this world of ours. I talked to my 4 year old teacher today at school about this thread and the others. She agreed with me and others that homework is a very important thing to teach our children at a early age. She also agreed with many parents on here also about all the homework thats placed on our children and she feels our school does place way too much on them. But she said with good study habits they can over come the challenges and learn to study well. I just wanted to see how everyone feels about this, both sides have alot of great points on the matter. also glad to see this thread can be used to learn different points on the matter in a friendly adult way. ameri-clean THANK YOU, Cheyenne is a great little girl. she's very caring and has the heart of a teddy bear. I almost cried when they told me what she did. I was so proud of her doing this. I told her what a great friend you are to Margaretta ( spelling it wrong I'm sure )... she told me she is my best friend 
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03-01-2007, 06:23 PM
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It sounds to me like most of you are SAHMs. I wonder if that influences your opinion on homework. I don't have a huge problem with homework, but it really does make my life more difficult. I am a divorced/single working mom with 3 kids, age 7,8, and 11. At least 2 of my kids need help with homework every night. My youngest is getting extra reading help, so he has additional reading homework every night. I get off of work at 5:00. I pick up my kids from daycare as soon as I get off, and we get home at about 5:30. I fix supper and we eat, then I clean the kitchen. By this time it's usually at least 6:30 (if I'm lucky). That's when we do homework. And, I say we, because I usually have to help at least two kids with homework, quizing, going over math facts, or reading every night. This takes about an hour. Then the boys have their baths and go straight to bed (at 8:00). By that time wer're all stressed and snapping at each other. When exactly are they supposed to play? When are we supposed to have family time (other than every other weekend when they're home and not at Dad's). I know that they do have some time to play at daycare (they're there for about an hour, but some of that is snack time) and about 30 minutes while I cook, but I just don't think that's enough! And, again, that's not family time. They're kids. When are they supposed to have kid time???? I can't even imagine how things would be if they were involved in sports or band! |
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03-01-2007, 06:31 PM
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03-01-2007, 06:41 PM
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Danilynn you do bring alot to the table, Yes I'm a SAHM. so you are probably right that does make a huge difference in the time we share as a family. I can see where working families would have little time for their *family time * during the week. If I worked outside the home I probably would be very jealous of the homework taking so much of my children's time.... Is there anyway the daycare could help with some of the homework ? maybe help take a little load off you ? It's been 23+ years since I had a child in the day care setting so I don't know if they even offer this. However, the after school program ( Its like a daycare for working parents ) offers helping with children's homework while there., Does your school offer this program ? If so maybe you could look into that instead of the daycare. might be worth looking into too. The every other weekend thing is also something i don't deal with. but i can see how that also would have a huge part into the family time as well. This is why I posted this, I wanted help in seeing why some parents didn't make their children do homework, It's a good post I think, you are not looking Thur the same color glasses. It has to be very hard for the single-working Mother's and the 2 parent working family to deal with 4+hrs of homework each night.
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03-01-2007, 09:16 PM
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Can you have your kids start their homework at the kitchen table while you do the dishes to get a head start? Maybe you can give a hand while cooking/cleaning up. I know that I have to multi-task....ALOT.  Another possibility is going with a slightly later bedtime. 8:00 is kinda early for an 11 year old (to me)....my 12 year old has a 9:30 bedtime and he has to get up at 6:15.... Even letting the 11YO have a later bedtime might help you get some 1:1 together. Good luck...and make the most of your weekends! cj/ |
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03-01-2007, 09:29 PM
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Just wondering Why do you guys think that kids have so much HW in the first place? I don't have a problem when you have do finish up something extra that you didn't get in class. But, two to four hours of HW for students seems a bit much. Do you ever wonder why they have so much....could it be the teachers have no control anymore over their classrooms and so all the interuptions cause them not to be able to do the work in class. So then the the kids that do behave get punished by having to deal with so much work every night. |
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03-02-2007, 06:49 AM
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I have always been told to base it on 10 min per grade (ex 5th grade gets 50 minutes). I have control in my classroom, but not enough time in my day to give the kids time to practice what we have learned that day. I agree that it sends a bad message if the parent tells a child that they do not have to do what a teacher said. I have had a student in the past who said "my mom said I didn't have to do..." That really undermines a teachers authority. If you have a problem with something a school does either a. Talk with the school or teacher yourself or b. Find a different school you like or c. Home school |
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03-02-2007, 06:58 AM
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My boys have always been expected to do their homework right after they get home from school. It is much harder for us if they play for a while and then I have to get them back in school mode. My kids are now 16 and almost 13. Their amount of homework has actually gone down. My oldest is in 10th grade and he has had homework maybe 4 times this school year. It was that he was just finishing up something and it took about 15 minutes. He is in advanced placement classes and I figured he would have more homework, that was not the case. My 7th grader does not have much day to day homework but that is because he finishes it in class. He has more projects than anything. As of right now, he has 3 big projects that are due in the next couple of weeks. I am right in the middle on the homework stand. I feel that about 7 hours a day at school is enough, and if the kids are doing well and picking up the concepts they are being taught then extra work at home is not really needed. But, I also feel that if they are needing a little more practice or studying then 20-20 minutes of homework a night is not a big deal. Darlene
__________________ Sell crazy some place else, we are all stocked up here. |
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03-02-2007, 08:30 AM
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"My kids ever so often will get a NO HOMEWORK Pass, does anyone Else's school/ teacher do this ?" Mine does! But, I am so mean that I won't let them use them! They can trade them if for a treat here at home. I explained to them that the homework is to benefit their learning so if they don't do it, they are losing out. None of my kids are brainiacs so they really do need the extra practice that homework provides! They all happily trade it in the pass for a treat! "It sounds to me like most of you are SAHMs" You are right. I am sure it does make a huge difference. I have five hours after school with my kids compared to your two and a half. But, you know, you are doing what you have to do. Just the fact that you are concerned shows what a good Mom you are. I can't tell you how many Mommies I saw when I worked at a Daycare that appeared to not be really concerned with kid time or family time...they'd bring them in on their days off, pick them up at the last minute so they'd have more ME time...it was sad. It is too bad your daycare provider doesn't provide a homework time...although you might still need to help prepare for spelling/math test and such, at least the bulk of the homework would be done. |
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03-02-2007, 10:43 AM
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Thanks everyone for the suggestions and nice words. Re: Bedtime. From 8 till 8:30 my boys are allowed to read a book to wind down (my youngest sometimes plays letter games on his leapster, because his reading ability is very limited). At 8:30, it's lights out . My 11 year old sometimes asks for extra reading time, and if he does, I let him read until 9:00. But, they're usually all ready to go to sleep at 8:30, & if they don't get their 10 hours of sleep, mornings are usually a nightmare. Re: Homework @ daycare. Daycare does "allow" kids to do homework while they're there, but they don't force it or offer assistance. There's just too many kids per adult. I actually despise the whole daycare thing. I was a SAHM until my divorce. Then I had no choice but to go to work. When I did, it just reinforced all of the negative ideas I had about daycare in general. First, it was nearly impossible for me to find a daycare that provided transportation to/from school. I was able to find one, and that's where they go now. There was only one daycare that had openings that was on the school bus route. My boys went there last year and cried almost every day that the teachers were mean and they hated it. They don't really like the daycare they're at now, but it seems to be the lesser of two evils. There is an after school program at the school through the YMCA that I understand is pretty good. We've been on the waiting list there for 2 years. Luckily, we don't have hours and hours of homework each night. Right now, we're able to get all of it done in about an hour. My 11 year old is also great about helping my 7 year old with his extra reading assignments. I can't even imagine what I'd do if we had hours each night as some of you have discussed. |
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03-02-2007, 10:44 AM
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I get 4 hours with my kids before bedtime. After working I pick them up from school (gets out at 3:45 and we don't get home til about 4 or 4:10 depending on traffic) Dinner prep and eating: 1.5 hours (sometimes 2) 2.5 hours left exercise: AT LEAST 30 minutes (I don't want my kids to be an obese statistic. Health is very important) 2 hours left bedtime prep: bath, brush teeth, pjs, pick out clothes for next day: 45 minutes to 1 hour 1 hour left Daddy time: reading story, talking about your day, bonding: 30 minutes 30 minutes left 45 minutes of mandatory reading a night for DS: oops...that already puts up 15 minutes past bedtime. He usually has about 30 minutes of homework a night so oops...that's 45 minutes past bedtime. School wants him to be a part of an afterschool activity called Odessey of the Mind which takes an additional 1.5 hours afterschool 2 times a week and 2 hours each weekend. How much more does a 2nd grader need to do? If he did everything the school dished out, he would not go to bed til 9:30 or 10 which is not happening at 7 years old. He is quick too so I hate to think the struggles the not so quick kids have (and time it takes for them) to complete the same work If school got out at 2 or 2:30...fine, homework away but as it is, my kids have NO TIME for friends, playdates, extended family....kids need to be kids and need family time (friends would be nice but family first) When do your kids get out of school? I used to get out about 2:45 as a kid. Mine go a full hour longer and then we have a drive home and they are talking of extending the school day to 5:30 so that would be that much less time
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03-02-2007, 11:18 AM
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"I can't tell you how many Mommies I saw when I worked at a Daycare that appeared to not be really concerned with kid time or family time...they'd bring them in on their days off, pick them up at the last minute so they'd have more ME time...it was sad. " threegirlsthenaboy - I don't even know how to respond to this. I USED to be this woman. I would drop my kids off on my day off or go shopping after work and then pick them up right before closing. I am now a work at home mom and no longer need to use daycare. I get my kids on the bus in the morning and am there when they get off in the afternoon. I can't really defend my old ways, but, understand why people (myself included) do/did this. Working full time with kids can be extremely stressful - working moms do need some time to "decompress". (Don't flame me here - I know that being a SAHM can be stressful too.) It wasn't that I had no concern for family time or kid time, I just used the extra time at the daycare to help me transition from the working "me" to the mom "me". Anyway, I can sincerely say that our quality of life has improved since I stopped working full time. On the topic of homework - yes, kids do have a lot more homework now than back in my day. I'm not exactly thrilled about it, but, I would NEVER tell my kids not to do their homework. Kids need to learn how to respect authority (teachers). Also, I feel that if my kids learn how to do homework at a now when they are young it should be easier for them later when they get to high school and college. |
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03-02-2007, 11:26 AM
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I'm curious about something, this is the second reference I've seen saying that dinner prep and/or eating takes 1-1½ hours. My children set the table, clear and load the dishwasher. Sometimes they help a little with the prep. While I'm fixing dinner they're doing homework, I can drill them on spelling or when they were younger it was a good time to read silently or out loud. I don't see dinner time for children taking so long.
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03-02-2007, 11:35 AM
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Making dinner is 30 minutes for me usually. We involve the kids in making dinner and feel that's very important. They also have other chores to do (that I didn't mention in my above post) that they do (bathroom cleaning, bedroom cleaning etc). Then we sit together as a family at the table and eat and that's about 40 minutes and then there is cleanup which the kids help with. Them helping me with dinner is "mommy time" (notice I only have daddy time in my post). It is crucial to our relationship. We do talk about school and I'll quiz them on stuff I know they are working on but I feel it's important to have them help prepare them meal.
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03-02-2007, 12:01 PM
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thanks for posting. there isn't *mommy time* in the morning. It's a race to get them ready and out the door to be driven to school by my DH. So you get an extra hour that I don't get. I am a WAHM (work at home mom) but that doesn't give me more time with my kids than my DH who works outside the home other than dinner making. If my kids got home at 3:15 they would have time for more homework.
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03-02-2007, 12:16 PM
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Oops... I deleted the post that you are referring to as I felt I was off-topic. Let me put it back. This one was between smurf's last two posts. You are quick and I didn't think the MC servers would post it that quickly... Sorry!9yo - Third Grade - 8:00 gets on bus, 3:15 gets off bus. School day is from 8:40-3:00. Recess before school, after lunch and in the afternoon. We get Mommy time in the morning after oldest DS gets on the bus. Homework is generally 30-45 minutes (longer if handwriting is involved). Lights out at 8:30. Reads before bed. 12yo - Sixth Grade - 7:05 gets on bus, 3:15 gets off bus. School day is from 7:45-2:45. Recess before school and after lunch. Study hour last period of day and usually finishes homework. If he has homework, it is between 30-45 minutes. We get Mommy time before bed. Lights out at 8:45. No specified amount of time but he reads before bed. Daddy time is anywhere where they can fit it in from after dinner until bedtime... He gets home at 5:30 and we try to eat by 6pm. Your kids have a long day (and so do you!). I truly do understand where you are coming from! These little kids really do have such limited time to have *chill-out* time and if the newspaper had an article saying that they day was being extended to 5:30, I'd be irate. |
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03-02-2007, 12:29 PM
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Our schools policy is homework every day. Sometimes they can start it in class and if they are fast most of it can be done there. My 4th grade dd has no problem with homework. My 5th grader has always been a pain about it. The solution for him is to let him get up early in the mornin (6:30) to do it. We tried all different things before we came up with something that works for him. I wish they had no homework, but since they do they have to do it.
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03-02-2007, 12:32 PM
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Dinner prep generally takes me about 30 minutes. We spend about 30 minutes at the table. Loading/unloading the dishwasher, washing pots/pans and other kitchen clean up takes about 15 to 20 minutes. I can usually get one volunteer to "help" cook and that does give me some quality 1:1 time with at least one of my boys. I don't usually push chores too much during the week. During the week, the boys do some chores that are absolutely necessary (like clearing the table after breakfast and supper and taking out the garbage), but the heavier stuff we usually spend a few hours each Sunday afternoon doing.
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03-02-2007, 04:38 PM
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Crockpot dinners are nice ( chicken, soups, chili, etc ) even over dinners are less cooking time,, pop them in let em bake. My Husband also works outside the home 6 days a week up to 13 hrs a day, no less than 10 hrs. Spending time with the kids b4 bedtime is VERY VERY Important to us. We figured a way for him to spend just a little more time with them each day, he gets them up, dressed and goes over the homework from the night b4. This works really well with us, it gives him 1 more hr to spend with the kids aday. Is that possible with your family ? DaniLynn, I'm just like you, the kids don't have to do heavy cleaning unless it's Friday ( Like today they have to clean their rooms so we can go to the park in the AM ),,, If it's not that bad they clean it on Sundays after church. If my kids had to clean everyday plus the reg chores (setting the table,clearing the table, picking/ clean up after baths PLUS homework they too would not get in the bed till Midnight LOL.. Not going to happen in my house. nts560, I so agree with you on this. But I think what she meant was the Mommies that just leave their children there all because they can. My oldest worked in a daycare and I have visited the center many times I too have see this very same thing she is talking about. However, I understand where you are coming from 100% you have to regroup or you will go crazy at some point. Good for you to also being aware of your Mental Health and doing what you know you have to do to keep it . airbornearmywife thats a GREAT System you have !! 10 mins per grade level. Wonder if the Teachers have ever heard of this B4 at my kids school LOL... Sounds like it works pretty well Eh ? I'm super glad this thread has stayed nice, its good to see each poster trying to help each other out with ideas on how or what might add a little more time in for *Family time* Thank- You everyone for keeping this nice
__________________ MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping |
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03-02-2007, 06:09 PM
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Having my DH get the kids ready isn't an option. They get up at 7:00 and out the door at 8:00 and it takes him most of that time to get himself ready. He is not a morning person and the kids take the full hour to get ready and eat. I swear they take 30 minutes to eat breakfast! We do what works for us although I understand that it may not work for everyone. I try to even make their *fun* time on the weekends educational. They can't play video games or computer games unless they are educational. What's funny is that my son hates the timed math tests at school but loves a website that essentially does the same thing, only on a PC. Timed math at his level. So he is learning and loves to learn. I just don't feel that doing every piece of homework that comes in is that important. I know you disagree but we'll have to agree to disagree.
__________________ Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003 |
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03-02-2007, 06:13 PM
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__________________ Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003 |
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03-02-2007, 06:31 PM
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That was what was recommended (10 minutes per grade level based on medium ability) in teacher's prep classes in college when I went about 20 years ago but so many teachers disregard it or times have changed because of federal legislation -- No Child Left Behind (NCLB). It was also recommended that homework be review so that kids could 'show off' what they learned... Parents were NOT to be teaching the children new material. This is all based on the developmental ability of children at certain ages. Legislators do not know a thing about any of this... Thus the prolonged school days and homework requirements. Gotta get those good test scores ya know! |
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03-02-2007, 06:36 PM
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of coarse at 2nd grade that sounds fine but I think 50 minutes in 5th grade is way too much. Also, what's that 10 minutes based on? 10 minutes it will take the average student or the slowest student? What takes one kid 20 minutes can take another student 30 or 40
__________________ Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003 |
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03-02-2007, 06:41 PM
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Yes, I agree with you. It seems like after 5th grade (for my kids anyway), the homework dropped way off as they now have a study period in which to get a lot done. The time is based on average/middle ability. Not every child can fit in to the little box that the education system tries to get them into. It's just too bad that the government can't 'stay out of it' but when they are spending our tax dollars toward our children's education, I guess it is a necessary *evil*. |
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03-02-2007, 06:58 PM
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OH I AGREE 100%. I hate that NCLB ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  Take my son's case. he's is 6 years old and has autism, but yet because of the NCLB Act he was placed in a REG K-5 classroom, Now I understand completely about the needing to be around *Normal* children, however, this is NOT the best for my son due to his being so far behind on grade levels.SOOOOO, Because of the NCLB, He sits in a reg classroom and gets *special help* 5 times a day, which means 5 times aday he is PULLED out of the *REG* classroom and taken to another room for studying. Now someone PLEASE tell me how does that make sense ?? Let's break that down 8:05 in classroom 8:05 till 8:15 pledge,announcements, and a puppet show on how to work for that day( No its really cute and the kids love it LOL ) 8:15 till 8:30 place book bags, get reading books and pencils ready 8:30 till 9:15 they read, write and go over sight words 9;15 till 9:45 he leaves 9:45 comes back 9:50 till 10:20 he leaves 10:30 till 10:50 eats lunch 10:50 till 11:20 he leaves 11:20 TILL 11:30 comes back(motor skills help, silly only 10 mins WTH ? ) 11:30 till 12:05 PE 12:05 till 1:35 he leaves 1:35 comes back 1:35 till 2:00 he leaves 2:00 till 2:15 he comes back , bell rings he goes outside for me to pick up total time spent in classroom less than 2 hrs in REG classroom Now, if they did what I asked and placed him in a LD,OREMR classroom he would spend the total day there working on ALL subjects to get the help he lacks. However, I cannot get them to move him , BUT next year he WILL be placed in a LD OR EMR Classroom or holly heck will break lose there ! The NCLB Is a great idea if it's used correctly and not shoved down the parents throats about your child needs to be around *Normal* children, well he has 2 sisters and a brother thats *Normal* at home , So this DOESN'T fly with me at all, its all about the testing when it comes down to it, about the MONEY and staying off the *Red Flag school list* No am I in favor of this, well yes if it's use the way it should be with testing and homework for the AVG student. and No because it places too much pressure of students that cannot keep up or lack the ability to keep on task. Smurf, Understand totally, I don't like a lot of Crockpot dinners either, to be frank I don't know of any I like lol.... Maybe one day things will lighten up on the homework , I understand wanting to be a family while having so much to deal with on your plate.
__________________ MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping |
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03-02-2007, 07:31 PM
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Oh man...that bites with your son getting pulled from class. My DD has a kid in her kindergarten class pulled out about 4 times a day. He isn't autistic but has a learning disability (although I can't remember which one). It's distracting to the class and hard for him I think. So glad this didn't end up in a drag down "I'm right and you are wrong" fight Nice to see all sides
__________________ Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003 |
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03-02-2007, 10:49 PM
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Oh please don't take it the wrong way...going shopping once a week or even a couple of times before you pick up the kids is smart. I'd certainly do that. SO much easier and efficient to shop without the kids. And I totally understand needing time to unwind after work, before you get your kids. I can't imagine working all day and then jumping right back into being a Mommy. The kids I am talking about would be the first ones there last ones picked up EVERY day...Meaning they arrived at the center at 6:30am and didn't get picked up until 6:00pm. We all had at least one in our class. I had one little girl who would sob when her Mom came to get her...just the release of emotion of finally seeing Mommy again...my class was 20mths to 30mths. I know how totally blessed I am to stay at home for now. I am not naive enough to think that I won't ever have to return to work and put my kids into some type of afterschool care. You ladies that work and are Moms rock. I honestly don't think I could do it!! I barely keep my head and house above the water just being home and taking care of two extra little ones! |
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03-02-2007, 10:52 PM
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That is what my school district says and I am so thankful that the teachers are very good about sticking to it. Occasionally they'll have a bit more, but not on a regular basis. |
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03-03-2007, 06:16 AM
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For us, homework became more unpredictable from 5th grade on up. I thought that was because of the transition from a single teacher for all subjects (except foreign language and music) to different teachers for the big 4. I remember always wishing that they would co-ordinate between themselves a little better, so as not to have it be feast or famine. As they get older, they also move to assignments that are given several days in advance and it is up to them to schedule their work. As much as it's difficult to control this as a parent, it is absolutely the right thing to do to make them responsible for planning and executing their work on time. I definitely have a few guys working for me that failed this lesson. cj/ |
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03-03-2007, 07:02 AM
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I hate homework! Sometimes with my middle son I feel like I am having to teach him the subjects. It is not the teachers fault at all because he is one of those kids who won't ask questions. I do feel that homework can be given too much...it seems that a lot of what my kids bring home is just "busy work". I have no issues with them bringing home work that they didn't finish. What is striking to me is that parents today, myself included, seem to be more involved in their children's homework. when I was a kid my parents didn't help me. If I had a report to do they did drop me at the library. If a project was due they bought the supplies and that was it. My brother or I never had to be reminded to do our work...it was our work ya know?! I don't know how or why things changed where kids are always needing help...
__________________ #3 Gone To Race In A Better Place... |
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03-03-2007, 09:40 AM
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I see way to many *projects* now that were obviously completed by the parents. It's so sad. People want their kids to succeed so much that they do their work for them I remember a kid in my college class that had her mom do her english homework. He mom was a english teacher too which makes this both sadder and funnier. She turns her report in and gets a C. She about threw a fit in the class right there! Her mom was so pissed (because she wrote it and it should have been an A) and *had a talk with the teacher*. Don't know how it turned out (I moved and took finals early) but I will always remember it. Kinda like Back To School with Rodney Dangerfield and he pays Kurt Vonnegurt to write a paper on himself and he gets a D or something and he refuses to pay the author. Chrystal1970, I didn't get help when I was young either. My parents expected me to know what was going on in class. If the teacher sent home work I didn't know how to do, she shouldn't have been sending it home in the first place. That was their philosophy. If I did it, I did it. If I didn't, I took the grade hit. I was responsible for making the decision regarding it and had to take the punishment (if any). I guess we end up more like our parents than we would like sometimes...
__________________ Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003 |
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03-03-2007, 07:16 PM
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I think the schools are now 'teaching for the test' -- whatever test they use for No Child Left Behind -- and this takes a huge chunk of time for many months (my 1st grade DS will be tested in April and his class has been practicing since November). Everything is tied to that test so there is a lot of pressure on eveyone (administrators, teachers & students) to do well. Unfortunately, the government has decided that this is the best way to insure that every child gets an education. Personally, I don't mind homework for things that are started but not finished in class. I do have a problem with assigning homework just for the sake of having homework. Our kids are stressed out as it is and having to spend 6 hours in school and then another hour or more doing homework when they get home for a first grader (6 years old) is just crazy to me. Kids need time to just be kids -- run and play with friends, built with legos, draw pictures, create and pretend. FWIW, I have made my opinion known to the schools. If everyone who felt this way would speak up, it's possible that things would change and less meaningless homework would be assigned. Sarah.....mom to Jason & Devin Quote:
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03-03-2007, 07:23 PM
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What gets me even more is the homework projects thare are more work for the parents than the student. My DS is in first grade and often comes home with assignments that start with, "Search the internet for facts about.......". Well, my son is 6 and can not search the internet by himself. He is reading, but not at a level where he can understand web sites not specifically designed for children. So, not only do I have to search for him, I have to read the information to him and explain what it means since it's usually not in terms a 6 year old can understand. Then I have to help him complete the project. I don't understand why they don't give projects that can actually be done completely by the student with minimal assistance from parents. If they don't want the parents to do the work, don't assign work that the students can do by themselves. I do try to have my son do as much of the work as possible, but usually his projects require a large amount of assistance from myself of DH. Sarah........mom to Jason & Devin [quote=sexysmurf]I see way to many *projects* now that were obviously completed by the parents. It's so sad. People want their kids to succeed so much that they do their work for themQUOTE] |
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03-03-2007, 07:33 PM
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I wish that were the case for us. My 1st grade DS is required to read for 20 minutes, practice spelling words, sight words and math facts EVERY DAY. On top of that there are weekly homework projects that take anywhere from 15 minutes to over an hour to complete and extra practice for the upcoming CRCT test (the one that is used for NCLB). Even if reading isn't counted as homework, there is no way we can practice sight words, spelling words & math facts in just 10 minutes a day. Sarah......mom to Jason & Devin Quote:
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03-03-2007, 07:53 PM
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I have an autistic son who is in 5th grade and I am a big supporter of mainstreaming. It is important for him to experience how a typical classroom operates instead of being in a self-contained classroom. Yes, he is pulled out a couple of times daily for speech and to take a test, if needed, but otherwise he's in the classroom with the typical kids. I also have two other children who are not special need, but the way they relate to each other is very different than how he would relate to a classmate. For me, my son needs to see how a normal classroom operates. It will only help him as he goes into highschool.
__________________ I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it! |
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