Ok, i have this best friend for a lil over a year now. We talk everyday! However, the last time I talked to her was last Saturday. I keep calling, sending IM messages, text messages and she will not respond. I have no idea what's wrong. I have passed on her on the road and so has my hubby and neither of us got a wave, smile, nothing - - just rolled her eyes!

I am pretty upset over this as I would like to know what she's mad about. Her boyfriend is also mad I guess cause he want return any calls or wave either.

I have tried to contact her to confront the problem, resolve the problem, etc but it's impossible if she will not respond.

Should I let it go? Be mad?? What??

I was extremely hurt, and still am, but now I am getting a little mad because I feel like she must not have cared about our friendship too much if she will not even tell me what the problem is.

I just would like some advice from yall.......please

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email is moserlara@yahoo.com

I would send her a card telling her how much her friendship means to you and that you would like to talk about any misunderstanding when she is ready. Then all you can do is wait. She must need some time to cool off. Try to get together with some other friends for awhile so you don't feel the loss as acutely.

do you guys have mutual friends? Could someone else say you said something about them? I know that you can say something and there is always that idiot there to misrepresent what you have said. I would go to her face-to-face, not to be confrontational, but to let her know you are in pain and just want to figure out whats wrong!! Good Luck

daltonmama:
just a thought, How long has your friend had this boyfriend ? Could it be that the boyfriend may be stirring up trouble between you two, so your friend will depend on him more ! I would hate to think this was true, but sometime jealousy is the cause. EX: she is always talking to you and he wants the attention she shows you. Just a thought worth considering.

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Marie

Kindness can heal a Broken Heart

has she ever did this before?

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Please don't take this the wrong way but could it possibly be because you talk to each other too much? I have a co-worker, whom I love dearly, but she used to call me every day and I'm not talking about a short 20 minute conversation. She will talk for hours and when you try to hang up she'll say "Well I call you back later". I honestly stopped answering the phone alot when she would call. She's one of my dearest friends but I don't feel that I need to talk to her every day.
Please don't take anything I said the wrong way. I don't want to offend you. I'm just trying to give you another possibilty.

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"Let me watch my children grow to see what they become
Lord don't let that cold wind blow til I'm too old to die young'

I appreciate all of the replies. None were taken personally.

My friend's boyfriend finally dropped me a message online saying what the problem is.
See, He accidentally blacked her eye. She asked me to stop by that day and look at it so I did when I was out. When I got back home, my hubby had company and asked me where I had been and I told him. Well this 'company' went and spread around town that I said that the boyfriend had beat her and stuff, so she is mad at me for something someone partially overheard during a personal conversation between me and my husband........unbelievable!!! My friend still has not talked to me and I am not going to try anymore. I feel like if we were 'really' friends then she should have asked me about this or confronted me, but she didn't and still hasn't, so I guess that means our friendship was a real one to start with. I give up. Nothing more I can do or so about it. HEY, but at least I have you guys right???

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email is moserlara@yahoo.com

I think your friend is probably very embarrassed by what happened to her and rather than place the blame where it belongs (on the boyfriend and the "company") it falls on you. Odds are the black eye could very well NOT have been an accident and the fact that others know anything happened at all is making her have to take a look at things.....

If you care for this woman/girl, please consider keeping an open mind about your relationship. Down the road, IF the black eye is more than it seems, she very well may just need a riend in you...

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Have the courage to be yourself.

Keep an eye on her... Don't let this 'accident' become a habit. Sometimes, withdrawing from family and close friends is a sign that something is going on (ie depression, a lot of things). If you and she are very close, it is worth it. I'd do as someone else suggested and send her a card or something that only she -- not the boyfriend -- will read and be sure to tell her to let you know if she ever needs anything that you are there for her.

I would still go talk to HER face to face. Whats if the boyfriend is lying to you to cover soemthing he is or did? I would hate to see the friendship end without at least trying to talk to her.

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Laura
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UUUMMMM yeah of course I'm going to stick my two cents worth into this new development.


Many abusers are master manipulators, and they will actually be able to convince their spouse/partner that it was indeed an accident. I would not give up on her so easily....if this is what has been going on...and I don't know....she will need to know she has a soft place to land when it gets really bad. I think maybe she showed you first b/c if you her best friend bought the BS hook, line and sinker then it would be easier to convince others. I don't know the whole situation but, I have seen way to many of these cases in the E.R. Just a thought............

I'm with eveyone else. It probably wasn't an "accident" especially since the boyfriend was the one who finally offered an explanation. It seems that he's keeping her away from you so the real truth won't come out. Keep an eye on her and maybe send an email telling her you still want to be friends. That way she will know that if things do get bad she wi have someone to turn to. Good luck.

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"Let me watch my children grow to see what they become
Lord don't let that cold wind blow til I'm too old to die young'

Before everyone starts jumping to conclusions and judging too fast, it IS possible this is an accident. My ex-boyfriend once accidentally gave me a black eye in a mall parking lot. We were holding hands, and I was being silly: I kissed his hand, then quickly stretched out my hand (still holding his) so that our hands were in front of his face. HE did the same to me playing along, but accidentally hit my right eye! I laughed about it for a week 'cause I was able to make up all sorts of stories and no matter how outrageous, people believed me b/c I had a black eye.

My advice is to be careful in judging this person because if it was an honest accident, you might permanently damage your friendship that might be repair-able. I have learned that nothing ruins a friendship faster than one person not liking or in judging the boy/girlfriend of the other.