DD got invited to a b'day party for a friend of hers. I wouldn't say they are BEST friends, but, they are good friends. The invitation tells you to bring $29 to go to an amusement type park for the party. I know DD wants to go, since it is her friend, but, since when did parents start charging the guests to come to their kids' party??

What do you think of this, and what do you think you would do???

Thanks.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

oh boy.

Its almost like ... no actually it is .... they want to not have to pay for each person invited, so... if you want to send your child you will send her with a gift AND with money to get into the park.

I don't think I would send my daughter.



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DD got an invite to Prom this year, she is going, and is excited...a friend of hers asked if we would pay for her ticket so she could go too (another homeschooler).

So DD is upset because I won't pay for someone else's kid! $80 a ticket--not pocket change. I guess the other girl's parents cant afford it.

DD is going with some other girls and a friend of ours owns a limo service to take them to and from Prom for free...but we can't afford to send DD's friends to prom.

back on topic though--

You gotta wonder who's idea it was to have a birthday party at an amusement park?

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SPJRNTGADL!

Uhhhhh...lemme think......NO!

I would not send her. I think that's redunkulous! When you give a party you should not expect the guest to pay for it. Tell her that you will take her to the amusement park/locale as a family.

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That's very strange! How much does it cost to go to the park? Is it $29 or more than $29? Maybe they are paying 1/2 or somethng??? I could see them paying the admission, and possibly writing a note to bring some "spending money", but to expect you to pay admission is strange!

That said, I would probably send my child if he really wanted to go, just like it was any other event where a bunch of kids were going.

cj/

Well, I think if you're having a party, you should be able to pay for it yourself. I realize an amusement park is expensive so if I were this girl's parent, I'd have a party, at home or somewhere less expensive and let my child pick one or two friends to go to the amusement park and I'd pay their admission as part of my child's birthday party.

That is REALLY tacky! I would politley say that DD cannot go. I hope DD isn't too upset about it, as I'm sure she'd like to go. I just wouldn't let her go because of the principle of the idea.

Tacky is what I say. At the very least they should have said "in lieu of presents we request that each child pay their own way. Missy is very excited about going to the amusement park with her friends and prefers that to presents"

Even that would be better, but still tacky.

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

That little girl is going to be sadly disappointed when no one shows up at her party.

We usually try to stay in the $10-$20 range with party gifts. $29 is really pushing it (to me!).

Is the actual party itself at the amusement park? If that is the case, I'd probably take my daughter along with a nice gift and then leave before they go to the park. Otherwise, we'd beg off.

Wow! I can't imagine being that tacky. I wouldn't let her go. Sad, cos it's her friend and all but that just isn't right. It would be one thing for the mom to call you up and say the girls all want to go to... we aren't doing a party for her this year but if your daughter would like to go we will chaperone blah blah blah. Curious here... What amusement park is this for? I know it's not Disney that costs more. Is this for Boomers or something like that?

This is tough, but i think i would send her as it isn't your daughters fault that her friends parents are classless. That is like saying if she was to have a party at a party zone that has bounce type things for kids to go on and you each had to pay your own way in. If the childs parents can't afford to do the amusement park for all kids invited then she should rethink the idea and have a small party at home. Some people don't use their brains for sure.

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SAHM of Bailey 12, Tyler 10 , Emily Ann 6, and Ryan Matthew 4 yrs old.

I would say if your DD is THAT upset about it, ask her to invite the birthday girl out to eat at mcd's (cause they will have the shrek 3 toys starting Friday) and then take them to Shrek 3 or a $1 movie...that is still cheaper than $29!! Plus, she won't have to "share" her friends attention with the other party goers (if there are any).
As far as letting her go, I say no...who is going to chapperone these kids? Mom and Dad?? Even if they are mature kids, it's not the kids you don't trust it's the other people. Unless YOU are willing to shell out the cost of another ticket, screw that! My child's well being is more important than a day of hurt feelings!

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I wouldn't let my DD go. My DD's best friend does have her birthday at an amusement park (every year) but they only invite 2 other kids besides the birthday girl and both the mom and dad go for supervision, so 2 adults and 3 kids. They pay for everything, the admission is $35 apiece and food there is a small fortune for lunch, then they stop at a fast food place for dinner. The amusement park is 90 miles away. I wouldn't let her go with just anybody to a place that is crowded and where I wasn't sure of what the supervision was going to be. We always pay for everything when DD has a party whether it is bowling, skating or something like that.

Well, I too think this is rude and not well-thought out. I agree with the poster who said that were it I, I would allow my child to choose either one or two friends that I would then pay for. That way, I could easily and SAFELY chaperone the two or three attendees, plus afford to pay for the day. Then, if my child wanted to celebrate with more than those one or two friends I would offer the chance for a party at home that is inexpensive--cookout, sleepover, something like that.

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I looked it up on line, and the admission is $29. Another poster made mention of that being an expensive gift. hahahha, that's NOT even the GIFT!!!I am and then some. I'm really hoping to see the parents tomorrow night, we have a function at the school, and I'm planning to say "did I read that right??? The kids have to pay to come to the party???" I can't get over the tackiness of it myself, I swear. I am utterly speechless, and believe me, that does not happen often.

We did tell DD she could go if she paid for part of it, but, honestly, we don't even want her to go for the sheer principal of it. I think it will be a last minute judgement call, really. Maybe we could give DD a gift to give to the girl, and drop it off at her house, and tell the parents what we think of it???

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

Three years ago the family went to an amusement park (Cedar Point) for the day and the three kids asked friends (boyfirends/girfriends). We paid for all admissions, food, drinks (it was 96 the day we went). It was an expensive day, but since we invited people we believe it should be our treat. They have a picnic area where we had left a cooler of soft drinks, and a cooler of food, main dishes, salads, deserts, etc. fot the day that the kids(at the time my kids wer all over 18) could come and go throughout the day.

I don't agree with that either. Why would they expect for you to pay to send your kid to their kids party? My parents 30th anniversary was in Dec. and their friend (from canada) wanted to have it held at a fancy place so she wanted myself and my sisters to send out the invitations having the people pay for themselves We refused, we still had a party for them but we just had it catered at my parents house instead. She said that that was the way people did it up there (they pay for themselves). We actually had a really great 25th anniversary party for them but my parents "best friends" couldnt come because they were going on vacation somewhere else so I guess to make up for it she wanted to give them a 30th and then didnt want to pay for any of it Which really upset me since we paid so much for their Silver and she didnt come and then this was her idea to do the 30th and she wanted to take credit for it all too.

By the way not to be rude or anything but do you think that they are possibly paying for some (really good) friends and asking the other parents of the (not really good friends) to pay for their own kids? And how old are these kids? if there are alot of yound kids who is going to be keeping an eye on all the kids that go?

I think that it is tacky and I wouldnt do something like that. If we invite a child/children anywhere with our family it is understood that it is on us because we invited. Most of the time, in a non-bday party setting, the parents will send money with the kid but we usually end up telling them to keep it.


OK... I have another issue. I guess that I might seem a little over protective, but I would not send my child to an amusement park with someone else. I can only think of one other family that I would let my 12 year old go with to the park and we have known them for years amd are very close. I know they parent very much like we do.


Darlene

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Sell crazy some place else, we are all stocked up here.

What do I think of that? I think it's tacky! And I wouldn't let my child go. (Not to mention I would have serious issues with my child going to an amusement park with someone I don't know very well.)

Holly

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Forgiveness is love in its most noble form. -Anonymous

It's tacky, no doubt. But as mentioned before, if it was within my means $$-wise and comfort zone (chaperone-wise), I would allow my son to go. I guess I'm an old softie but I would not want to disappoint the child for the faux-pas of her parents. What if no one agrees to go? She will be so sad on her birthday.

I would call the parents to inquire about the chaperone and driving arrangements, cell phone access, etc. My guess is that the parents are planning a birthday meal or something at the park - and we all know that eating at a theme park is often more expensive than the admission. Anyways, I would check it out with the parents first before making the decision. Another thought is whether you could send an admission ticket in lieu of the $29 and then use your resources (mycoupons, of course ) to figure out how to get a reduced price ticket - AAA or some other offer....

Totally tacky!

Aside from having to pay her way, I just wouldn't feel save sending my child off to a Birthday party at an amusement park...with just the family, yes, with a whole group no.

I would get her a gift and politely decline.

I think its probably an idea that the little girl who was having the birthday came up with and the parents didn't have the heart to tell her no.I think I would fork out the money for my kid to go.Sounds like they would have a ton of fun.

I was thinking the EXACT same thing. I don't think that is the case, tho, since the invitations were printed on the computer, and it's on the invitation. Not to say they couldn't have given different invites to different people, tho. It's a waterpark, btw, and not really that big. I talked to DD about it this morning, and I got so disgusted by the whole situation......... She still wants to go, tho.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

Hmm. Oh boy, I'm sure I will get flamed to no end on this, LOL. But I dont see anything wrong with asking the kids to pay for the admission to the park.Maybe I'm just odd on this. When my son turned 8 in Feb, I told my DD and SIL their kids what we had planned for his BD which it what we do EVERY YEAR with the kids ( we dont have BDP's,) We allow them to pick any place they want to go to eat, Sometimes they pick a cheap place, others they pick one that will end up costing us 10- 15 per person. Since we are already a family of 6 it can and does run into money. If they want to join us they are welcome too, however, We dont pay for it. Since it's not a *Party* per sa, ( More than like;y same as with this, it's not a *party* with cake, ice cream, games, balloons ect ect ect ) it's more like an outing than anything, I dont see the problem at all asking for others to pay their way in. NOW, We do have a BBQ the following weekend at the park, We pick up the tab on this, we buy all the food, drinks, cake, everything but once again, if they attend wonderful, if not thats OK too. The dinner is OUR gift to our children, I dont feel I should have to pick up the tab for everyone wanting to go that night , since this is a gift from us to them. Same case, this might be the way this family is doing it also, the park is THEIR gift to the child, and they dont feel they have to pay for everyone wanting to join. Maybe the child ASKED if so and so can attend and the mom and dad told her already the others will have to pay their own way. Who knows >?... But I would allow mine to go if I felt is was safe and trusted the people taking them.

Again maybe they have a different way of viewing whats a party.
But I wouldn't punish my child(ren) over this, If it bothers you, why not ask about it. ? might be something alone the same lines as what we do for our children.

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MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping

I'm with most everybody else on here. I think it's tacky! It doesn't make sense to invite children to a birthday party that they have to pay to go to and then bring a present too. If you can't afford to pay for everyone, then only invite one or two, or just have a birthday party at home.

Last week, my mom was just telling me about her friend's 12 year old daughter who was invited to a birthday party at an amusement park too. Each child was to pay their own admission, which was $45, bring a gift, and the parents were to drop the kids off at the school to meet at 7:00 in the morning and then go back to the school to pick the kids up at 11:00 at night. The kids were not told to bring any extra spending money, however, they did stop somewhere to eat on the way home, and the kids were expected to pay for their meals themselves. I guess if the kids would have spent all of their money at the park, they probably wouldn't have been able to eat. The only thing the parents paid for was lunch, which was snack food and sandwiches picked up at a grocery store on the way to the park. I told my mom that I was surprised that the parents didn't ask for gas money too! These people had the kids for 16 hours and all they covered was lunch! My mom's friend was out $75 for her daughter to attend this birthday party! I think that's just ridiculous! Can you say TACKY? It's fine if you can't afford to treat everybody to a party like that, but just have a small party at home with cake and ice cream then.

I would have no problem with this. My DS went with a friend for his birthday last summer and I had no problem with it. They had an ABSOLUTE BLAST!!!! So it was well worth the money and those boys will nover forget that day.

Jen

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Mom to Jake, Zach & Meghan
SJCC STREAKS FOOTBALL!!
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There is no way I would let my kid go to a water park without me! How many kids did they invite? How are they going to keep an eye on a bunch of kids at a water park?
And what age are these kids?

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Insanity laughs under pressure we're cracking

I wouldn't like it at all...I think I'd have my daughter pass on this one...It's a shame for the birthday girl that her parents are such idiots... ~Lisa

Payig the $29 wouldn't bother me - not how I would do it, but whatever. However, at a water park without me? No way. I woud be a nervous wreck.

Wait a minute...I've changed my mind the more I've thought about it...DD is 13 and if the girl was a good friend of hers, I'd let her go to the party...I'd do it more for the birthday girl so that she'd have a nice day with her friends...Maybe the family truly can't afford to pay for all of these people and want their daughter to have a nice celebration with her friends...I don't know what their situation is...Personally, I would never do this...ask people to pay their own way...If we didn't have the money, I'd just have the kids over for a sleepover or some kind of get together at our house...Even if I had to scrape together some kind of money for ice cream and cake...Too bad if she wanted this water park party...If we couldn't afford it, we just couldn't afford it...Sure I'd hate to disappoint her, but that's life...I'm sure she'll live...You can't always get what you want...Just because Joey drives a convertible Lexus doesn't mean you're going to drive one too...Just because Susie has her Sweet Sixteen party at a fancy country club doesn't mean you are going to have the same kind of celebration. What do these kids have to look forward to in life? They've been on cruises by the time they're 14. They've driven Mercedes by the time they're 18. Sorry...that's a whole other thread! I'll stop my ranting now! ~Lisa

oh gosh I think it is very tacky and rude to ask people to pay to go to your party! for a group of kids to plan to go somewhere and each person pays, ok, fine, that's one thing...but to actually invite friends to a kids' birthday party and tell them to bring $29 for admission at the party location, wow, I think that is very rude.

When I picked up DD from school today, she told me the girl's "party" was cancelled since we are supposed to get thunderstorms this weekend. Instead, she's just going to hang out with her family. Um, that makes a lot of sense......NOT!!! So, anyway, DD will give her a gift, since it is her b'day, and she is good friends with her. The whole thing I find quite bizarre, but, am glad I no longer have to deal with the should she or shouldn't she go,issue.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

ITA!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. - Will Rogers

My 10 year year old son said that it was "dumb". So, there you go.

It's tacky. If you can't afford to pay for the kids to go, then don't invite them. Part of the benefit of giving a party is getting the presents. In this case, what are the parents anteing up? My daughter wants to invite kids to her birthday party and she wants to go to a local indoor water park. I told her well you have two choices. One, we can have a slumber party and I can throw her a nice party at a park w/ barbeque, paddle boats, etc., for a very economical price and she can have as many friends as she wants, or 2) she can have one or two friends and go to the water park. I would NEVER ask parents to pay admision to a "party" that I was throwing for my child.

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Proud Wife of an Army Soldier and proud mother of an Army MP currently serving in Iraq.


"To any critics who say a woman can't think and work and carry a baby at the same time, I'd just like to escort that Neanderthal back to the cave." - Sarah Palin

Hopefully, the girl comes through this unscathed and with her true friends intact AND that the parents learned a lesson from this.

That is sweet of your daughter to give her the gift.

Thanks for the update! I had been wondering what you had decided. Your efforts were truly thoughtful in trying to figure out what to do! I guess they made the decision for you.

I am glad it worked out for you.

The more I thought about it, the more my opinion changed, sort of.

To me is shows how many kids are being raised these days. Many parents just are afraid to say no to their kids. Sure a party at a water park would be grand and fun and make many memories...but to me the life lesson learned from saying, "honey I am sorry we just can't afford that" is far more valuable. It seems kids these days are being given anything they want because they "deserve" it or want it. Never mind teaching a child to live within the means the family has...there is nothing wrong with a small party at home...or taking one friend to the water park.

I'm glad it worked out for you...maybe people called and complained and they decided to forget the whole things. By the way, I would have been even LESS likely to allow my kids to go to a water park than an amusement park.