Went back to court today for a follow up with son... He got 30 days in the detention home.. 30 DAYS!! The probation officer said he would recommend 14 to "wake him up". We got there and ex husband told judge that he had broke a rule and had his girlfriend spend the night last night so judge gave him 30 days!!
The worst feeling in the world watching your son get handcuffed and taken away...

I can only imagine! How horrible for you to have to go through. Is his dad trying to throw him under the bus with that....maybe he is doing it out of love?!?! I am so sorry for what your family is having to go through right now. It will go by fast I'm sure. Hang in there and PM me if you need some "behind the scenes" support.

__________________
Vicki


TLJ Women united in Spirit!

I am sorry that your son is in the position he is. I hope for his sake and the whole family that he will be able to use the 30 days that he is in the detention center to find a better path for himself.

I am sure that it will be hard for your to have him gone. I hope the days pass quickly for you.

<<hugs>>

Darlene

__________________
Sell crazy some place else, we are all stocked up here.

oh, I am so sorry...that is really harsh!!!!

((hugs))

I'm so sorry your family is going through this!

__________________
Bevogal

I am so sorry you and your family are going through this.

Thanks guys.. do you ever wonder how many tears you can cry??

Tears are infinite, and, believe it or not, can be quite helpful and cleansing. I am so sorry you and your family are going through this. Hopefully this will be a wake-up call for your son. However, I believe your ex did not mean to make it worse for your son....your son will be very angry about that. Now, if he had done something really bad on top of this, like tested positive for drugs, gotten drunk, or stolen something, that might be something that NEEDED to be brought up. However, to throw him under the bus for the girlfriend thing was not necessary in my never to be humble opinion. Hang in there and feel free to come here, vent, and get hugs all around!

__________________
"Well-Behaved Women SELDOM make history."Laurel Thatcher Ulrich


"Yesterday is but a vision, and tomorrow is only a dream. But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a dream of hope." Anonymous

"Your candle does not lose it's light by lighting another candle" Generosity

Have the courage to be yourself.

Julie I was a AWFUL child/teen when i was growing up, hopefully your son while one day just see everything in a whole new light like I did, I apoligized to my mom numberous times over the years after that stage and still do when I go visit her grave. I spent 7 months in a detention center, that didnt turn me around and really dont know what did, just happened one day. {{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}

__________________
Books just wanna be FREE! See what I mean at:
http://bookcrossing.com

My other favorites
www.paperbackswap.com
www.wheresgeorge.com
www.geocaching.com

I see it differently that the others here. Your son broke ANOTHER rule. Your ex didn't do it, your son did and he knew he was going to court the next day. It shows his disregard for authority. Don't blame your ex for your son's poor choices. I hope 30 days teaches your son something worthwhile.

__________________
oupiglet...addicted to free stuff!

I agree with oupiglet. Your son broke a rule. I think your ex was right in telling the judge that the rule was broken. I know that it doesnt make it less painful to see your child making bad decisions or being punished but maybe it will be what your son needs.

Darlene

__________________
Sell crazy some place else, we are all stocked up here.

Thank you and your not the only one who feels this way. Maybe if punishments were stiffer for these young people Toledo would not be mourning the loss of a police officer due to a 15 year old.

__________________
Laura
Please visit my blog
http://mylifeinlaurasworld.blogspot.com/

As a mother, it has to be one of the hardest things to see your son going through this. My heart goes out to you.

It will be pass... hopefully this will be what it takes for your son to hit rock bottom and begin to dig his way out.


Once he gets out and has stabilized (without the drugs and alcohol), I'd still get him into a doctor and have him tested to see if he has some sort of chemical imbalances, etc. Often drugs and alcohol are self-medication for deeper problems.

I agree! Having worked extensively with teenage gang members, teenage drug addicts/alcoholics, teenager with mulitple problems and in mental health (adults too) everyone needs to held accountable for their actions. Him getting away with something, by failing to have information reported to his probation officer is just enabling him to continue his behavior. Enabling him is not going to help him, it is only going to prolong the time it takes for him to hit his "bottom". Maybe this is what he needs to get the help he needs. Try to look at it as a positive, although I know that is hard. I don't know the whole situation, but if drugs or alchol is involved then look at it as he will live another 30 days, if he is out doing drugs and alcohol then he may not live, or he might do something stupid to really land him some jail time. I know it's hard on the parents, but it's not the end of the world. You can only do so much, he has to do something too.

I just wanted to say I will keep you and your son in my thoughts and prayers. My heart goes out to you.

__________________
Brenda

GO #24 JEFF GORDON

My Heart goes out to you.
Having been in your spot 2 TIMES before, Once with my own DD and then again when I had my 16 year old Meth Addicted Niece arrested know what you are feeling, He has to learn rules are there to PROTECT HIM...

I take it since this rule ws broke then it was part of probation then ?
So he knew this was something that would get him 30 days if he broke it right ? I don't blame your Ex for telling. If you and your EX looked away every time he did something he KNEW he shouldn't being doing,then what good could possibly ever come form that >?.. You will only be teaching him rules are for the OTHER person.
I know it's a bitter pill to have to shallow, but in the long run he will see that when rules are handed down they are there for a reason.

Hang in there this too shall pass, and I hope your son will become stronger and straighten up after this.

Hugs to you.

__________________
MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping