I am quoting something from the parent thread, because I would like to think this warrants more in depth discussion.





The topic is about Angel Trees.


I used to do the angel tree...

It happens only at Christmas.

I would encourage my youngest daughter to take 2 names off the tree...one girl and one boy both no older than 5 years old.

We would pick a couple days and go shopping for these "angels".

We would come home and put all the gifts into a box and then wrap the box put the tag on it and put it back under the angel tree.


All that changed a few years ago when I noticed that now they want gifts to be unwrapped and still in the bags you got them with tags on the items!

To me that just sounds like a scam waiting to happen!!

It's CHRISTMAS... it's supposed to be for kids...and for the person whose name you chose...How can you NOT wrap a gift???

Worse than that... why do you have to leave the tags on? So the parents or guardians can return the items? Doesn't that just defeat the purpose?


~*~

I don't know why Freer doesn't do angel trees anymore...perhaps it is for the same reason as us, but I would like to talk about this a little more in depth.

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SPJRNTGADL!

I haven't done Angel Tree in a couple years, and I really don't remember if they had this stipulation or not??? I remember my person wanted a blanket. That just broke my heart.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I don't see the purpose for the tags being left on unless the gift bought doesn't match what was on the Angel tag. I do understand not wrapping the gifts. I can only imagine what some of the recipients found when opening gifts on Christmas morning and finding used, possibly very used items.
I became acquainted with a person that works for DHS. It's amazing the stories told about people manipulating the system.
There are people out there that due to circumstances need a hand up. But not always a hand out.

We do Angel Tree and like another poster said, it just breaks your heart to see what they want (need). You just want to scoop up all the names. Wow, I've never heard of them asking you to just bring your items in the bag with the tags attached. That does sound like a scam. At our mall, if you show them it's for the Angel Tree, the mall service center will wrap it for free. When my boys were little, we'd pick a boy their age at the time and they would shop for him. It amazed me how they were when getting this little boy's toys -- we'd always get extra.

In our area, they have Angel Tree for the elderly in nursing homes. A friend of mine did that last year and she said it was heartbreaking to see what the elderly asked for. Maybe this year I'll do that, too.

It's a shame that a small percentage of people who are greedy and dishonest ruin it for the rest who really need it.

I just could never imagine giving a used present to someone--especially a child!!

I still don't understand the point of not wrapping a Christmas gift... it is a gift...kids love the gifts, and some little ones appreciate the paper more than the present itself.

In years past, whichever two names we got, our box to each child always included our name and address, a $10 gift certificate to both Wendy's and McDonalds, plus a new outfit (if on the angel tag). The new outfit included shoes, socks/stockings, hair thingies (for girls) and necktie for boy.


Now there is an angel tree at our local parish that we do...those are put up at thanksgiving, and we adopt one family from the parish...

so when Turkey day is around the corner, whatever I buy food wise, I get one extra of each item...box it all up, send it with our name and address to the family with a note that they will have the same meal that we will have on that day.

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SPJRNTGADL!

OK, since this thread was started in my *honor* .... LOL .... here goes....

When I worked for Head Start, a woman asked me to take her to pick up her Toys for Tots gifts. I was absolutely shocked at what they received. There were two very large garbage bags packed full for each child. Each child received a dress outfit, a play outfit, pajamas, and many, many toys. One of those bags was more than what I could afford at the time for my own kids. Then, I found out that most of the recipients also apply for several Angel Trees (various churches, K Mart, Walmart, etc.) Agencies *say* they cross reference to avoid abuse, but that is impossible.

Many of the recipients DO exchange the gifts and clothes for cash. You can imagine what the cash is frequently used for, and it isn't the heating bill.

Sorry if this is too long, or I sound bitter. I really am a nice person and I'd literally give the shirt off my back if someone needed it.

Dss sent a memo out to all employees one year asking that they pick a name off the tree and to get a new toy not a sued something that their child had played with and broken.That memo broke my heart. I called the lady that sent it and she said that the yr before they had received games that was missing peices, puzzles that was also missing peices, coloring books that had already had pictures colored , broken crayons and she went on and on. That is horrible. I could not do this to a child any time . esp. not on christmas!
the local nursing homes I visit also have a angel tree for the residents that dont have family. I picked a name off of the tree at one home last yr and the lady wanted teeth glue, bed room slippers, klennex and lotion. Alot of these homes do not provide this type stuff and if the resident dont have family or money, they dont get it. So I have started using my coupons to get this stuff free or cheap and taking it by there and giving it to whoever needs it. seems there is always coupons for lotion and shampoo and deoraent and such that I can get it for almost free. They are thrilled to get these items. I dont see why they should have to wait till christmas just to get a few things that we all take for granted.

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The gifts are wrapped by volunteers after they are received back at the Angel Tree.

That is so sad. I never thought of nursing homes having an angel tree and people wanting lotion or tissues!! Then I just think of all the BBW coupons I get and how my free lotions I can get for these people. I donate to Love in Action, it is for foster children, and the woman who runs it tell me how the girl ask for bras! The things we take for granted.

I used to work for DHS, at different times I did Child Protective Service and worked in a foster care unit. We (the whole agency) relied on the Angel Tree to get Christmas gifts for the kids in foster care, it was the ONLY place we had to refer a large number of kids to. Most of the time it's the only gifts the kids in foster care get, because alot of times the foster parents can't afford to buy alot of gifts for the kids.

Yes, that is correct.
My understanding is they want the gifts unwrapped for security reasons. I guess you never really know that what's wrapped is safe and is actually a toy or what was requested.
I have also heard of people giving used items.

I guess to protect everyone involved, the Angel sponsors prefer items are unwrapped so they can verify what's inside before giving to the kids.

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Real eyes...realize...real lies.

We have a local program that is similar, and they also want them unwrapped with the tags left on them.

It was explained to us that this was because sometimes, a family might have several children, and each child would've put down 3-5 items they might like. Say, for instance, the family who chose the oldest child's name purchased all three items on that child's list and threw in several related items just to be nice, and the family who purchased on behalf of the youngest child bought that child one thing off of their list of five. The people running the program wanted to be at liberty to go back and exchange some items to "even things up" for the family if need be.

last time i stopped at the angel tree the tags had requests for more expesive stuff than I buy my own kids so I've not done it I can understand the seecurity issuse with all the nutty people in the world though

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Last year we sponsered a family thru a church. They had a program where you pick a family, to purchase and deliver presents/groceries to them. We spent about $300 on their Christmas. Well the day comes to deliver presents, We get their address and go deliver the presents. We very very surprised that they lived in an affluent neighborhood, Big Mcmansion, new cars in the driveway, giant plasma tv in their living room. Clearly they had much more than we could ever afford. We got out of there as quick as we could--"Here's your presents,Merry Christmas, Blah,Blah,Blah--BYE NOW! I was so disgusted. Yes maybe they had fallen on hard times, Yes the kids needed christmas. But I would start selling my plasma and whatever other high ticket items I had, WAY before I ask for anyones help with anything. Will we still donate this Christmas? YES! We will just do a little more research this year to make sure the family is TRULY in need of help. Sorry but if you have a plasma tv, Mcmansion, 2 new cars, You do not need help for Christmas!! Well, maybe a ride to the pawnshop But thats about it.

For as often as people (on this thread) have been burned, what steps do you take to ensure that your gift is given to the proper person/family?

I would have no idea how to investigate a recipient like a family, etc...especially since you aren't getting their name/address ahead of time.

I guess it's like the $$ people donated to Red Cross for the hurricanes, that got dumped into a general fund instead of going to that direct cause.

Is there an alternative to the Angel Tree (that provides names of children) but are not affiliated to Angel tree?

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SPJRNTGADL!

I posted a thread on FreeCycle actually, asking people where I could donate things??? I got LOTS of info. from them, and then with the organizations I was interested in, I called the different places and asked them how they help people, and what are the criteria for people to get help?? The ones I felt most comfortable with, and confident my donations would provide the most benefit, I went with them. I really like to give DIRECTLY to people in need. There is a local Homeless Veterans home that I give to. I have been to "the house" several times, and am impressed with the work they do. They are in the newspaper a lot, and get NO funding from the gov't.

I donate to local children's homes, instead of the Angel Tree. There is a facility here that houses children awaiting placement in Foster Care.

I guess my best advice to you is to investigate the different agencies, and go from there.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I stopped Angel Tree and Toys for Tots for so many reasons. Angel Tree wasn't doing enough research and too many scamsters were taking advantage. They go from place to place getting their free stuff. Toys for Tots same thing. So many take advantage that it is impossible to know who is really in need.

Now I go through a program we have at school. We have specific families given to us from CPS. They do not have a list or wants from the family. They tell us what that specific family really needs. Underwear, socks, tshirts, shoes etc. I spend the entire year shopping for them. clearance at Target and Kohls is great for socks, undies and tshirts. I pick up brushes and combs and hair ties etc. on clearance as well. Whenever I see shoes for $3.98 or less I grab several in different sizes.

I also give to a local women's shelter. They need clothing for interviews, makeup, hair things. They get all my free shampoo, conditioner, toothpaste. I also look for nylons on clearance for them. Simple straight skirts, jackets. etc. heels, nice flats etc.

It's hard when you see all the abuse. We know that there are people out there that really are in need, we just have to be careful and do the research.

I did the Angel Tree for the very 1st time last year. I use to always just stop by and look at what was being requested during the season of Giving. I was AMAZED at what they had listed. Color Game boy's. AIR Nike's. Xboy's I mean high Dollar items. Sorry I know it's every child's wish to get the items they want form *Santa* However. I have explained to my own Children since they could understand that Santa just can't bring what they wanted *All the time*

However, The items on last years Angel Tree were just HEART BREAKING TO ME. One child wanted the Potato head ( Star War ) another child wanted a Baby Doll. Another wanted Board Games. I ended up getting 4 names off the Tree n buying their wish gift form Santa.

I use to Hate the Angel Tree from what I have always seen on the Wish List. WHAT DOES IT MATTER what you are given ??? I think most is NOT what the child wants but for the most part what would help the MOST ON THE PARENTS MONEY.

I have always felt, If you couldn't afford to buy gifts for your Child then WHY listed XXX just say a Game, Baby Doll or Shoes. KWIM ?Why does it have to be Air Nike's ??? Or X-BOX. Or Color Game boys ??Is it really for the child or help the parents by NOT having got shell out that kind of money as all the items cost a little more than what I'm willing to pay for my own children.

I hate to see Children do with out it;'s HEART BREAKING...And a Sad country we live in when a child 's parents have to ask for help with raising their child/ But thats what is happening now days. But on the same hand Just be happy others are willing to help carry your load and Don't request items that would be the TOTAL budget of someone e;ses child Santa.

I don't give to TOY FOR TOTS. Sorry I think this program has too many holes for me to give too.
When I see on TV Just about every child getting a Bike or X-box Games It makes me Ill.Plus it makes me feel bad that I cannot afford to help since the request are items that cost the TOTAL Budget of my own Child's Santa.

It's also a SAD AFFAIR When People cannot even afford to feed their Families on a holiday, Just think about the other days when the Child will go with out a meal because there's no money to buy food with. Heart Breaking to me/

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I took from the angel tree this year I gave the child a princess nightgown I had got on clearance & made a princess pillow to match & gave some free baby washes got free with coupons & stuff & bought a baby doll so didnt cost me much at all & I am sure the little girl appreciated it. I just do what I can every year & hope its making a difference for at least one child.

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mom of 3 greats girls

the Salvation Army in our area screens families and makes names available to the public at Christmas. Also they have "toy shopping" for the parents with donated toys. This might be an alternative for you.

My team at work volunteered to sort toys from Toys for Tots that were donated to "the projects" in a city in central Massachusetts last Christmas. I was absolutely amazed at the quantity and quality of toys collected. We were setting it up so that the children's parents could come in and shop for the items that they wanted. All was well until we noticed the girls who worked there were setting aside things for themselves and their families and talking about how much every family would get. It was kinda sickening.

I also more or less gave up on the Angel Tree that is run as community service by my corporation because of the nature of the requested gifts and also the request to provide receipts. I really do not like the way this program has evolved - why not just ask for money? Typically, people put so much thought and energy into shopping for their selected child and really enjoyed doing so, but the way they do it now really takes away from that. Whatever happened to being thankful and grateful for whatever was given? After I gave up on the kids, I started to do the seniors from the Angel Tree but even then, they've moved to asking mostly for Gift Certificates.

The whole subject makes me sad.

cj/

And this is what makes this thread tie hand-in-hand with allinaugust's thread about donations / handouts.

very sad really...

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SPJRNTGADL!

My Grandfather is in a nursing home, and my Mom stops at least 4 times a week to eat dinner with him then she goes out into the lobby and plays the piano for all residents, and on Saturdays she bakes them a special dessert and eats dinner with the residents and then serves her dessert, and she always stays to play for them, then also. She breaks my heart when she talks about how few of these poor people have no family come visit them. Nursing homes don't provide a lot of things, and I am really ashamed to say I had never thought of possibly donating these items to them......this is something I will start doing....

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"You can never really pay back. You can only pay forward."

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O-H-I-O

I stopped doing the Angel Tree several years ago when some of our neighbors used it even the the father made enough money. They would blow their money and then come up and say "Oh we don't have any money to pay our bills or buy food" yet every payday I would see them come home with unnecessary things and within two days their money was gone. I also worked with a husband and wife who were constantly saying that they couldn't afford to pay the bills or buy food and would even convince other employees to put boxes for food donations in our lounge yet a few days after they would ask for help you would see them out shopping buying video games and other junk. They also put their children on the Angel Tree and I feel if they can afford to go out and buy a $50 video game 2-3 times a month then they don't really need help. It's a shame because it hurts the children who really don't have anything and it breaks my heart.

I now do the nursing home Angel Tree. It's very sad when all they ask for is shampoo or lotion. Alot of people there have no family and I hope that by giving them something for Christmas, I gave them something to smile and about and a little ray of hope that someone out there does care.

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"Let me watch my children grow to see what they become
Lord don't let that cold wind blow til I'm too old to die young'

I will not do Angel Trees or Toys for Tots for the reasons so many others have shared.

I donate to a local womens shelter year round. At Christmas I also donate some items that would brighten up the holiday for kids. I buy things like coloring books and crayons, card games, simple art sets, etc. Things are cheap for me to buy, don't use batteries, don't make a ton of noise and don't take up much space. The shelter is always very happy to get the items.

I also do an angel tree type thing for residents at a local nursing home. They want such basic things as lotion and candy. The funniest was the year a guy had ciggys on his wish list. The lists were approved by the nursing staff so it was ok for him to have them. I took his name and bought him a couple packs, I figured at his age(he was 85)smoking probably wasn't going to shorten his life very much and if it brought him happiness so be it. It was the first time I ever bought smokes and I'm over 30.

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Jesus SAVES by shopping smartly and using double coupons!

Ohhhh boy - they just started advertising our "Back to School" drive to benefit needy children in the local area - "This year with a new look!".

What's the new look? Well, instead of providing a backpack with supplies, an outfit, and a sweatshirt/sweater....this year, volunteers must provide a backpack with supplies and a minimum $50 GC to a local store. "These changes are to make it easier on the receiving families AND the volunteer." Well, they have one less volunteer to make it easier for!

I used to look forward to the Back to School and Holiday Angel activities...used to do several kids on my own....but I've really lost interest in it as it becomes more like a cash operation....

What do you think? Would you participate?

cj/

NOPE! I donate supplies to a local back to school giveaway and to the school. Our school keeps a stash of supplies for kids that can not afford supplies. We are a small school so the front office girls know who the kids are in need. I would not in any way shape or form give $50.

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TLJ ~ Women United in Spirit

The $50 is for clothing on top of the backpack with supplies. I think it's a lot for us smart shoppers!

I am always the first one to volunteer for anything and everything and to give a helping hand whenever I can. But I can honestly say i would not do this. There is no way that I would donate a $50.00 gift certificate. There isn't a way to prove that the money is going to the child that really needs it and not to Mom and Dad. Wow. I never say no to anything but this I would.

backpack with supplies and a minimum $50 GC to a local store What is the $50 G.C. for, since the child now has what is needed for school?
I donate supplies to the school I work at and some to where my DDs go to school, but that is it. We have families at work that we can 'sponser' but I honestly don't feel the school screens well enough or says "no" enough.
Angel Tree..I understand no wrapping, but not giving receipts. Honestly, if I do something like that, I don't leave the receipt as I am suppose to.

As far as needy familys, that can be argued with too. My kids get free lunch because of the number of people in our family. We don't need handouts and turn them away everytime we are offered. I would rather they went to a family that really needs them.

No, I wouldn't do that either. They are taking away the "voluntary" donation part, and REQUIRING you to do it. How aobut the time you donate to help sort and give out the stuff??? That is a very strange thing to require of someone who is volunteering. I'll bet you aren't the only one not doing it this year.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I don't do angle trees for reasons already stated. We did adopt a family last year because they are "supposed" to be needy. I heard great stories of people who loved doing it and the families they helped. So, I got a single mother in school with a dd. We "thought" it was just the two of them since that's what the form she filled out said. We arrived with a Christmas dinner and gifts 2 days before xmas. We couldn't believe what we saw. She lived with her parents in their house (so we were 2 people shy in the dinner) AND she it was a nice house with 2 Harley's in the driveway. She seemed annoyed I brought my kids who thought they were helping someone "who had less". Her DD was playing a sony whatever thing on a big screen TV...neither of which we had at the time (we have a plasma now).

I felt really betrayed and decieved. If I were living with my parents who were well off, I wouldn't be applying for free gifts. I HATED leaving them there....just hATED it. I won't do it again

I do donate directly to people I KNOW are in need though and abuse shelters. I'll give a hungry person food but will NOT give anyone cash

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