At what age did you have the "TALK" with your kids?

Are there any good sites/books to reference from?

How did you go about the discussion?

My kids have really never asked, my son thinks that making out is something that "married people do".

So I am just curious as to what age you all did your talks.

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I have gone over the very basic stuff with my son. I bought the book "How You Are Changing" (From the Learning About Sex Series for the Christian Family) by Jane Graver. It is for ages 8-11 and their parents. Discussion or individual use.

I set it on my son's bookshelf and told him it was about puberty and stuff like that. And said that he can read it when he wants to and then let us know if he has any questions.

I also have "Questions Kids Ask About Sex : Honest Answers for Every Age" by Melissa R. Cox. Again, it is a Christian based book (I tend to lean more towards the Christian beliefs, although I am not a highly religious person). It goes from pre-school all the way up to adult, and discusses any and every possible situation. However, this book stays with me, as it could be a bit too advanced for my son if he decides he wants to start flipping pages.

Good luck!! I was dreading the whole puberty and talking about sex thing. I just told my son that women have eggs, boys have sperm, and when the sperm and egg meet a baby is formed. I didn't tell him how they meet, but he knows what it takes to make a baby. DNA wise anyway.

Well, with kids going through puberty earlier and earlier (especially the girls) we started have the "body changes" class at school for the 3rd graders on up. We used to only do it for the 5th graders, but since so many girls started earlier, they decided to hit 'em before it's too late. Parents were not talking to their kids and we had girls getting their periods and had no clue what was happening.

I'm not talking full on sexual reproduction class here, just about bodily changes etc. I would start with that, let him/her digest that, and move on to the rest later.

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Thanks for the advise so far! Like I said neither one of may kids are asking anything yet. But my son is getting close to puberty I think. He is 10yrs old 5'2 and 102lbs. He has always been tall for his age, but I can start to see little changes.

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I was telling my son (10 years old) about how cute his little nose was. He complained that it was not cute yesterday because it was greasy. I asked why it was greasy. He sighed and said "Puberty".

He knows that he will soon be changing - he will start wearing deodorant in 5th grade (we decided that years ago - it is amazing how many kids in his class actually have a body odor at their young age) - and knows about new hair sprouting and the importance of bathing on a regular basis.

He is a smart kid. I just want to go over the basics before the school does. While I dread the questions, I want to make sure that he has it all out there in a child friendly form (the book) that he can read when he feels like it.

We started telling our kids about basics while they were really young (3 or 4) and just have added to the conversation as they get older....My parents did this with me and was grateful, since it was something we could talk about, I never felt grossed out or odd asking questions.....and my kids will ask me some dandy question, but they ask, and thats what we wanted.......

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"You can never really pay back. You can only pay forward."

Wayne Woodrow “Woody” Hayes

O-H-I-O

My Son started wearing deoderant almost 2yrs ago. He has some raunchy BO. Bathes everyday!

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Leave me alone!!!!!

Jason and the house of estrogen...

My 7 and 5 year old started asking about babies and where they came from. We had told them them "from mommies tummy" and they never asked HOW they got there or how they got out. Then they asked right in the middle of dinner out of the blue LOL . We got a book called "It's not the Stork" and read it to both of them and answered questions they might have. We haven't talked about body changes yet but we plan on buying the book by the same authors that talk about bodies (don't remember the name). It looked great when I thumbed thru it at Barnes & Noble

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

if you ask Ohio .. they will tell you 3rd grade for the sex/condoms/pro-choice classes...

if you ask me, I say it's based on the child's maturity level...not the child's age or grade.

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SPJRNTGADL!

Wow, third grade for the sex/condom talk! I'm glad we aren't in Ohio!!!

My son and I did talk a little about puberty today on the way to his baseball game. And it wasn't so bad...


Thanks for all the great advice though!!!!

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yep!! DD came home with permission paperwork for me to sign...and in fine print at the bottom, it said that if a parent REFUSED to consent, the child would receive ISS (in school suspension) until the form was signed.

I yanked her out of that school district and we have homeschooled her ever since. Never looked back, and I am really proud of her--she is 16 and is in homeschool high school as well as community college...next year she will get her diploma and her associate's degree.

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SPJRNTGADL!

"and I am really proud of her--she is 16 and is in homeschool high school as well as community college...next year she will get her diploma and her associate's degree."
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This is Awesome!!! good for her.

Plus ISS is a little steep for someone who is not willing to let their 3rd grader hear and sex and condoms!

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I work in the book department of a store and there is a book for girls called "The Care and Keeping of You" or something very close to that. I glanced at it while stocking the shelf one day and it seems to be very good at explaining about puberty, including getting your period, complete with very detailed but easy to understand drawings of the various reproductive organs. It also discusses such things as nutrition, exercise, personal hygiene, etc. It's presented in a very easy to read format and seems to really be written on a young girls level.

If I did have a girl in the 9 or so age range, I would get this book and tell her she can look at it if she wants and if she had any questions I would be more than happy to talk with her. Then I would secretly check the book every so often to see if it showed signs of being read. I wouldn't say anything about it but I would check just because I'm nosy.

I can remember when I was a kid there was an afterschool special(remember those??)called "My Mother Is Having a Baby" and it expalined how babies are made, using cartoons that showed the various stages of pregnancy from the sperm and egg coming together, the fetus developing, the mothers body changing, and finaly how the baby comes out. It combined live action of a boy wondering about his mothers pregnancy and adjusting to the idea of having a new baby in the family with cartoons about the "nuts and bolts" of pregnancy. I don't recall how they dealth with how the sperm got into the mothers body but I know it wasn't graphic. My mother and I watched it together and it was very informative and helped "break the ice" about this touchy topic.

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Do a search on Amazon, and you will find that there are lots of books out there. Some are really basic for younger children -- using animals to explain some things. There are choices for ages 3 thru adult.

I've always just talked lightly about things and added to it as my son has gotten older. We started when he was 2 or 3. My son is adopted so explaining a little about the facts of life went along with telling him that he was adopted.

I work at a library now. He's in middle school. They have some films and talks at school that I have signed permission for. When I see an interesting book come through the library, I check it out and stick it with a couple of other books. I've seen him reading about body things. We talk alot. I think my son is more comfortable talking body changes with me rather than my husband. I try to teach him to respect his body and that the basic facts are not a big deal. It's just part of life.

Getting back to the Amazon search -- you can get things from a Christian perspective, animals, basic my mommy's having a baby, etc. People will write reviews at the bottom of the book page, and you can see what might fit your family. You might be able to find it at your local library or bookstore. You can preview it then.

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Donna

Our school system starts talking to them in the 4th grade. Actually it was pretty neat the way they did at DD's school- they had a mother-daughter tea so the mothers could be present if they wanted to when they talked to them- they had us watch some old movie and the school nurse went over just puberty with them. There was no mention of sex- it was mainly body changes. They gave the girls and us Moms booklets about it to read to at home. All the 4th grade girls were there whether their Moms were or not.
It was so interesting to watch all of these girls reactions- most of them were totally grossed out by it. I was kind of surprised that they told the girls about masturbation a little- they also told them to go into a bathroom one day and look at themselves with a mirror in the private area.

At the same time-the boys were meeting with one of the men coaches and having their talk.

In the paperwork they sent home before- it listed exactly what they go over- 5th grade they add about babies and start going into sex. This year the only thing they even touched on was that babies were made between 2 married people.

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Mom to Katie 1/95 and Sara 5/97

quoting from my thread about "things mom used to say"... you could always use the line someone posted:

"you know how you got here? Two buzzards bumped butts and you fell out"


rotflol...still has me laughin!!!

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SPJRNTGADL!

Girl.....You think that's funny

Christine

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TLJ ~ Women United in Spirit