The time has come for this... We have a DS who is 12, and 7.5 yr old twins (boy/girl). The oldest child is bleeding us dry w/ his requests for Xbox game rentals, drinks from Starbucks, social events at the Y.. the list goes on and on and ON! OMG! I *never* have any $$ due to him. (And believe me, I say no ALOT, we do NOT give our kids the latest and greatest whatever, nor do they have everything they want.) My daughter actually SAVES every cent she gets! She has more $$ than we do at any given time!

So, that said... What is a good amount? I was thinking of $10/week, no more than $15 that's for sure. Or maybe $1/yr? So he'd get $12? What about our youngest? Tied into chores? Or should they just do the chores regardless?

I'm sick... and tired... of doing everything around here w/ no help from them. I believe they think I was put on this earth for the sole purpose of picking up after everyone. Yes, I admit, I like the house to be kept straightened up, I don't want to live in a pigsty. But I also think they should be helping by now!

Thanks for your guidance in this matter!

Suzanne

Edited to add: I told DS about the new system/allowance. I also told him that HE would be responsible for paying for any game rentals, Starbucks treats, and if he wants to go to a "tween" event at the Y, that's his responsibility, too. I said WE would pay for everything school related - lunches, field trips, materials fees, uniforms, school supplies, etc - but that he would be picking up all the extras. Was I right about this? All those extras add up BIG TIME!!!!

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Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant, filled with odd waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like. - Lemony Snicket

What we do is....

Our 4 oldest children have set chores, that they must do, after all the are part of the family. These aren't anything special, just make beds, pick up toys, actually get dirty clothes into the hamper, and put their own clean clothes away, and maintain their school items, such as backpacks and lunchboxs.....Then we have extras. The extras are their chance to earn money. We have it set up so they get paid a certain amount for each level of chores they do.....1-5 they get 1.00, 6-10 they get 2.00 and 11-15 3.00 so on and so on......There are times that they get offered money for chores that pop up.
My oldest DD also gets an extra 4.00 dollars a week for watching her younger sisters (while I'm home) so Mom can shower at least 3 times a week by herself......and to help occupy them some if I'm in the middle of something and I need to finish.....

Don't know if that was any help or not.


almost forgot if they do not do their regular chores they are not eligible to earn money, and are required to do at least 2 freebie extras....this has worked well for us

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"You can never really pay back. You can only pay forward."

Wayne Woodrow “Woody” Hayes

O-H-I-O

My dd's are 11 & 13. They get $5 per week for certain chores. I pay for all essentials like you mentioned above - school, field trips, clothes (except when she goes shopping with friends), activities, etc. Oldest also babysits and we bonus occasionally for special things - going above and beyond without being asked.

Oldest pays for going out with friends to movies, dinner, treats, concession stand at school games, etc. (We pay for all this when we go out as a family). She saves a lot, though. She also asks for gift cards for birthdays and Christmas and uses those when she goes shopping with friends.

Youngest saves a lot, but buys stuff like candy at the checkout & Webkinz or occassionally something that she wants that we don't feel is necessary and she doesn't want to wait until birthday or Christmas.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

I don't believe in allowance for chores personally. I think chores are part of being a family. I don't get paid for *my* chores so they don't either. My oldest is 8 so it hasn't come to the point where he wants money yet.He gets birthday and xmas money from family so he has that when I say no but he'd rather save it. When they are a bit older (my youngest is 6), we'll probably do $1 per year of age per week whether they do their chores or not but it will be tied into their behavior. Being a butthead will not get you $$$

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

Ours get $1/for every yr old they are. This is tied into how they've behaved for the week, if they did their homework, brushed their teeth, combed their hair, and got ready for school without a hassle. It's also related to how the family is doing for $. They know that everyone has hard times, and if the family recently had to buy a new washer (for instance), they do without allowance for a week or two, to help out.

We buy everything that is necessary, and I will treat them to something small maybe once a week, or every other week (by small I mean something from the dollar section at Target, or maybe a candy bar at the grocery store). Half goes immediately into savings, and cannot be touched. Anything else they want, they get themselves, and they all know that their purchases are made at our discretion. I won't allow them to purchase something that I think is inappropriate, or will not be used.

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If you really want something in this life, you have to work for it. Now, quiet! The're about to announce the lottery numbers... - Homer Simpson

oldest dd gets $20 a week she spends it exactly the same every week $10 to rollerskate & $10 on lunches at school she has to do chores & watch her little sisters a little bit

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mom of 3 greats girls

My son is 12. He gets $10.00 a week for spending money. He has certain jobs that he HAS to do around the house because he lives there and that's just life. I expect him to pay for a lot of his stuff.

He wanted a cell phone badly, so he had to save his money up for it. Then he ran through his minutes, and had to save for another minutes card. He tends to buy a lot of gum. I remind him when we know he has things coming up. When there is a middle school social, we pay the $4.00 for him to go, but he has to use his own money to buy treats and things there. He rarely gets Starbuck type things that we pay for. He will splurge with his money occasionally, but that seems to be lessening. He's learning how far a dollar can go. He has to rent his own video games too.

We just kind of balance things out. I find special jobs that I pay him to do for me so he can occasionally earn some extra money. This helps if he is saving up for something. If he doesn't do his daily jobs though, he doesn't get his $10.00 spending money, and all other money becomes very tight too.

We don't call it allowance exactly. I want him to have some money because he has to learn how to use it right. We just kind of say that we all have to pitch in to make the family and house run correctly, and he is needed to be part of that. His job is to do well in school and in the community, and to pitch in at home.

It seems to be working for us.

Hope this helps~

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Donna

My 10 and 11 year old get $5 a week and it is not tied into doing anything. If they want to buy something at the store they know that they have to have their own money so they don't even ask. (most of the time). Also if we go to Disneyland, the fair, etc... they need to have their own spending money. It's funny that with their own money they are not so quick about wanting something. Both of them are very good about saving their money for a bigger purchase. I find that I save money by giving them an allowance. They both started getting an allowance at around age 3 and 4 but at that time it was around $2. My oldest son is 20 and he never got an allowance. At the time I was working and if we went to the store and he wanted something I would usually get it for him. When he got money for birthdays he would spend it right away and never save it for more then a day or two. He never learned that some things are worth waiting for. He still is not able to save money. I think that giving the two younger ones an allowance will help them with saving money for the rest of their lives. I just wish I had done it with my oldest.

My children get the amount of what grade they are in at school. 4th grader gets $4 and 6th grader gets $6 per week. They are opposite when it comes to handling money. Younger one, DD, is a saver and waits to spend on something after much thought. DS is impulsive and often spends his allowence before he even gets it. UGH! They both have some chores around the house but very few. Mostly I expect them to just help out when asked.

I like how you do it per grade. For me doing $1 per age was more then I could afford.

I really like the idea of doing by grade......we could never afford to do it by age (6 kids would add up way too fast!) Might have to talk to DH about changing over to that.....Might be easier to keep track of.

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"You can never really pay back. You can only pay forward."

Wayne Woodrow “Woody” Hayes

O-H-I-O

I give my kids 1/2 of however old they are. So, if they are 10 years old - they get $5/week. I give it to them because they are part of the family. But, I do expect them to help around the house - dishes, laundry, trash, pick up dog doo, etc. I just don't tie it to the allowance.

This has worked well, and the kids don't complain that their sibling gets more than the other, because they all make the same at one time or another!! :O)

On their Birthday, they know they get a raise each year - it's kind of fun!

We do the $1 per year, but we do things a little differently. 10% (or the nearest .25 to that) goes to charity, then 50% to the bank for savings and the rest is spending money. When the charity money has accumulated enough, the kids decide which charity to spend it on, my DH & I match it with our own money, then shop for who we've decided to help (food pantry, animal shelter, etc). The saving goes to the bank at least once a month so they can see a change when their statement comes each month. We're trying to teach our kids now how to handle their money more responsibly so they know how to do it when they get older. They both already know if there is something they want (new toy, etc) that they will need to save their money. Now instead of hearing "I want that", I hear "I want to save my money for that" (of course with my daughter she'll be saving forever for all of the things she wants )

We don't tie allowance to chores, but they do have chores they are expected to do as part of the family and they lose privileges if they're not done. They can earn extra money if they do extra chores, though, like helping me in the garden or cleaning out my car. So far it works wonderfully for us. I do expect to have to increase the amount of "spending money" they get as they get older and have more out of school activities to pay for, though. I don't think $6 spending money is enough for a 12 year old each week.

Renee

Oh, one thing I forgot to add. We do the "Mommy & Daddy 401(k) with 100% match"! We have always matched them 100% on anything they deposit into the bank until age 13. At 13, we reduced it to 50% as it was getting expensive with her babysitting money. They still spend money on what they want, but it's been an incentive for them to deposit into their savings accounts. We've told them at around age 16 or when they get a regular job, we will quit matching completely.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

Oh my gosh, how funny -
When y'all said $1 a year I thought you meant $1 per calender year as in 2¢ a week!
But I'm sure you mean $1 per age year, right? Like a 10 yr old would get $10 a week.

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Mary

That sounds like an interesting idea! Do you have any early wiithdrawal penalties?

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

A friend told us this and it has worked for us. They get their age in $$ per month, so my 8 and 6 year olds get $8 and $6 per month respectively. I don't pay by the week...I never have cash and I've been known to borrow from them! In return they have regular chores.

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Mom to Miss C & Mr. E
Former SAHM now working full time
feboll@neo.rr.com

Wow, you all have some great ideas I like to 401k match thing alot.

No, we haven't had that come up yet!

We tell them to think about how much they want to keep when they make deposit and at any given time they usually have $30-$40 on them. Both say they are saving for a car.

We put the bulk of their savings into a CD a couple years ago. The savings account was earning 1.x% and the CD was 5.X%. We asked them 1st and made sure they understood they could not get it out for a year if they wanted it. Both agreed and then we renewed for another year.

I make sure they are involved in the decisions and understand what we are doing & why.

Who knows if it will work, but I am hoping it makes them smart about their money. We don't give them specifics about our money, but we do let them know that we have savings and investments, etc. That they have to save for the rest of their lives.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

We do half their age per week. I wish we could do their age, but that would be about what DH and I get for spending a week. (We have 4 kids). I also give DS (13) and DD (12) an extra $10 a month for their lunch account. This goes for snacks, extra meal items, etc. I still give them their lunch money. I give middle DS (9) about $.50 per time he buys his meal for an extra treat. (Not all ahead like the older ones. He isn't ready for that "budgeting" yet!

I also take off if they do not fulfill responsibilities. (hey...if I am late to work or don't do my job, I lose my salary.)