I see your posts, and I am really trying hard to understand. It seems like you all definitely love your husbands and children, and as a traditional wife, know your "place" in the home. It sounds like your husband is the leader, and makes the calls, and it is your duty to be somewhat submissive and to serve him. BUT, where do YOU draw the line. What if your husband wants to engage in something that you are totally against---for instance, porn....Can you refuse him and will he respect that, or must you go along w/ it in order for him not to stray to other "pastures.?" Just really curious about the traditional wife role. I always thought I was a traditional wife. I stayed at home with the kids, and DH worked to support us. While I did most of the work around the home, we were pretty equal w/ the decision making. So what I am asking, is could you please define your roles as traditional wives in your own words so that perhaps we can understand your point of views more readily? Thank you. Lynne

I consider myself pretty traditional. I don't serve him though. yes i make lunches , dinners, breakfast , clean his nasty underwear, but he's not afraid to pitch in and help.If he wanted to look at porn he could do it with 2 black eyes! I'm pretty headstrong and have not one bit of submissive feelings in me.. lol it works out well for us.

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Too many people spend money they haven't earned to buy things they don't want, to impress people they don't like. - Will Rogers

Honestly, I don't get it. I agree with refundsrus. I was a SAHM until the kids were in elementary school, then I got a job that was a little shorter than their school day and they hardly even knew I was working. I am a strong willed woman, and DH and I communicate well and make most decisions together. I have no idea what a "traditional woman" is. Times are changing. Why on earth do we have to comply to our parents and grandparents thoughts and actions...just to remain "traditional"?

Also, I feel strongly that we need to accept others for who they are and what they do/think. I see no reason to be judgmental, or accuse others of not being *right*...whatever that is.

I hope this makes sense, as I'm trying to make sense of something that doesn't make sense. LOL

I think Im an old fashioned mom, but of course I have modern ways about me too. like going out for drinks with my girlfriends on bunco nights etc.
But I like doing all of the laundry, dishes, meals, etc. It makes me feel like I am a nurturer. I love taking care of the people I love. In all honesty, do I get resentful sometimes that DH doesnt take out the garbage on time or staying with the kids without whining that he has important stuff to do. YES! And I usually blow my gasket once in a blue moon, he gets back on track with his "duties"
I am a bit envious that some womens husbands are really super active with the kids- thats my biggest complaint. That DH works so much that he gets home to not be able to reap the benifits of parenthood like I do

I dont care how traditional I feel I am, if my DH was doing something I didnt like from porn to cheating- drinking, whatever- he would get the boot from me before I let it drag me down! Im not one to keep my opinions to myself. I articulate them very well, and gratefully DH loves me enough to respect our way of life (or he'd get the BOOT)

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★♥Caroline★♥

lol if my husband chose to cheat on me i would leave. i know it may not be the traditional thing to do but i would have no choice. it would be his loss because i don't use ground turkey to make the meatballs. my bambinos will always be here for me as my oldest has come back from being in harms way. and i have my own money too from my ebay store, the extra is just for shopping fun and his way of saying he knows i work hard at home. i don't sit on these boards all day long, i have stuff to do^^

You don't???? hmmmm that's wierd

My hubby wishes I was a June Cleaver like my mom is. My mom waits on my dad hand and foot, makes his breakfast, iron his clothes, get him a snack, you name it. I think it was the era she grew up in and she does't think anything of it. I am the complete opposite, iron? right!

I tend to think I am the Trad-Mod wife..... I dont mind doing for my hubby at all,,, yes there are times, I want to say and I do..... get up do it yourself. I work a full time job, take care of the house and the kids, animals... Heck I even went to school full time too at one point..... but I dont take crap from any man, that was my first husband.... .I was a mouse meek as can be. I am now a trad-Mod woman!,,,, I dont take crap from anyone , and I will dish it out at times too. Thats why I am married now to a good man, he likes me fiesty. I dont get paid from him on Fridays, I get paid everyday !

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"Madison AnnMarie " 6/13/2008

http://s244.photobucket.com/albums/g...t=8652d1ea.pbr

http://s244.photobucket.com/albums/g...t=adbcb309.pbr

I consider myself a traditional mom. And in that, because of the way I was raised, I would never compromise myself.

Only you know what feels right, always go with your instincts.

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Catt
~ Mirror Mirror on the wall, I am my mother - after all! ~

I also consider myself pretty traditional but I am not gonna be stepped on either dh knows not to mess with me I will not allow him to drink beer in my house he can go out drinking with his friend but if he dont tell me & dont answer his cell I will find him & he knows it because it dont make me happy. And he knows I will not put up with alot of other stuff. I know to many women who will just shut up & take it & I am not one of them.

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mom of 3 greats girls

I'm not trying to start anything, but I don't understand this. Would you rather he go out drinking with his friends and possibly drive home drunk than have a beer at home?

I don't get it.

I don't have much to add. I just wanted to say Thanks for asking the question, Linnybop. I don't understand a lot of these recent posts either, so maybe this will clarify some things.

I was going to just ask the same thing.
I personally am far from being traditional. I was the quite "yes dear" wife with my ex-husband and took a lot of his crap woke up one day and said"not any more " I know some of you traditional wives may say "well that's why you are Divorced" and thats ok cause it has been said to me and you are entitled to your opinions.
Now, I told my BF he better not even get the slightest thought in his head that I am going to be the only one cleaning, cooking and doing laundry because if he is thinking that he is in for a shock I am responsible to care for 4 people.. me and my kids. Yes I will take care of my soon to be husband; however, I see my friends who are married who basically wait on their husbands and thats just not happening at my house. If we are watching TV and he looks at me and says "go get me a beer, snack etc" I am going to ask him if he is lost and give him directions to the kitchen. IMO there is a differnece between supporting/helping your SO and then being their submissive partner.

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~~~~**Maryann**~~~~

I just got a firm grip on reality....
Now I can strangle it

I am pretty sure that I'm not the traditional woman...LOL....but as far as fetching something for someone or making a meal or doing laundry....yeah, I'll do it, no problem. But I expect the same kindness and participation in return. That's how a family works, IMHO - traditional or not - it's about respect.

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

My Dh and kids both know that they can ask me for something and I will get it for them, but they also do the same for me and each other.....

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"You can never really pay back. You can only pay forward."

Wayne Woodrow “Woody” Hayes

O-H-I-O

This one confuses me, too. My DH and I are both adults...neither of us "allow" or "disallow" the other to do anything. It's called mutual respect. Isn't it his house, too?

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

I must be the farthest thing from traditional and it's fine with me! My mom was my dad's personal sevant...and the kids too if we wanted something. That's not for me. Our family is a team. We think of each other and if someone's going to the kitchen we ask if anyone needs anything. We both have jobs...I make significantly more than him but it's our money. My husband doesn't need my permission to do anything but he checks with me first...just as I check with him. Thanks God I was born when I was...I would have made a miserable June Clever!

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Mom to Miss C & Mr. E
Former SAHM now working full time
feboll@neo.rr.com

I don't mind doing the "traditional wife" things but I'm lucky enough to have a husband who doesn't mind doing them either.

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"Never loan your car to someone you have given birth too"