I just co-hosted a baby shower for my best friends room mate. She is a single mom (in her late 20s) this is her first child and her sisters were NOT going to front the cost to have one. I am all about cutting corners and finding the best deal so I found out our local pizza hut had two "party rooms" one that could hold 35 and one that could hold 100 they reserved free. Well, we sent out the babies r us free invites (we had to hand write these and the computer age has made me very weak with handwriting) and invited around 80 people. All the invitations said RSVP. Well, the weekend of the shower we ordered the cake for 35 people, we received 15 actual call-back invitations that people said they were coming so with the three of us, mom, best friend, and me that was 18 and maybe a few stragglers here and there...we were expecting around 25 people to show up...that's a nice party right there! Anyway, we told ph we would take the smaller room. Around 2:55 people started piling in...and by 3:20, we had well over 70 people crammed into this tiny room. Our food budget was $100 we were buying the new mia pizzas and paying for the drinks at $2.25 a glass...we obviously went over. Well, all her sisters are vegetarians so even though we ordered cheese and veggie pizzas, they hit the salad bar...so about 20 people followed. We made the waitress make an announcement (cause that way they could be mad at her and not us tehehehe) that the salad bar was not included in the cost of the party so please see the cashier to pay for the salad bar (it was like $3 something a person). Then as we were cutting the cake, my bf said since we didn't get RSVPs from the majority of you, the cake only feeds 35 so raise your hand if you want a piece of cake.

Oh and then we did the address the envelope thing and the baby is now a month old...still no thank yous lol.

So with all that said my pet peeve for wedding AND baby showers even actual weddings is people who don't RSVP...that is what it's there for people! Don't be rude just give the party person a call...it helps when the food bill comes around and to plan for the cake. Even if you are not coming.

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I have heard that people have trouble getting RSVPs out of people for expensive sit down dinners---so I just don't get it. It seems like good guests get invited to tacky pay for your own events and lousy guests get the invites to the quality events

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Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.

E. Roosevelt

My pet peeve is when my sister in laws have baby showers for all of their babies. I just got an invitation to another shower for one of them and it's her 3rd baby and another boy. She already has 2 boys what more could she possibly need. You would die if you saw what she registered for even another crib her youngest is4 and out of the old crib.

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cmemaloy@yahoo.com


I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not.

Life! is a coin. You can spend it anyway you wish, but you can only spend it once.

This would really be for any party - NOT RSVP'ing! That just gets me. I don't understand why people don't RSVP. I put my phone number AND my email address, trying to make it as easy as possible for people.

We had a birthday party for my daughter's 10th in December We got 3 RSVP's through my daughter from the child at school, which, of course, you can't totally count on. 2 of those 3 didn't come. There were a couple who called to say they couldn't make it and a few who called to say they would. There were one or two who came but hadn't called.
The party was at a skating rink and I had to give them a guest list at least a day before the party (I asked for an RSVP by 2 days before the party). So, we ended up paying for I think it was 10 and had about 7 (including our other 2 kids) show up.

I also don't get the baby showers for multiple kids. I could understand if there was a big gap between the kids...like we have a 10 year old and then our happy surprise who's 4 now. But we didn't end up having a baby shower for the second one even though we had finally decided to get rid of all the baby stuff about a year before.
My stepdaughter's mother had her fifth child (girl) about 5 months ago and she had a baby shower. Huh?! And she has a 2yr old girl and 4yr old boy so you know she already has stuff.

peapie

I also have issues with people not RSVP'ing.......I know if I receive an invite with an RSVP, I let them know even if I'm not going, so they know for sure.....and if I don't know I will be able to attend for sure I always let them know that I'm unsure.....and get back to them before the event. Most who know me, know that things pop up in my life, and are understanding with that.

I also have issues when I'm sent an invite that tells me I'm to send them money, to help pay for the present they want to get......

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Nicole

My mom called my and told me about a baby shower she had been invited to. On the invitation there was a cute little poem from the unborn baby. The gist of the poem was that the family couldn't afford an epidural for the mom and so that baby was asking for the guests to bring money and tie it to the 'epidural' tree that would be at the shower. I could not believe that this family had the kahunas to ask for this! I would have been TOTALLY embarassed if I were the mom-to-be. She obviously wasn't. She thought it was a great idea!

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Ü Ü

The multiple shower thing annoys me especially because I never had any baby shower! I oldest dd was born 5 weeks early...on the day my baby shower was scheduled. Then no one did one for my 2nd dd because you only did them for the 1st.

Not sending thank yous is another one. I gave my best friend a wedding shower for her 1st wedding (she's now divorced for the 4th time!). She never did send out thank yous. People would ask me about it for months afterwards. Heck, I don't know...I just gave the shower! Drove me crazy!

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

I have several.........

No RSVP
No thank-yous
People that expect to be fed a meal at every party. Why is that? Why must social functions center around a full blown meal? That's expensive! What happened to showers and receptions that serve drinks and cake?
I believe every baby should be celebrated. It's not all about the gifts although nowadays most seem to think so. Even a diaper and baby wipes shower for the second, third, fourth child isn't asking too much IMHO. I had three very good showers for my first baby, a girl. However, no shower for my second, a boy. A little help with boy clothing would have been nice.

I think the thing about weddings, showers and house warmings that bother me the most is getting invites that are obvious "GIMMEEs".

I love it when a close, dear or longtime friend sends an invite to join in celebrating a special occasion.

But it seems like lately I am given an invite to showers, weddings and whatnots from people that might not even qualify as an aquaintance. The last one came from a girl, that to the best of my recollection, we one time shared a table (that seats 10) in the cafeteria at work.
I guess the feeling I have been getting lately is "I don't know you or really like you but will accept a gift from you." In other words GIMMEE something.

Whoo, thanks for the space to vent

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Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass
It's about learning to dance in the rain.

I second and third the no RSVP..how very rude and thoughtless !

I guess my pet peeve is, when the mom to be starts to talk about when her "relations" with her dh will resume after giving birth...blech blech blech..yes, I had attended a party where this was discussed.

I also do not appreciate when the person does not send thank you cards. I have never gotten a thank you card , ever.

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Live, Love, Laugh

I really don't mind the multiple baby showers. A baby shower is suppose to be the celebration of a new baby and the party is for the new baby. Why should only the first born get a celebration party and not the 2nd, 3rd, etc? It's not fair for the rest of the babies to not get a party because they were not born first.

Maybe it's only me, but I don't consider the shower to be for the new baby at all. I think it's to help out the new mother.

My take on it is that the babies will all have their celebrations (hopefully given by their parents, not the people throwing the showers) when they have Christenings, 1st birthday parties, etc.

I feel that ONE shower is plenty to start out a new mom. If she has more than that, she's lucky, but it shouldn't be expected. Any "party for the new baby" should be given once the baby has arrived, so that (s)he can actually enjoy it.

Well... I thought it was kind of tacky when we had a Grandma shower (when the woman already has grandkids). Everyone was asked to bring in things for when the baby stays at her house.

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AKA: Airbornearmywife

I have never heard of a "Grandma Shower." Please do not let my mom know about them-- she will do anything for something free.

As far as baby showers for non-first born-- We had a "welcome Baby" party for our sec. and requested "no gifts." We also plan to have a "Welcome to the family" party for our adopted baby as soon as the adoption is final. We are requesting no gifts for this one too.

People not RSVPing drives me nuts. And if you RSVP saying you will be there and can't make it- please call and tell me. I often wait for kids I know are supposed to show.

Wow. This one takes the cake.

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I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

I also think that baby showers for 2nd 3rd, etc. is not to "welcome the baby" as much as it is to "get something." We are having our 4th. A boy, and we already have a boy, he will be 7 and then 2 girls in between. I've saved my things from when my son was little, and I'm not expecting others to supply me with the essentials. Now on the other hand, a friend is also having her 4th, but it's a girl, and she has 3 boys. I think in that situation it's perfectly fine for a baby shower...

I don't like when someone asks you to go in on a shower, and you really aren't THAT great of friends with the Mom to be, or the Bride to be anyway, and then they really don't even include you in the planning. Clearly just looking for someone to foot part of the bill.

I had 2 showers, but, there was a 7 year gap between babies. I had gotten rid of most of the clothes, and the play pen, high chair, etc. I did not EXPECT one, but, some dear friends of mine threw it for me.

I would like a Thank you note, but, if not, the Thank you at the shower is enough.

Also, the showers for people that don't even live near you.....WTH??? I'm talking STATES away.

Oh well......I guess you can't please all the people all the time.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

My pet peeve is having to address my own envelope for the thank you note while at the shower. So rude. And please don't tell me that the guest of honor is just so busy that she doesn't have time to address all the envelopes. Hogwash. Everyone is busy. I took time out of my busy day to shop for an appropriate gift, wrap it nicely, and spend a few hours on a weekend to attend your party. I think you can take the time to address an envelope.

(Actually, now I just politely decline to do it if asked.)

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Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

This happened years ago but is such a breach in etiquette it still makes me shake my head. I was invited to a bridal shower. Not so strange except everyone invited to this shower was NOT invited to the wedding. I guess it was some type of consulation party? You aren't good enough to be invited to the wedding/reception but are good enough to buy me a gift? I worked with the groom and apparently the bride drastically edited his guest list, hence the "special shower" for those that didn't make the cut.

I didn't go. I actually remember it as being an empowering occurrence. I realized I was an adult and I didn't want to go to this party, so I didn't have to go.

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Raising my baby RIGHT!!!!!!

All the cool babies are wearing cloth!