I thought these were comical


One Sunday in a Midwest city a young child was "acting up" during
the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain
some sense of order in the pew but were losing the battle. Finally
the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the
aisle on his way out. Just before reaching the safety of the
foyer the little one called loudly to the congregation,
"Pray for me! Pray for me!"


A daddy was listening to his child say his prayer "Dear Harold".
At this, dad interrupted and said, "Wait a minute, How come you
called God, "Harold"? The little boy looked up and said, "That's
what they call Him in chruch, You know the prayer we say,
"Our Father, who art in Heaven, Harold be Thy name."


During the minister's prayer one Sunday, there was a loud whistle
from one of the back pews. Gary's mother was horrified. She pinched
him into silence, and after church, asked: "Gary, whatever made
you do such a thing?" Gary answered soberly: "I asked God to teach
me to whistle... And He just then did!"


A little boy's prayer. "Dear God, please take care of my daddy,
mommy, sister, brother, my doggy and me. Oh, please take care of
yourself, God. If anything happens to you, we're gonna be in a big mess."


A rabbi said to a precocious six-year-old boy: "So your mother says
your prayers for you each night? Very commendable. What does
she say?" The little boy replied, "Thank God he's in bed!"


A little boy was overheard praying: "Lord, if You can't make me a
better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am!"

I heard one from my four year old last night....

He was saying prayers at the dinner table as normal...and then tags on to the end, I pray that I can see mommy scream and cry when the baby comes...Amen. Dad asks first, as both of us are stunned he knows this first of all and second why a kid would want that...So answers our son, so that I can prove I am not the naughist.

(We found out after dinner a friend from preschool had given our son a little more information on the whole birth thing than we had planned on him knowing, he was recently there to witness the birth of his brother.)

Not so much a prayer, but a plea.

My dd was acting up really bad and sitting on the far side of her dad out of my reach. He tried everything to reason with her and I finally had enough. I reached over and grabbed her up and started walking out of the church down the center aisle. Everyone was staring at us terribly and she yells very loudly "you can't spank me in church." I get outside with her and realize that when I picked her up I also had caught her dress up in my arm and was showing the whole church her bright fuschia pink panties. We learned that day that it is far better to sit in the last pew.