She told me the other day she wanted to get it pierced for her birthday which is in Nov. and she will be 15, I said I would think about it! I guess there are other places she could have asked to get done....BLAH, I dont know if I should or not! Would you let your 15 year old?

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gail

OK...Is this a battle you really want to fight?

Piercings (for the most part) holes will close up if not used. She's 15--she's probably got the cute little body that belly button piercing were made for. The piercing can be hidden when needed (going to see grandma, school/academic activities, church).

Ask yourself--what happens if you don't agree and make the arrangements at a clean/sanitary place? Is she the kind of child who would go behind your back and do it anyway? If yes, then she runs the risk of infection or disfigurement.
And besides, this gives you the chance to be the "cool" mom! LOL
You're daughter will remember this forever!

A co-worker just recently allowed her 17 y/o DS to get a tattoo (on his back). All for the reasons I mentioned above.

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

I agree with Marilynk - it's not a battle I would fight. It will probably look cute, and when it doesn't anymore, it will close up. Now, a tatoo - that would be another matter...

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Mom to 3 - one with 2 legs and 2with 4!

I let my daughter get hers done when she was in high school - cant remember how old she was. I decided that there were definately worse places for her to pierce. I was glad I went with her to have it done - the guy was kind of slimy but I made sure my presence was known!.

by telling her OK, at least you can make sure she takes care of it - her friend has hers done and it got really infected.

My daughter is now 23 and her fiance doesnt like the piercing so she let it grow shut.

Anyway - I would say let her do it!!

My dd who is 14 almost 15 wanted to get hers done for her 14th bday, however she has diabetes and the doc said that is the toughest piercing to heal. I was gonna let her. So now I think she will be getting her nose pierce. I dont think its a big deal either considering how much other stuff out there that she could ask for.

steph

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I agree with everyone above.
Things like hair length and hair color and piercings are temporary exciting things and ways they can feel some freedom (but it is not permanent).
My daughter got her belly button pierced at that age. In NY you must have parental consent with forms and I had to show my driver's license even because she was underage. We chose a clean well-recommended place and I was with her.
The piercing is hidden most of the time (really only seen in the summer in a bathing suit).

Several of her school friends would pierce themselves (lip, tongue, etc.) and got lots of infections.
My nieces got eyebrow and nose and lip piercings (different people, different piercings, lol). They found it a problem at their jobs and had to wear little bandages. Now that they are older and have taken them out, there are some small scars that they aren't thrilled with.

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I wouldn't let her it but I don't have daughters. I do believe in picking your battles however I think this is one I would say no to. I don't like all the piercings people do especially when they aren't yet adults. That's what I tell my sons-no piercings, etc... until you are 18.

I say let her do it. I would let my daughter (or son for that matter). Piercings aren't permanent. The scars they leave may be (depends on the area you pierce). Heck, if *I* had the belly for it, I would get a piercing (DH thinks it would look good just the way I am but I don't think so). I wouldn't allow a tat or anything permanent until they are 18 and even then, we would like them to think about how that will look when you are 40 or 60 or 80...will it still be cool and what you want?

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

Personally I think belly piercings are trashy. I would make her wait until she's 18 and then if she still wants to do it ...have at it.

Now my oldest DD has three tattoos. I also think that they are trashy, but she's an adult now and thank God they are in places that the general public can't see and they are very small.

I agree with pick your battles, but my rule is that any permanent markings or piercings other than earlobes must wait until they are 18.

no I wouldnt. She can when she's older, I have four boys and that's one of the rules. though I dont think any of them would ask for one anyway. they can punch holes in themselves when their more adult. piercings dont bother me I talk to a guy that works in a bookstore that has big circles of wood in his ears and earrings in his eyebrows, nose lips and probably other places too. that's fine just need to be more grown up than 15

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If it were my daughter, I would not allow her to do it at that age. When they are 18 they can make those kinds of decisons. I do pick my battles with my kids but there are just some things, I don't believe they need to be doing.

I would not let her. I have 2 dds and the rule is they can have pierced ears up to 2 on each side in the lobes. One daughter has 1, the other has none. Any other piercings or tattos are after they are 18 and out of my house. I don't like body piercings (other than ears) and I don't like tattoos. Neither does DH & luckily, so far, neither do they.

I had a friend with a 16 yo son who worked in food preparation. He decided to get his lip pierced and was immediately fired for it.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

My DD was 14 when I let her.

No way to tatoos until kids are 18 - and until then they'll hear my reasons why I'm against them.

I like the idea of up to 2 piercings per earlobe while under 18, Lisab! I think I'll adopt that one.

My daughter will be 18 in May

I allowed her to get it done for her 15th birthday also.

You have to pick your battles - and I figured this one isn't something that I wanted to battle over.
I love belly rings and wish I could get one (if I had a flatter stomach....lol)

I also allowed her (at 15 or 16) to get highlights......she has beautiful brown hair and she had carmel color put in. Came out very nice

Next, she wants a very small tattoo (when she is 18)

**Some may say that we shouldn't allow things at such young ages.....but the way I see it: if she is a good kid and doesn't drink or do drugs, does well in school, etc....... then I don't have a problem with it.

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MyCoupons Is #1 for Holiday Shopping

I would say let her do it. It could be worse! Now if it was a tongue piercing, I'd say no. But like others have said, you have to pick your battles.

Just make sure it's a reputable place and clean place and tell her she's responsible to make sure it doesn't get infected. Maybe have a girls' day out and take a few of her friends and buy them lunch after the piercing.

I really like belly button piercings. I think they are very attractive in the right body. As long as you go with her and make sure it's safe, sterile and she keeps it clean till it heals, then I would probably let her do it.

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Mary

No. To answer your only question, no. Now to offer my thoughts.....you have to decide who is the parent, you or a 14 year old. This now, what next? You aren't supposed to be her best friend, you are to be her mother/father and raise her.

Not picking on anyone who used the cliche, but I can't stand the "pick your battles". Why is it a battle? It's not a battle, it's a parenting decision, not a teenager's decision. The easy way out of this is to let it happen instead of being the parent and making a firm decision that may not be popular.

dl

No, I would not. I think belly button piercings are very "sexual" and that is not something I want my 15yo DD doing. Girls, IMO, are already trying to be "sexy" WAYYYYYY too young. My DD wants to dye her hair....nope, not allowing that right now, either. What is there to look forward to??? Most of these young girls parade around with cleavage hanging out, and a body they really don't know the full power of.

As parents we have to set clear and firm rules, and stick to them. It isn't always easy, I know.....just last night I had to battle DD over the size of her pants . Guess who won that one? The Mom I think a lot of times it's easier to give in than to stand your ground. We don't want our kids to dislike us, now, do we??

I realize each person has their own parenting style and set of morals and standards. But, in our house there would be no navel piercing on DD at 15.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

Maybe pick your battles is not necessarily the best choice of words--maybe "don't sweat the small stuff" would be better. If, in the parent's opinion piercing the belly button is "small stuff" then they should allow it. If, the parent feels strongly about piercing then of course they should stand on their principles.

Luckily, most piercings will close up if the stud/post is removed.

And as to tattoos--I waited until I was 35 to get my first one (I have two, and plans for more). I would rather my kids wait until they are much older to get theirs (should they choose to.)
However, when my niece was 16 she got her first tattoo. She got a memorial tattoo for her uncle who she was very close to and meant the world to her--she had watched him battle cancer and eventually die from it. That tattoo gave her a sense of closure to his death, and it is very important to her.

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

The rule at my house is certain piercing (nose, belly, ears) are fine, tats you gotta wait til your 18, this is for both my dd and ds. I really cant see my ds wanting a piercing but if he wants one I'd take him to get it done. As far as dying and highlighting hair, my dd has done that for a long time. Its no big deal b/c when you get tired of the highlights you just dye it another color or go back to your original color. If my dd was wild or out partying or drinking and using drugs and stuff like that then nothing would be allowed. But she really has a good head on her shoulders so its no big deal to me.

steph

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That's an interesting perspective. I hadn't really thought of that. I see no sexuality in piercings (other than a Prince Albert or similar and that's a TOTALLY different thing!). I don't see a naval piercing as "sexy". Thanks for sharing your outlook...like I said, I hadn't thought of it that way

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

I would let her do it, jsut cuz she gets that done doesnt mean she will turn to the dark side.

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I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it

I would say let her do it.

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Brenda

GO #24 JEFF GORDON

Well-presented.

I agree with you. By most people's standards, DH and I choose to delay even the smallest milestones for the very reason you stated - too much, too soon, and leaving nothing to look forward to.

It is HARD to find clothes for my tween that are cool and trendy, yet not sexy or too revealing. That should NOT be a problem at this age!

I totally agree.

Most girls will admit that that is why they want their belly buttons pierced: it's "sexy".

I went thru the same thing with my DD and told her flat out No......I gave her my reasons and told her when she's 18 she would be old enough to make that decision herself. But far as getting a tattoo she would have to wait until she moved out of the house.

Here is what I experience with my DD

At 15 my DD wanted her belly button & tongue pierced .....When she was 16 she wanted a tattoo on her ankle that resemble a bracelet.

She is almost 21 now & has NOT had any of the above done to her body. If she ever did it now I would be OK with it because she is a adult.

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Angels may not come when you call them, but they'll always be there when you need them.

DS is 17, last year he wanted a lip piercing, i told him when he was 18 go for it, he has since changed his mind. He also wanted a tattoo, same rules. I dont see anything wrong with having them wait. I asked him about the belly piercing on girls in his school.. he said that the perception is they are easy.. I'm so glad i'm not in high school anymore..

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"Never loan your car to someone you have given birth too"

For those that don't think a belly button piercing is OK, I ask why. allinaugust stated she thought it was sexual. So for her I understand why she would say no. Do all y'all feel that way?

I could understand why you would nix a lip ring, nose or eyebrow piercing if you thought they were unattractive. But how is getting a belly button pierced wrong for a 15 yr old?

Most would let their daughter get their ears pierced, right? Why? because it makes them feel better about themselves, makes them feel pretty with earrings. I feel the same way about the belly button piercing.

One thing you need to think about is, will the girl take a pin, ice cube, and cork and try to have a friend do at some sleepover? That would be a hundred times worse.

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Mary

And remember by and large navel piercings are NOT permanent! Once you remove the ring, and leave it out the hole closes up. I fully understand "NO" on tattoos as no matter where you put them--they are permanent.

And secondly, navel rings aren't readily visible. I fully understand nixing piercings that are visible.

But, we all parent differently. We have different ideas of "acceptable" and "not acceptable". And, I understand and agree with being the parent, setting limits, making rules--and if this were something I was vehemently opposed to or thought would harm my child, I would say NO as well.

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

I echo the feelings of allinaugust - too sexual an image/message for someone so young and naive to send out. Another poster said that her son considers girls who wear bellybutton rings easy. Definitely not an image I would want for my daughter as a minor.

like the boys opinion it's viewed as being easy. there's too much teen sex as it is. I go out and see teen boobage, thongs hanging out of their pants, shirts/jeans skin tight <it's like watching the adult man put on a teeny shirt the other day on the asian variety channel I'm wondering if they have to shimmy and shake to get into their clothes too hehhe>. Raging teen hormones. girls want respect but I think for the guys side of things it's like dangling candy in front of a kid and smacking his hand if they try to touch it

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Uh, no, I would never expect my daughter to defy me by going behind my back to do such a thing.

Well if she wants to hear from the voice of experience I recommend against it. I am almost 50 and I hate all my tattoos and almost hate my piercings. NO you CANNOT take them out and expect your skin to grow back expecially in that area. I have a hole in my nose that is small so it's not that obvious. I have had my piercing in my private area removed. I keep my belly button ring because nobody can see it the same with my nipple rings. I wish I did not have them either you can't take them out or there will be a big hole in each nipple.

You cannot permanently alter your body at a young age. You WILL change your mind. Imagine picking a hairdo or outfit as a teenager and having to wear it the rest of your life.

For gooness sake some of us don't even like the same music we did back then. Don't disfigure your body based on the current style.

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

And, what about these huge plug things the guys are sporting?? how is THAT hole going to close??? I'm SOOOOOO thankful my kids aren't into this stuff.

We went to a function tonite, the dress for the students was "business formal"....HOLY SMOKES....I guess that would be business formal for the ones persuing the "lady of the evening" profession. I just think it's too much too soon.

Oh, and if my DD decided to defy DH and my rules, and get this done by a friend with a cork, she knows there would be hell to pay when we found out about it.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I don't think anyone expects their child to defy them (well, ok, I'm sure some parents do, but generally speaking)!

When I was15-16 the big thing was to have two holes in one ear--and I sat and watch 3 friends pierce their own ears in the locker room after PE one day They wanted to my ear--but I was too much of chicken when it came to pain--I've since gotten over that But these girls parents would have never thought they would have done it either.

But, again, it's just different parenting styles, choices and principles. Doesn't mean any of us are wrong (or right for that matter!) For the most part I think that we're all just trying to do the best we can to get our kids to adulthood without too much permanent damage

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Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

I would consider tongue and belly piercings rather sexual, though one in more of a literal sense than the other. I guess I'd expect to see a belly piercing on a stripper, or on an adult woman who treats it like a naughty secret. That sounds pretty prudish, but it's the association they have for me.

That aside, a navel piercing isn't exactly the cleanest type you can get. It's part of the body that collects sweat, dead skin, and bacteria, and one that bends a lot, none of which make healing easy. Pants are lower than they used to be, which would probably help, but I've known a lot of people who have tried this piercing, and given up on it.

The sexual connotation is there. Once they get it pierced do you think they are going to want to cover it up? Hell to the No! They are gonna show it off. They may leave the house with it covered, but when they get to the mall, movies, etc with friends you better believe that the top is pulled up and tied in the back to best optimize the viewing of the piercing and its new jewelery so that everyone can see it. I see it all the time out and about.

My dd is now 19 and got her belly button piereced at 16. She likes it still. And as to the poster who asks if they are gonna cover it up. Yep she always kept hers covered except when going swimming and wearing a bikini.
I also have extreme issues if a boy thinks just b/c a girl has her belly piereced she is easy. What kind of parents raised this child? That is stupid. It is like saying if a girl wears a mini skirt and she gets raped it is her fault.
Anyway, my dd and 3 of her friends all went to get thier's done at the same time at a place that us mothers all checked out very carefully. None of them had any problems and they all still have them almost 4 years later and love them. DD also has another friend whose mother said no way she would not let her. Well she decided to do it on her own b/c all the other girls had it done. Well it got terribly infected and she was afraid to tell her mom b/c her mom would be mad b/c she done it. Her belly button is deformed now and it really looks nasty. She blames her mom now for the way she looks b/c if her mom would of just let her go with the other girls she feels that this would not have happened.
Even though she knows she done this to herself she feels it was trivial of her mom to make such a big deal over something so small. And if she wasn't afraid of her mom she might of been able to go to her to get to the doctor. the other mothers did not even find out about her belly button till several months later b/c she was afraid we would tell her mom.
Pick your battles and this one is really minor. dont sweat the small stuff. Just make sure the place she gets it done is reputable and keep an eye on the piercing to make sure she is taking care of it and there is no infection.

This is the path to fornication.

Was anyone else just WAITING for this person to make this comment

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

Me, Me, Me!

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Mary

I was!!!! I'm surprised it took as long as it did!!

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Friends are like butt cheeks.
Crap might separate them,
But they always come back together.

Hmmm......it's Friday night.....I'm in the mood for some good ole fornication....maybe I should go get my belly button pierced so that I can get some! LMAO!

cj/
(and yes, I'm just kidding!)

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

Stop! Stop! (ROTFL)

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I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

If you're using your belly button, well, you're probably long overdue for The Talk , , .

ROFL DH yelling around the corner wondering what I'm laughing at

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ROFLOL babyblue. good one.


My dh and I were just laughing over this. Our daughters will NEVER ask for this. They start crying and shaking when it's time to take off a bandaide. Much less a needle through their belly buttons.

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"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God? " ~Epicurus

Glad that you are all ROFL....but was PUM that made the connection between bellybuttons and fornication though....she is the funny one!

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

And to think, people have been "having relations" for thousands of years - all without belly button piercings!

How EVER did we manage?

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