Well DH has to have surgery

itscc2u · #1 (**permalink**) 04-24-2008, 05:19 PM

Got the news yesterday and spent most of yesterday crying and really mad at him. He has to have neck fusion surgery because the epidural steroid injections did not work and he basically blew the C5-C6 disk last week when we heard the loud pop.

Why am I mad at him because as the neurosurgeon told him ever so bluntly with me in the room he has did this to himself. How because he refuses to quit smoking, smoking and degenerative disk disease have been link in more than one study over the years and hsaid it doesnt matter if he is only down to 3-5 a day on Chantix (which he should be smoking none now per the Chantix website) he is going to be back in this same situation in a year or two because he has been smoking since he was about 13 years old and no that is not a typo he started smoking at 13 and his parents knew so he been smoking for almost 32 years. He has COPD/Emphysema and sleep apnea nad snores like a diesel engine but that doesnt seem to stop him from ruining his body and yes I have a lot of room to talk considering I was going to not undergo treatment for lupus anti-coagulant factor, but he just doesnt seem to care that this is a problem.

The surgery recovery time is 6 months which places well out of FMLA and into Christmas time to go job hunting and they are not guaranteeing the surgery is going to work. I sat down and tried to work the bills and the budget with his small disability check which will be about $160 after we pay health insurance and we will have to somehow pay Doctors visits, food, medication, gas and other necessities like shampoo , tp etc on $79 a month, you tell me how to do that? I cant and I still cant believe these people at social services say we dont qualify for food stamps but yet Stefan qualifies for free lunch. I even pulled the federal rules they have to go by for disabled people and it doesnt seem to phase them what it says I just cant do this. I am going to have to give up much needed medication or our only source of transportation which we just bought in November when the tranny went out on my windstar and I couldnt get disability insurance on it. My mom has helped all she can at 85 years old she helped me get the new vehicle with the downpayment and has heped pay some of this months bills, DH's family is well worthless . My oldest son Thumper is on SSDI and struggling himself needing food etc and we cant help him I hate going to the food bank weekly but I guess I have no choice.

I woudl love to find a job like I just left at H&R Block 2 days per week so I dont lose my SSDI but there is nothing out there. I have talked to several temp agencies and they want FT temp to perm although I am registered and am listed as available for same day jobs everyday the last 3 weeks I have had Dr's appointments and not available and next week 3 days with Dr's visits.

I know God isnt supposed to give me more than I can handle but he has given me an all you can eat buffet. I have checked into some work at home stuff but nothing I find seems like I can fit it in my schedule or I would need to invest in a second phone line and equipment to start and I just cant afford to do it. I am doing so many PTC and PTR rewards type programs I have filled up a full page on a spreadsheet to keep track of them and I just cant seem to make money at them gosh I miss the old days of $100 a month.

Surgery is May6th so if you all can pray for DH I woudl appreciate it, I am just not sure what I am going to do with him home 3-6 months I am sure he will drive me up the wall.

marilynk · #2 (**permalink**) 04-24-2008, 06:17 PM

They are going to actually do the surgery with him still smoking? Most Neurosurgeons and Orthopedic surgeons will not do any kind of surgery until the patient has been smoke free for at least 4 weeks.

And your surgeon is right the healing time/recovery time rises while the success rate drops dramatically for smokers.

I have never heard of the recovery time being 6 months--I think that is the longest I have ever heard.
I hope all goes well for you guys.

itscc2u · #3 (**permalink**) 04-24-2008, 07:01 PM

Marilyn~ I had the surgeyr in 2002 at C6-C7 and it took a full year and half to heal and then again I have lupus and had a few complications like DS putting baby oil on the bathroom floor me not seeing it and I fell and cracked the fusion. We used cadaver bone to do the fusion on me they are doing metal plate on him and he quoted 6 months based on the type of jobs DH does normally and the fact he smokes and refuses to quit and he was told no smoking between now and surgery and I havent seen him light up today but no guarantee he didnt when I was out at the Doctors and food bank.

Carljc · #4 (**permalink**) 04-25-2008, 08:56 AM

Hi,
Sorry for all you are going through...we , or should I say my husband had 2 discs replaced, with donor bone and 2 plates, screws, etc..fusion. 2 years ago. ( He is a non-smoker) He was out of work a month, but he felt better before that. The first week was slow, but he felt pretty good by the end of the month. After that, the neurosurgeon (Hospital of the University of Pennsylvania) said he could do whatever he wanted, no restrictions. He worked out, although lower than what he was doing before at my insistence.
The medical bills were abit rough, but I called and had the billing dept. let me pay monthly on it. I just finished it up recently, not too bad..But I know where you are coming from.
Money was tight for the first few months, and I usually do coupons anyway, but we ate a lot of pasta. One of his co-workers said, boy you guys eat a lot of carbs,.....It was all we could afford for a while. But it worked. It somehow all came out okay.
You will be okay , too. The food bank is there to help, take advantage of the service it provides. Also, maybe your church? Food stamps?
Hang in there. My husband never smoked, never had an accident, etc...and the insurance company called and wanted to know who the other driver was? I said what? no accident, nothing. Just bad genetics. So your husband might not have helped his situation any, but it might not be all his "fault'.
Take care

Julieoh0712 · #5 (**permalink**) 04-25-2008, 09:05 AM

My thoughts are with you...
My mom never smoked or drank and ended up with the same surgery. Her recovery time was 9 months. She just didnt bounce back like she should have.
Good luck to you.

jm19 · #6 (**permalink**) 04-25-2008, 12:10 PM

Christine,
I will definitly pray for you and your DH.
Are there any coupons that I could send you?
Anything else I could do?
PM me if I can help!
Sharon

AMulquin · #7 (**permalink**) 04-26-2008, 04:52 AM

Best wishes to your husband.

itscc2u · #8 (**permalink**) 04-26-2008, 08:28 AM

Theres a update under the Title Well DH was fired.

DH is not going to have surgery now and well its all in that thread

Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Switch to Hybrid Mode Switch to Threaded Mode