I hate doing them, I even hate when my kid gets one!
I refuse to do them anymore.

I mean, my dd turns 7 Thursday and her party is Saturday. We are having a bowling party so everyone bowls for 1.5 hours and then gets cake and ice cream.
I am not making up goody bags for the kids to take home.
I'm already spending over $100 on the party at the bowling alley alone.

Do you think that's wrong? What's your opinion?

NO, I don't think it's wrong. Good for you for deciding not to do them. I always thought of them as a sort of bribe or gift to the person for even coming. Shouldn't the party itself be enough???

I wouldn't be surprised if at least one kid doesn't ask where there goody bag is, before leaving.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

When I was a kid, how grand it was to have a cake made and decorated by mom and a few gifts to open. Times have changed.

Good for you, OP, for holding the line.

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To hell with the goody bags! If you are doing all that work and spending all that money then I would say it isn't necessary.

We often go to parties where there are no goodie bags. The kids never miss them, either! I have not done goodie bags in a long time, but if we have a home party and they make a craft, then that IS their "goody bag" as far as I'm concerned. No complaints from the kids.

Often, if you go bowling, the bowling alley here gives out their own goodie bag, which includes a coupon for a future bowling session. It might be interesting to ask if they do that where you're having yours.

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"The errors of faith are better than the best thoughts of unbelief." - Thomas Russell

I like giving them and don't mind at all when my kids receive them.

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My soon-to-be 6th grader just got home from a bowling/laser tag party about an hour ago and she had one. I hate doing them, and I hate when they bring them home with whistles (as she just did) but the kids love them. I just do cute little inexpensive things.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
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I hate them. Most stuff in them are junk that ends up in the garbage. I usually put in useful stuff like mini notebooks, erasers, fruit snacks, etc.

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I've never lied to you. I've always told you some version the of truth.

I actually enjoy putting them together. I get really cool stuff clearanced from Target or back to school stuff from the office supply stores. You can do a lot for very little if you look around.

I didn't do goody bags per se, I would buy some nice but relatively inexpensive thing as a single "goody," like the small nerf planes or the floam stuff when that was popular. I agree that most goody bags have a bunch of junk that just gets tossed.

I certainly don't think you need to do one at all.

For my daughters birthday the last few years we have done a rob your neighbor party. The kids have loved it! We start out with three wrapped gifts (usually spend a few dollars a gift). I buy all the gifts for the party. All the kids have a set of dice, when they roll seven they get to pick a wrapped gift from the middle of the table, when all the gifts are gone from the middle of the table they move on to round two, which consists of *robbing* a wrapped gift from someone when you roll a seven. At the end of round two, they unwrap the gifts...on round three they *rob* once again, only this time they know what all the gifts are. Round two and three are timed, usually 20 minutes a round. You can't take a gift from someone if its their last gift. The kids go home with whatever they have when the last round ends. I also have a *special* gift for whoever has the least amount of gifts. Everyone goes home with at least two gifts. The girls all asked my daughter if she would do it again next year for her birthday. They all had a great time!

I do agree that they have become "mainstream" but really is just a bag of very cheap trinkets. I liked what above poster said about a parting gift of "one " thing. Really, does there have to be a parting gift?


Don't be surprised if a kid or two actually asks you where their goody bag is as they are leaving!

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I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it!

I use to like to make them up for the kids, I know my kids use to look forward to seeing what was in them.

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Proud mom to 4 great boys Anthony20,Nicholas16,Michael4,Sean2

I don't do them. I figure I am paying for the bowling or swimming or gymnastic or whatever we are doing that year. Why should I have to spend even more money to do bags...

I did do them when they were still in preschool. But that was as far as I went with them.

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We do them and also enjoy receiving them.

Perhaps it's because my mom did them for me (candy in a ziploc) and I remember my friends loving them that I do them for my children. Like a few previous posters mentioned, I find the stuff cheap at Target and use coupons for the rest. For example, my son will have $.25 Spiderman crayons, Band-Aids(Spiderman), Spiderman Fruit snacks, and some Play-Doh in the goody bags to give to his friends. Combined cost, less than a buck. Each of my SIL's also do wonferful bags where the bag is useful. My daughter still has her Hannah Montana purse from a Jan. party. For a 4yr. old, that's quite an accomplishment

I can't stand the goodie bags my dd comes home with. All cheap Junk! Ugh!

We did a pool party once 3 weeks before dd's b-day and it was still hot. So, we bought noodles for each kid as they were only a buck. We did $1 googles as well on sale. Not a lot of kids so we could. The kids loved the googles.

We did another party 3 weeks after her b-day another year and had an early halloween theme. I went to Christmas Tree shops and bought Halloween themed flashlights for a buck each. That was their "gift". They could use them on Halloween for extra saftey.

One year we did a makeup theme party. Bonnebell's were on sale so I bought one for each girl along with the tiny bottle of nail polish at sally's and pony-0's and cute clips from the dollar store. That was a hit as well and cost me only about $15, but the girls loved those bags. For monts after I'd see those bows in the kids hair. Was funny.

I don't know what I will do this year.

I loved doing goodie bags for my kids birthday parties! I just made sure that the stuff in there was not a bunch of junky, plastic trinkets. It was always stuff that they would use...fruit snacks, bigger bottle of bubbles, pack of Pokeman cards, can of Playdoh, dinosaur, Lisa Frank pencils/stickers, etc. When my son had a pool party, I gave each of the kids a nice beach ball, water gun, and inflatable...I've probably spent alot of money over the years, but the kids always said I made up the best goodie bags. I wasn't trying to outdo anyone else...I just really enjoyed making them up and giving them out. When I was the room mother at school I also did the same thing around holidays for the kids. No, I didn't like it when my kids came home with a bunch of junk that just ended up in the trash. I thought that was a real waste of money. But I also don't think that there is anything wrong with not giving out goody bags. I don't think that there's a real necessity to do so. I wouldn't think anything of it if my kid came home without one. They are older now so they don't get or give them anymore...except my 12 year old son. He recently went to a pool party and the Mom gave each kid a $5 Blockbuster card. I thought that was a bit much...but my son loved it. To each their own... ~Lisa

I hate them. I think they are stupid...sorry. I mean, we now have to bribe children to come to the party by giving THEM something? I think it's nuts to give your guests *presents* for coming. Plus, most of what's in them is either silly made in China plastic stuff that goes right in the trash anyway or it's candy which my kids aren't allowed to have on a daily basis (especially after cake and icecream). So I don't do them. I don't say anything if my kids gets one...they just know to hand it over to me once we get in the car. We've never gotten a goodie bag with anything my kid actually liked (other than candy)

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I would say they are fine for younger kids, as long as the parent can handle the additional expense. Sometimes having a party at a venue is quite expensive, plus buying your own kids a present or two. If you have the $$ and the desire to, I say go ahead.

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We always do them.
The kids love it. I actually let my kids put them together and they really look forward to doing that.
I don't see it as a bribe or anything like that. I think of it as a favor. I tend to have something for guests anytime I plan a party.

I don't think they are a "bribe" at all...I don't know any kids who base their decision on whether they want to go to a party or not on whether or not they are going to get a goody bag...It's a shame that your kid has never gotten anything they like in them...they haven't been to our parties! ~Lisa

I like to make them but do not like to receive them. They are usually just filled with candy and little cheap toys that I step on until I finally throw them away.

In the ones I make I usually put in something that goes with the theme of the party. DS1s party this year was "Survivor" to the kids got to take home team bandannas, pencils, sunglasses and friendship bracelets. A few days after his party we went on the class field trip and it was neat to see the ids wearing the bandannas. DS2s party is going to be "The Amazing Race" so the kids will get fanny packs, a compass, sunglasses, pencils, a small note pad, and maybe a cheap watch if they go on sale.

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In lieu of goody bags, for my DD's birthday party this past December, we gave out "movie buddies" - they were little stuffed doggies that had been marked down in clearance at Old Navy from $8.00 each to $1.00 each. They all held their movie buddies at the movie we took them all to see.

All the kids loved their movie buddies. I couldn't believe what a hit it was.

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"The errors of faith are better than the best thoughts of unbelief." - Thomas Russell

Cool, especially with young kids.

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

Boy, a lot of hate in here. Sad.

My girls are teens so we are over the kiddie birthday parties but goodies bags were always SO much fun to do! My girls actually put them together and we'd theme it to the party.

I had to laugh at someone spending $100 on a party, that is SO cheap.

Party bags or not, we always went all out for birthdays and I enjoyed every moment. We still go "all out" but they are teens now so it's a little different (and more expensive).

Just kick back and enjoy the little things in parenting and don't gripe so much. Kids grow up too fast and you'll be sorry.

We do them all the time. I never spend more than a $1 per bag, and sometimes we have full size candy bars in them!! The ones we give out are mostly candy, we don't put in a lot of the smaller cheapy toys. Sometimes crayons, colored ink pens. I am a bargain shopper so we stock up on clearanced candy and school supplies.

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The trend I've seen here lately is no goody bag or just one item like a ball or bottle of bubbles or candy . I think everybody got a little tired of all the trinkets that end up under foot and then thrown away. I'm guilty of going overboard with the goody bags in the past. I just got caught up in the fun of putting them together. We don't do a big party every year but we will be having two of them this fall and I will have to rethink the goody bag thing. I don't like all the junk that comes home with the kids -- I thing my head will pop off if they bring home one more cute little eraser! I like the idea of just one thing that goes with the party theme.

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"We must love them both--those whose opinions we share and those whose opinions we reject. For both have labored in the search for truth, and both have helped us in the finding of it."
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My girls have so many cute pens, pencils, erasers & notepads. They have given me all their notepads for grocery lists because they don't want them. The pencils & erasers go in the school supply box and the pens are sitting in a coffee mug!

It's funny, my daughter has been entertaining herself the last couple days with balloons & a cheap whistle that she got on Wednesday. (She will be 12 in Sept). I have threatened her that I am going to stuff that whistle down her throat if she doesn't stop blowing it in the house! I also told the mom of the birthday girl that "paybacks are hell" since my daughter's birthday is in 2 months!

My girls have gotten into giving lotions, body washes and stuff like that that now. They no longer like the little nail polishes and lip balms because they want real ones that are good quality.

When they were little, I used to give those Golden books and a tootsie pop.

Even though the adults think that stuff is cheap, the kids seem to like it...at least mine did.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

I agree with you...I think that kids (and the parents too!) like one nice thing that the kid can actually use, rather than a bunch of small, plastic junk! I'm with you on one thing that goes with the party theme...Like when we had a pool party, we gave each kid a water gun and one of those little fabric multi-colored splash balls to use in the pool...Mine are older now (17, 14, and 12) so we don't do goody bags anymore...But we did have a party at CiCi's pizza a year ago when my son was 11...I just gave the kids some coins to play some of the games there...They enjoyed it...I think this subject was brought up once before and the arguments for and against got really heated!...It's funny how some people can be so passionate about something as goody bags...Hee hee! ~Lisa

Personally, I love making up goodie bags for my kids parties. I always shop ahead when I find something for a good price so I always have quite a bit on hand. I try to give 'useful' items rather than a bunch of plastic trinkets. For my DS's 5th birthday, I gave a roll of drawing paper and 4 Crayola markers. It cost me around $5 for 12 of them (thanks to Target clearance).

For my older DS's party, I have Lego Bionicle sets I got for $2.48 each. He's only having a few friends and it is a 'Lego' party, so those will work out perfectly.

Sarah..........mom to Jason & Devin

Many good points here....these are the things to enjoy, not lament.
As for the $100 birthday party, I remember hitting that threshold and thinking it was alot....but as with all things parenting, each step prepares you for the next. I predict $200 parties in your future! LOL

cj/

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Personally I would rather spend more on a party and take the kids somewhere fun that spend a lot on the extras.

DD last party was at Build A Bear and so their goodie bag was the bear and everyone had a lot of fun together.

I love the goggle idea for a swimming party so maybe something along that line, that goes with the party, but having it be one big gift is the way to go?

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The swimming parties we've had were fun...but they get a bit wild at times. We don't have a pool in our yard...just the neighborhood pool. But I made sure that I put a note up on the bulletin board that we were having a party between the hours of 2-4 on a certain weekday afternoon out of courtesy for other people. It wouldn't prevent them from coming to the pool...just some of the older folks wouldn't enjoy being there with ten 11 year olds! Just one MAJOR tip if you have one...DO NOT get leis...Ours was a Hawaiian theme...I bought a bunch of them and the kids ended up pulling them apart...They were all over the place and since I don't have a pool, I didn't think about them possibly getting in and ruining the filter! It really was a mess to try to clean all of that up. ~Lisa

I don't do goodie bags, I dont like giving lots of candy and cheap trinckets. I have done other things for DS b-day parties. One year I got some sand pails and shovels, beach balls, and those water balls. I usually try to do things in a theme (whatever is on sale) or I did back to school supplies. got pencil cases really cheap and bought pencils, erasers smaill notepads.
I only do goodies if I am having a party at home. We just recently had DS party at a laser tag place and I didnt do any goodies. i figured I paid for them to play laser tag, bought the cake and pizza, that was enought!!!

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we do goody bags and I usually put a snack size of potato chips and a cute pencil and a lollypop and I usually put there name on it wishing them happy birthday.

Nope I agree, dont do them. Since when do we have to bribe people to come to a fun party? I dont remember ever getting a goody bag when i was younger.

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I like them for the younger kids, but try to put disposable stuff in them-juice box, candy, etc.-not a lot of the crappy plastic stuff that just goes all over the place. For the older kids, I like to do something else-for a sleepover, I would rather do flashlights and batteries, or do a scavenger hunt and just give a bag of assorted good candy. We did one for Pat's 15th b-day, and it was such a hit. The kids went wild over a bag each of M&M's, Snickers, and Skittles. It probably cost me about $10 to make the goodie bags for 18 kids. The kids enjoy it, and after all the party costs, does it really add up to that much?

I love doing goodie bags. I too dislike the goodie bags the kids get with junk in them. I've been told quite a few times I give the best goodie bags. The cheap back to school supplies are great. Can't beat crayons for .20 a pack and colored pencils for .25 a pack. And the one thing that I always have to put in them are the punching balls, (the kind you blow up and attach the string). For some reason, the kids love them! I also like to look for things on clearance throughout the year.

All the planning for birthday parties can be pretty stressful. I usually spend about $150 for my boys' parties, but this year I gave them an option. They can either have their parties or I would give them the money I would normally spend for their parties. My oldest has opted for the money (he's saving for an XBox 360) while my youngest wants the party. So one less party for me to plan this year. I'll still let my oldest have a sleepover with a few of his friends.

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