Every year my mom wants to make a big deal out of my birthday and really, I couldn't care less! She is coming to visit this weekend and is already nagging me about stuff! I am just happy she and my aunt and cousin are driving 4 hours to visit......I don't want her to bake a cake to bring, I don't want an elaborate gift or party......never do any year!

For my 40th we had a big bbq, but any other year, no big deal to me. I don't even take a day off work.....why, because everyone else I know is working and I would rather not sit home alone all day! We do a family dinner---birthday person picks the restaurant, and a couple presents but that is it. Anyone else like me? I really don't want any birthday fussing!

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"It's not about how much baggage you have, it's about whether or not you can carry your own baggage with grace and dignity."

I am the opposite of you LOL. I was the oldest of four children my next sister being born 11 months after me so I NEVER got a "friend" birthday party and my Mom always said "you're older you understand they're younger". I get downright pouty and babyish when my husband does not make a big deal of my birthday, Valentine's Day, Christmas, etc.
Also I love attention and being the center of it. I want to feel special on my birthday and I want the world to stop LOL!

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

I too wish my family would just *cool it* with the birthday's. It's not just immediate families. We buy cards and gifts for my cousin, her husband and my aunt. It has become the "exchanging of $25 giftcards". I want it to stop. Call and say "hey, happy birthday". That's GREAT! DON'T buy me a giftcard!!! It's frustrating. My aunt is on disability and my cousin's hubby was out of work for awhile and they need their money. Honestly, I don't *need* anything that is going to cost $25...my *needs* are much more money right now. I always feel like crap because we probably the best off money wise and I'm the one who wants to stop it because the other love to give gifts. I am so glad my DH doesn't make a big to do. We go out to dinner or I don't cook...which is nice but I don't need the big blowout...

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

I'm with you. Sometimes it's just nice to relax on your birthday and do absolutely nothing at all. My birthday is on Fourth of July so there's always something going on that day. I love it on one hand and on the other I hate it. My Mom thinks that we always have to get together so she can give me my birthday present. Since it's a holiday, everyone wants to have a BBQ. I think they mean well, but it can be annoying. I'm blessed to have them and that they care. I don't mean to sound ungrateful. I know that someday when she's gone I'll feel so bad that I ever felt this way. I just hate to have to be somewhere when I just want to sleep in, read magazines, and relax on my birthday. ~Lisa

Trust me, when people stop making a big deal about your B-Day you will wish they did.

When someone wants to make you a birthday cake, be grateful and enjoy it.
I've been married 30 yrs and in all that time my mom has never made me a cake. She does other nice things for me but no birthday cake. Of course, if my brother is in town on his birthday, he gets a cake.

I don't like a big to do....just a small family get together is fine with me.

I don't even care much about gifts, just show me some appreciation, and that you KNOW it's my b'day.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I am coming up on the six yr anniversary of losing my mom, so I have a much different perspective. But you have a different situation and are entitled to feel the way you feel.. Just want to encourage you to have a grateful heart about those special people who will drive 4 hours to be with you on your birthday.

I enjoy "doing" birthdays for family and friend. However, don't enjoy it for myself. Probably because never had a birthday party growing up....NEVER. I am a twin, and my parents always said that it was too expensive to give a party for twins (yet our 3 other sibs had parties every year--go figure). Also, presents were NEVER singular...ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS got presents for "both of you"--so we had to share--never got individual gifts. Kind of turns you off to birthdays. But I found out that when I was on my own(left home the very day I turned 18--guess no surprise there) I loved "doing" for my friends, then family and my own kids. Still do, still don't for myself (my sister is the same). I guess it just depends on each individual's own personal growing up experiences

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"Well-Behaved Women SELDOM make history."Laurel Thatcher Ulrich


"Yesterday is but a vision, and tomorrow is only a dream. But today well lived makes every yesterday a dream of happiness, and every tomorrow a dream of hope." Anonymous

"Your candle does not lose it's light by lighting another candle" Generosity

Have the courage to be yourself.

Thanks for all the comments......gave me a good perspective. I guess it just rankles me that "one day" is more special than any other day.......my Mom asked me one time why I dont want a 'special' day and I told her.....she made me feel special EVERY day! I just think it is a conspiracy among retailers, similar to Valentines Day, Mothers Day and Christmas......buy cards, flowers, gifts, whatever as long as you SPEND MONEY! ugh.......just send me an email.

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"It's not about how much baggage you have, it's about whether or not you can carry your own baggage with grace and dignity."