My friend Diane has been divorced for 6 months and it ready to start dating. We were talking and I mentioned, half jokingly, to remember not to put out on the first date. It sparked a conversastion about do those "rules" still exhist? Does that include divorced people with kids who are obviously not too worried about their virtue...do we really care, because it's just sex? Are we gonna grab it when we can?

What is your opinion- I know you have one.


I always had it in the back of my mind during my dating days (13 years ago)...but, hey, there were a couple of times.....and I have no regrets

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Love, J.

Whatever she feels comfortable with . . there are times I have and times I never did!!!

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Laura
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I think the majority of people don't care anymore, especially after a divorce. Personally, it's not something I would do or feel comfortable with. It would make me feel cheap and easy, BUT...that's me and how I was raised. I don't pass judgement on those who feel and/or do differently. I only judge myself and how *I* feel about it personally

If she feels ok doing it and she uses protection, then hey, why not?

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My opinion is that if I were to be dating again I would not be into casual sex. I would want to get to know a person first with the intention of things going further. This is right for me. I am not saying I did not make mistakes when I was younger but right now at my age the person I have become I have no desire to do it with a bunch of strangers or even one stranger (unless it's David Cassidy! LOL)

And I do think men still think of women who sleep around as not having respect for themselves.

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

I think there was a "DRY" spell during the last year of her marriage...she's proabley pretty thirsty!
I feel bad her trying to find someone to WANT to have sex with, I look at the 40'ish guys out there and, well,um...good luck girlfriend!


I'm sure there are some very handsome guys out there...I'm not looking to offend.

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Love, J.

First.. let me say I never have done the casual sex thing. I was with one man so far. *I* can't have sex without love.

I also think men like the chase.. and once a woman in caught.. if she's caught too soon, they lose interest and fast!

I think I have old fashioned thoughts.

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'Vegetarian' is an old Native American word for bad hunter.

OMG! too funny!! I love the way you put that! haha.


I remember my first date with dh. We were both divorced. Our first kiss, he stuck his tongue in my mouth. I backed up, looked at him and said "Excuse me, but don't you know you should never kiss a lady with your tongue during the first kiss?"

He said he knew that was when he wanted to marry me..

But, just to completely confuse the poor man, I then went home with him that night! Guess it was dry for me after my divorce, as well. LOL

I just simply place it where it belongs and tell him "A woman has a right to change her mind"

my belief is people are too casual with sex anymore which in turn helps spreads all the diseases cureable and none but that's me I also dont drink and all that too heheh

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I don't think you have old fashioned thoughts! I agree with this as well.

From someone who is way beyond thirsty, I'm not sure how I'll react when put around that pond again. One never knows, especially when you are practically parched!!!!!!!

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*** Find A Need , Fill A Need ***

I can see it now..

"Grab the LifeJacket's! I'm diving IN!!!!"


" rubber duckey...check
..goggles ....check
...Snorkel...Check"

Things that make you go hmmm.....

My first thought was, "No, don't be a tramp. Hold out a bit." BUT....I have been married for 19 years, and dated DH for two years before that. I am 39 years old. So, I have pretty much been having sex with him for more than half my life, 2-3X a week. That being said, if all of a sudden, he was no longer in the picture (which would make me sad), I don't know how I would feel. Would I not want to "do it" anymore because it's not with him, or would those needs still be there that can only be satisfied by a man? In which case, would I put out on a first date? I would hope not, but I guess if the shoe (ahem) fits, wear it. Great question OP! Oh crap, but just had another thought. DH has been fixed, not me. I already have four kids. That would probably be my luck to get knocked up on a first date. So maybe not. But the thought was fun while it lasted-lol...

Personally for me never , I guess I am old fashioned as well. But again life is too short and if someone else does feel comfortable then so be. Peace. Catherine

I've been single for 6 years now and it's not too nice out there! Not worth the hassle.
I would be very hesitant to test the waters. There are way too many diseases out there. Especially if you have kids-you want to be a good example. You don't want to get hit with a disease, for example herpes, that you can't get rid of. And what about unintended pregnancies? What about emotional entanglements? It's a lot better to take it very slowly and not end up with regrets!

There was a time in my life when I would answer "yes", but now it is for sure "no". Not for me anyway. Not on the first date. At this stage in my life (46), I don't care to have another lover, unless I am in love.

I too hope to never be faced with this decision but for now, I'd say no. To me the emotional entanglement would be something that I'd forego in order to be there for my children ... after the kids are grown and gone, I'd probably still move very slowly -- certainly not on the first date. I sowed my wild oats when I was young and don't feel the desire or need to repeat that.

As I said, I hope to never have to face this decision.

What Cuthie said goes double for me, too!

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"The errors of faith are better than the best thoughts of unbelief." - Thomas Russell

LOL LOL LOL LOL


I would never drink, gulp, sip or lick the water on my first date.....but that has more to do with how I feel and/or perceive my "bathing suit" then anything else. It's time I get a new bathing suit, but plastic surgery is so expensive...that and DH LOVES my bathing suit.....

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Struttin' our stuff for everyone.
We're not here to start no trouble.
We're just here to do the Super Bowl Shuffle.

Love this answer

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someone would have to be really lonely inside or empty to lay down with somebody on the first date if you ask me.

no i wouldnt do it, never have never will. i mean come on! as some have already stated there are many diseases out there and its simply too risky.

from what i been reading around the net you could even possibly be putting yourself at risk by laying down with your own spouse!

ok ok i hear the crowd saying, "oh no, not MY SO" mm hmm

you dont know what people are doing at all times not unless you got a private investigator on their tail constantly or some of those eye spy cameras attached to them!

i have read where people have been married for 10+ years or more and one of them ends up with HIV/AIDS

so yeah im off topic and i dont care this time of night lol. and its not "just sex" because the passion of the moment can be the mistake of a lifetime.

tell your friend to keep her legs closed and her eyes and ears open!

I would.I'm too old to worry about death right now.I'm more worried if I'm ever gonna get laid again before I DIE?

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You're all bunch of floozies! LOL just kidding!

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

OMG! Perfect! You are a riot!

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Love, J.