I was in Lowes yesterday and they had all thier holiday items out. I got really sad. It hit me how many families are going to be hurting this holiday season. Do you think your holidays will be really different this year? Do you guys have any frugal ideas to help people that are having a really hard time?

I don't think *our* holidays will be that much different. We don't put an emphasis on gifts. I already have the holiday spending money set aside and/or spent on gifts. We will probably spend a bit less but nothing that the kids will really notice. I am going to try to get the "gift card exchange" (ie: we draw a name for extended family members and basically, it's a gift card exchange) to $25 from $50 but that's about it

I DO think more people will be going to organizations for help this season. I hope they REALLY crack down on the people who take advantage of this.I found out last year that there were a few families (at least 3 that we found out about) that went to multiple places to get "adopted" for the holidays. So instead of one family adopting them, they got 3 (and each thought they were the only family). These people shouldn't have even qualified to be a part of the program if you ask me. They had a lot more than people I know who donate

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Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

My husband and I are going to do a "used" Christmas. We're getting things from Craigslist, Freecycle, Swaptree, rummage sales, you name it. I went to our library's used book sale a couple weeks ago and got 50 hardback books for $15! I don't think I'll wrap them all though....

There may be an increase in the number of people looking for some help, but I think there will be a decrease in the amount of help available.

Sexysmurf, I am so sorry to hear about those people who abuse the system. On the other hand, you have to wonder why the groups who run these things can't get more organized and set up some kind of cross reference with each other identifying the people that are being helped by each so there is no overlap.

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E. Roosevelt

There won't be any changes as far as gifts go this year, we're really low key on gift giving. There's no extended family in the area anymore so we don't even have a family name exchange to deal with. There are just the five of us-me, mom, dad, sis and bro-in-law. My budget for gifts is about $200.

We might make some changes as far as food is concerned. We usually get a prme rib for Chrismas dinner and do it up with all the trimmings-big baked potatoes w/the works, corn, dinner rolls and bunches of cookies/fudge/pies/etc. The prime might be out this year, but we'll still have something other than a turkey.

Mom usually makes a big 'ol batch of chex party mix but she noticed that the price of a box of Chex was up to $4.09 when she went shopping yesterday so that might be out. I told her not to worry, chex usually go on sale closer to the holidays and I have coupons but she placed it on the "Things that could go" list. I agreed that I'd rather have fudge and cookies instead of chex mix.


On the topic of people abusing charities, I think part of the problem is that many times different members of the family go to different places to get aid. Mom goes to one, auntie goes to another, grandma to another, etc., and they each have a different last name so they end up with all kinds of stuff. There would be no real way the charities could track this sort of thing. How people can rip off charities is beyond me but that is a whole 'nother topic.

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Because these organizations are trying to help people and are operating on good faith. Many don't want to put the families on the spot to prove that they need help. Also, charities are often assisted by volunteers and most try to run a trim operating budget and running extensive cross-checks requires paperwork, phone calls, computers, etc.

I'm not sure that it's against the rules to sign up for help at muliple places. - do recipients have to sign something to that affect? Sure, people should not be greedy, but they are.....seems everyone these days is looking for a hand-out. Besides, for someone willing to cheat and lie to get free holiday handouts, getting around cross-checks would probably be no problem.

I don't think that you should "blame the victim"

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

I don't think our Christmas will be any different from other years. I'm a careful shopper and we don't go crazy with gifts. I don't see that changing this year. I always get lots of things free or close to free for the kids stockings and I have a ton of MyPoints saved up so I'll get some good gift cards to do my shopping with. I don't think the kids ever realize how little we actually spend on them -- they're always very happy with what they get.

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Cecilia

"We must love them both--those whose opinions we share and those whose opinions we reject. For both have labored in the search for truth, and both have helped us in the finding of it."
Saint Thomas Aquinas

Our Christmas will be different this year because we bought the family cruise tickets for Christmas. I am getting a few things like bikinis, dresses beach towels sun tan lotion and beach bags for something to put under the tree.

good luck on that. Is yours "mandatory"??? Ours is $100, and if you "choose" not to participate, you are given the old 20 questions. Definitely not the Holiday Spirit I look for.

Our holidays will be a little scaled back. Of course, I hope for that every year, and it never seems to happen.

For those wanting to scale back, how about a nice cookie tray? Done up real nice on a plate/platter the recipient can reuse.

DVDs and some movie candy

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I think a good place to start scaling back for the holidays is your gift list.

Look at who you give things to and why you give them. Do you give gifts to some people just because you feel obligated to? Do you send gifts to people that you never see/communicate with at any other time? Do you feel obligated to spend a certain $ amount on certain people just because of who they are? Do you resent giving any of the gifts on your list?

If so, then this year would probably be a good time to thin out the list.

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Hopefully for all of us the stores will have wonderful wonderful low to the ground sales and promotions and alot of bigif and if you spend x amount of money you get a g.card. Sadly xmas is still some time away and the stores i go into are very empty truly sad..... Peace. Catherine

The Christmas items in the stores now are mostly decorations and cards. I can understand the cards.

But don't people save their decorations from year to year?
Maybe I am cheap but I save mine to reuse.

I have seen entire trees covered with decorations and lights just tossed. It makes me sick to see it. What a waste. I hope the economy will change some of our wasteful ways.

I can understand having to replace some things as time goes by, especially lights. Most twinkle lights are cheap enough that it isn't worth the bother to try and fix them. Full price twinkle lights are usually $2 or less a string.

But getting rid of everything every year is just insane.

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Some people do themes every year, and deck the halls accordingly. Also, there are some people who are just starting out, etc.

I save my stuff from year to year, and weed out each year, too. I like to add a few new pieces each year, too. Just helps keep it fresh.

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Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I think we will all be fine. All of us on this board are creative and ingenious. The big problem is kids whether you have them or whether you donate to them.

I am worried about people affording to get to their loved ones and the donation boxes going empty.

Remember all the corny things we know to be true about what is important, what to be grateful for, and how good it feels to help others.

We will have an "old fashioned" Christmas with less emphasis on material gifts and more on being together, enjoying some good food and being thankful for what we have in the spirit of the true meaning of the Holiday.

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The political system is broke and it's a joke.

I remember in the early 80's the midwest went into a recession. My dad, my 3 brothers, and 4 sisters (and their spouses) were out of work. Many factories and businesses closed and some tore down their buildings. One Christmas, everyone was out of work except my brother-in-law who worked for the telephone company. We had a simple Christmas. I gave everyone a bag of groceries. Some people made cookies. My kids got presents that I got through refunding. It was a good Christmas because we were all together.

Our Christmas will be a litle different for some of the adults in the family this year, as I gave up a vendor job earlier in the year working for a few different companies that included free fragrances (men's & women's) and makeup when I got write-offs, so people will not be getting their $50 bottles of fragrance and bags of make-up and I can't get Yankee candles anymore real cheap since I don't work for them either anymore, so people won't be getting their Yankee this year. And no one will get their Godiva, one of the other companies I worked for. A couple will get it like my adult DD's, because I still have some stuff and tons of makeup left, but not most of the rest of the adults, oh well, that was a job perk and I quit that job. As far as other things like for my 12 year old, that won't change, she is the only one living at home now so she will get several things off her list.

As far as the charities go and people getting from more than one. I run a food and toy drive for my church, we live in a small town, and I do check with the Police department, which is the only other people that do food baskets at Christmas (the other two church's do the Thanksgiving baskets). And the bank has an Angel Tree. As far as other places like Salvation Army, Toys for Tots, alot of those big organizations won't release information to other organizations because of "confidentiality", so some charities can only do so much checking. The only reason I can check with the Angel Tree is because my friend runs the program there, as far as checking with the Police Department, I know the Police Chief and we live in a small town.

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I'm right there with you. This year we aren't focusing on 'things' but rather time together with family and friends.

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Prayer is the burden of a sigh,
The falling of a tear,
The upward glancing of an eye
When none but God is near."

We donate gifts each year to the needy through those Christmas trees at the mall, where you pick up a paper ornament that has a request to fill. In the past, I've always picked up the most simple requests - someone will be asking for a particular name brand shirt for a 14 year old boy (like Aero or Abercrombie). But I overlook those, and will buy a dozen pair of decent socks for someone who just asked for "new socks," instead.

I don't want to stop doing that little job - it makes me feel good. But I was thinking about doing more of those gifts, and giving a card to family that says "such-and-such a gift was given to a needy person in your name."

Wondering how it will go over. I hope people don't mind!

As far as my kids, they'll be getting less. We'll put more emphasis on our traditions this year, for sure. Last year they got into making a village of "gingerbread houses" (graham crackers on milk cartons), and decorating them. We might go a little crazier with that this year, and emphasize the *togetherness,* like many of you all are doing.

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"The errors of faith are better than the best thoughts of unbelief." - Thomas Russell

I think the reason that people sign up at more than one charity is that while some may give a decent amount of stuff these are people that need help on more than just the holidays and help with food and clothing is needed more than just one day a year. Some people that adopt a family give used toys and games that are ready for the junk heap, while I have seen one child get a bike and the brother or sisters given clothes that don't fit. It hardly seems fair. All families could use a hand up this holiday with food, gas and other expenses and that tells me that the poorer people will need a double hand up.
I worked for years for a company that conducted a major food drive and some of the food that was donated was junk ( outdated and dented cans and even cans that were "popped")while other people donated good quality food.Diapers,diaper wipes, baby food and pet food are also appreciated. Some places do give a gift for mom and dad. Maybe mom and dad have struggled so much just to keep the family together that some little gift would also mean the world to them. Some children are being raised by grandparents and they could use a handup. If you know someone that has no family a small gift would be nice and it could even be a few cookies and a new mug from the dollar store or just a few minutes of our time that we use to make a phone call just to say " hi how are you". There are all kinds of ways to make someones holiday and they don't all cost a fortune.
Now for my pet peeve ,,,there was a lady that donated a self addressedand stamped thank you card listing everything that she donated. When she was informed that all the donations were pooled together and then distributed ( she didn't want that to happen to "her" donation") she requested her donation back so that she could give her stuff all to one family.

Icansavedaily, good point about these people needing more help than ONE agency can give. Our church food drive food baskets typically give a weeks worth of groceries in addition to the holiday meal (my thinking on this is that the kids are out of school, it is the end of the month, anyone on food stamps is probably out of them). I have delivered food baskets to people who have actually have no food, one man started crying when we arrived because he actually had no food (well, he had one bag of rice) to feed his kids that day (single dad). Others haver said if it wasn't for me they wouldn't have had a Christmas dinner, or I don't know how I would have fed my kids over Christmas break. Our county food bank you can only use once every 60 days, that doesn't help a whole lot when you have kids and run low every month. I personally don't have a problem with people getting more than one food basket from different places, but some of the older people at oor church do have a problem with it, so in order to keep peace, I do check and because I want to keep be able to do the food baskets because there is a great need.

As far as the toy drive, you are also correct, people bring in a small thing for one kid from the Dollar Tree, while the older kid may have been bought a couple of outfits from Old Navy, shoes and a toy. We just hand out cards with the kids ages and sizes, some we have wish lists for, some we don't. Some people have more money than others, so we don't have any rules about amounts, I don't ever complain about the type gifts we get, but I do have to take any donated cash or movve gifts around and go "round out" the gifts so that sibs get somewhat the same amount, the gifts have to be brought to me unwrapped. Or you can just bring in any new toy and we will find a kid for it. If I have to spend donated cash then it works out to maybe $10-$15 per kid which isn't a big amount, but better than nothing if put with a couple of donated gifts to someone who is getting very little or nothing under the tree.

PLEASE< PLEASE< PLEASE if you buy something that requires batteries, buy the batteries for it and buy extra batteries for it, these people can't afford food, let alone batteries for a toy. Thanks for listening!

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I didn't intend to "blamd the victom" when I asked about cross referencing who is being helped by various groups in order to cut down on abuse of the system.

I was looking at what I am familiar with--- the limited number of churches in a small town and just assumed that there is some kind of communication among those various groups. I did not look at national charities or large cities.

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Nobody can make you feel inferior without your consent.

E. Roosevelt