Husbands that really do not do alot around the house?? I just realized this weekend that I do everything around here except take out the garbage and cut grass...
Do you divide things to do? How do you compromise?

I personally feel we both work outside the home and we both should always share with the in the home duties as well. Afterall we both live here why not help each other to do the chores and kids included.. just my thoughts... Peace hope things will be better,,, CAtherine

My EX was like that...nothing I did or said helped. His Mom raised him that way...she needed a good smacking. Now he's someone elses problem HAHAHA!

before the split.. I considered bagging up his dirty clothes he strewn about, and hiding them...he'd noticed as soon as he ran out of undie.

I did start not doing certain things for him.... when we first lived together I would make him these wonderful lunches.. sandwiches, chips, pickles, celery stick and something sweet... after begging and crying for him to please not to throw his laundry in the middle of the floor...I stopped the lunches. He still threw his clothes about, but he had to make his own lunches after that.

__________________
Support bacteria -- it's the only culture some people have!

If Vegetarians eat Vegetables. Do Humanitarians eat Humans?

'Vegetarian' is an old Native American word for bad hunter.

Good job Susiecat!
Men...I don't know, it's attitude with them. I'm afraid that your fighting a battle that will only make him more stubborn.
I found that unless it affected my dh directly he didn't notice the chore exhisted. Leave somethings undone that will interfere with his routine...don't talk about it just leave it, maybe he will pick up his slack.
Good Luck

__________________
Love, J.

We pretty much divide it up that I take care of the inside of the house (cleaning, decorating, cooking) and he takes care of everything outside (yard, cars, house upkeep/repairs). This has worked for use and he does help me in the house when life gets busy.

I didn't get from your post that your husband just wouldn't help - if that was the case, I would suggest you speak to him about it. It drives me nuts when something is bothering my dh and he expects me to read his mind.

__________________
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one!
-Harry Chapin

If your husband is like mine he doesn't do it on purpose. Men notice different things than we do and they think differently. Sweetness and appreciation help when something is done whether it's done "right" or "wrong" (my husband puts clean dishes in the wrong place you would think he just moved in).
Most of the time you have to tell them what you want them to do and no it doesn't make you a prostitute if you make "deals" or "trades" with him. It's no different than saying "if you fill up the car with gas I'll pick up your drycleaning".

Men just don't see things the way women do.

__________________
The political system is broke and it's a joke.

I don't have that problem thankfully. I know women who do have the same issue and they use sex as a "reward" for their hubby 's doing stuff. Personally, I think that's horrid. Sex shouldn't be a negotiation tool but that's my opinion obviously. I think you need to make your expectations clear. If you both work outside the home, it should be split equally. I work in the home. Since my schedule is more flexible than his and I am home, I tend to do more housework tasks because I'm here. I usually cook (which I don't mind) but he cleans up. He cooks breakfast on the weekends and he cleans up too.

You just have to let him know your expectations and how you are feeling. He probably thinks he IS doing is share (because men can be blind that way sometimes as can women)

__________________
Proud to say I haven't shopped at a Wal-Mart since Sept 2003

I do most of the yard work, I do most of the mowing. I do almost all of the housework. But...having said that, my dh does most of the cooking. He also makes his own lunch. He works more hours than I do, so I feel I do have more time than he does to take care of the chores. I do wish that he was a little more of a *handy* man. I have a difficult time getting him motivated to do any repairs around the house. He grew up in a house filled with females...so he learned to cook, instead of being taught the traditional male role.

Try a boot to the butt!!!

__________________
Square dancing is friendship set to music!

My EX was like that too. He did absolutely NOTHING at home. I worked full time, took care of our child, kept up the house and the yard, took out garbage, did all the shopping,etc and he barely worked. Just one of the many reasons he is now an EX. I realized after he was gone that without him, I actually had LESS to do, instead of more.

__________________
Mom to 3 - one with 2 legs and 2with 4!

I am lucky then my guy does quite a bit of the housework. Somethings he won't do like cleaning the litter box or vacumming but I can live with that. That being said he does not work outside the house (disabled) and I do. Although I do most of the cooking and dishes on the weekend.

__________________
Laura
Please visit my blog
http://mylifeinlaurasworld.blogspot.com/