My hardest decision was to end my life a few months ago when thing were just so bad and within a week my life changed for the better.

My hardest decision was to leave the hospital when my father was passing away.
I was pregnant, way overdue with ds #2 and scheduled to be induced at a different hospital at 6:00am the next morning. I talked it over with my Mom and she agreed I should get some rest so I left at 11:00pm (he had been unconscious for quite some time). He passed by the time I reached home. I went into labor the next morning without being induced.
That is the day I learned the meaning of "bittersweet".

__________________
There are so many colors in the rainbow
So many colors in the morning sun
So many colors in the flower and I see every one!
-Harry Chapin

My hardest decision was to end my marriage of 23 years

__________________
If you're not living on the edge, you're wasting space.

OMG..I am so sorry!!! (((((HUGS)))))) For what it is worth, I want you to know that I am so thankful and blessed that you chose not to follow through. You have no clue how much you bless those around you.

I, for one, have been a recipient and am thankful for you and am honored to to say you are important to me on mycoupons!!

Icansave,
I am right there with you. When I was going through my divorce many years ago the hardest decision I ever made was to walk through the door of the ER and beg for help. If I didnt get it, I was jumping off the nearest bridge...
Also the best decision....

__________________
Be careful what you wish for.....

My hardest decision was when my mom was at the end of her battle with MS and I had to decide if she would be fed thru a tube or not (she was in a coma by then) She had not put anything in writing, but I knew she did not want that. It was the hardest week of my life. I stayed with her until the end...

My hardest decision of my life was last summer when I had to decide whether to proceed with treatment, or take a chance on a surgery that could either save my life, or kill me on the table.

I ended up doing the surgery, and I'm so glad I did.

__________________
Forgiveness is love in its most noble form. -Anonymous

I am very disturbed by what you said. I don't know what is going on but ending your life is not the way to deal with things. My father committed suicide and I can tell you that EVERY SINGLE PERSON WHO KNOWS YOU OR CAME IN CONTACT WITH YOU THAT LAST FEW WEEKS feels guilty and responsible. Every person who has ever known you will blame themselves. They will wonder what their contribution to your own death they made. They will torture themselves with "if only I had noticed something was wrong and done something about it. If only I would have shown up that day".
And whatever is making you feel this bad will pass. I always take comfort in the fact that a man in a concentration camp found joy in the rain hitting his face. He was happy to be alive each morning and he had hope and faith knowing that the future would be better.

Whatever is disturbing you whatever is hurting you can be dealt with. Please for the love of yourself and everyone who cares or has ever cared about you PLEASE talk to someone!

__________________
The political system is broke and it's a joke.

woah...i hade to read that a few times.

i am sorry you felt like you had to consider that. have you talked to your doctor about how you've been feeling. you shouldn't be doing this on your own.

__________________
I'm the kind of woman when my feet hit the floor in each morning, the devil says "Oh crap, she's up."

Signing the papers that signed my mom up for hospice. That was harder than the suicide attempts and the ending of my marriage. Life is a daily struggle that I survive with the help of people that love me and lots of prayer.

__________________
Laura
Please visit my blog
http://mylifeinlaurasworld.blogspot.com/

Just checking in with the OP - hope you are feeling good and have a good support system in place in case you feel down again in the future...

cj/

__________________
I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

I'm with you-I had to read it 3 or 4 times to see if I read it correctly. I agree with other posters-it's unimaginable how many people suicide affects forever. There are also so many meds out there and so much help available if you just ask for it. No need to feel ashamed. You'd be surprised how many people are on medication! And some of them the least you'd expect!

I guess so far it was the decision to let DS have surgery last year. The doctor told us about a child that died on the table when the surgeon pierced his heart. I was a mess for the next month until the surgery was over.

__________________
Doing the right thing isn't always the same as doing the easy thing.

I've made many hard decisions. And they all seem to be the most difficult for that time...

I am currently struggling with a choice now that will signficantly impact not only my life, but the lives of my children and husband. And given how long I have been dealing with this, I would say it's the hardest decision that I will make.

__________________
Mental that one, I'm telling you. ---Ron Weasley, "Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets"

op hon I am so so sad to read your post. Sweetie please please try to be strong and please do you have type of support system, family friends that you can turn too even perhaps your religion..Please take care of yourself and stay well and keep us posted offering a prayer and so many hugs}}}}}} peace Catherine

Wow , I am so sorry!! I had no idea. I myself am at a point in my life that I would've never dreamed I would be at, but suicide is NEVER the right choice!!!

You said it was several months ago, I'm hoping that you've come a long way. Reach out to people around you, seek medical help. There are so many things that can be done.

We all need to pray for each other. I've read so many times, to be nice to everyone you come into contact with, for they are all fighting their own battles. It's so true. You just never know what people are going thru, or how desperate they feel. It's easy to think that things will never get better. To feel like there's no one to turn to. But that's never true.
Hang in there, we're all in this together!!
Donna

__________________
*** Find A Need , Fill A Need ***

Everything is better now that is why I could post about it. I just had to share.
Marilynk I will pray for you while you make your decission. Good luck my friend.

Icansavedaily - I'm so glad that things are better for you now, and I hope that they continue to improve. Marilynk - I can only imagine how difficult this decision must be for you since it will impact your entire family. Right now, I'm making a difficult decision myself regarding a particular medical treatment for my 22-year old son. This decision will affect him for the rest of his life, and I'm trying to be as well-informed as possible. Intellectually, he's not in the position to make it himself, so it's up to my husband and me. The basic fear is that if something goes wrong, none of us will ever forgive ourselves.

The hardest decision for myself and dh was whether or not to take Fletcher off of life support. I know Fletcher wouldn't have wanted to stay that way, but a selfish part of me didn't want to let go. I still struggle with that, but for the most part I have peace about it.

If you ever feel like taking your own life again.. reach out to someone. Or come back to this thread and read what Annadrose posted, because she nailed it. Even though things may seem hopeless.. you have many many people around you who care and would be devastated to the point that they may consider suicide themselves. Thinking of Abby is what got me through SO SO SO many times...

Oh , Fletchersmom, I was hoping you wouldn't even see this thread.
I think of you often. I truly can't imagine what you go thru everyday. Just know that you have people thinking and praying about you, you are never alone.

You've been thru the unthinkable, and are still trying to help others. Truly an inspiration.

__________________
*** Find A Need , Fill A Need ***

Hardest decision- to tell the doctors to no longer treat my dad knowing it would end his life in the next 12 hours..Even though I knew it was what he would have wanted, it's a very difficult burden to have to bear..Maybe in the future it will get easier.

The hardest decidion for me to make was to not try convince my mom to keep living when she wanted to die. She was 93 years old and had been in the hospital a long time, no chance for recovering and her kidneys had shut down and was going through dialysis 3 times week. She after dicussing with our pastor and doctors asked me if it was ok for her to die that she didn't want to live like this anymore. Doctors agreed to it, pastor agreed to it. The only thing she really wanted was to go home to die, so that's what we did. I took leave from work, my oldest DD took leave from work and we went home with her to her house and took care of her until she died. She died with all of us there, me, and my 3 DD's and had her full memory right up until her last breath. She was in so much pain even with the medication. That was 3 years ago. That was the hardest thing I have ever had to do was not say no, to go along with her wishes, because I really wanted her to still be here. But she got to go home and she died at home, she got to eat all her favorite foods and see her cats and we were all there and that's what she wanted. She was tired, old and sick. That was hard.

__________________
visit my homepage http://penny.mycoupons.com/

Penny..I so understand what you went thru. I watched my mom battle with MS for over 20 years. She finally reached a point at which she just didn't want to fight anymore. It was so difficult, but I knew that she had finally had enough. I think one of the things that made it so difficult is that she was only 59, and had spent so much of her short life having to battle her illness. Although I knew that she didn't want to live anymore, I still had to make some very difficult decisions when she slipped into a coma. Its something I would never wish on anyone...

Fletchetsmom - my heart breaks for you. In your greif you were unselfish enough to share your story in the hopes of helping others. You are an inspiration. My thoughts and prayers go out to you.