So, I had surgery on January 22nd. Maybe you guys remember me wigging out over worry about the anesthesia? Well, I didn't have any problems waking up during the surgery this time, so that was great. But the surgery was much more extensive then we originally thought I'd have to have. 24 years ago, I was a gymnast and tore my ACL during a vault. I had to have open knee surgery, and have had problems with it since November when I re-injured my knee going up the stairs.

Anyway...there was much more damage to the knee than the MRI showed, and here, 3 1/2 weeks later, I'm still on crutches, still can't drive, still not able to work (my boss doesn't want me to return to work on pain meds) and still in pain. I'm in physical therapy with people who've had their knee replaced with an artificial knee, and they seem to be getting along SO much better than I am. It's incredibly frustrating. My knee still looks like I'm carrying around a grapefruit, my surgeon and the physical therapist say that because what had to be done, my pain levels & swelling levels are well within the norm, but I can't tell you how sick to death I am over being on crutches and not even being able to carry a dinner plate to the table! I always wanted to take some time off work, but NOT LIKE THIS! & I HATE feeling sorry for myself because I know it could be much worse (at least eventually I'll get better, you know??). Ever wish you could wrinkle your nose and have it be a month or two down the road?

I understand. I had knee surgery on 6 January to realign my kneecap. I was in a full leg brace for a week, unable to bend my knee. It was incredibly frustrating to me to have my mobility so restricted and, especially, to get so tired so quickly. I was also frustrated as my surgeon thought this was going to be an meniscus issue with the small possibility of something more. Turned out it was the something more. So I wasn't expecting nor prepared for what I ended up with.
But, hang in there. It will get better. Sometimes it just takes time.

I'm continuing to make progress but I still have to wear a brace (fortunately it's a flexible one and I talked them into taking the hinges out about two weeks ago). I'm very restricted to what I can do in terms of cardio work at the gym (which frustrates me to no end), I can't comfortably sit for long periods without my leg propped up, can't sit with my legs crossed. Getting up from sitting/laying on the floor is still a challenge. I'm doing PT twice a week (at no small cost, even with the insurance) and have an additional 45+ minutes of exercises that I have to do at home every day. It's frustrating, sometimes painful, time consuming, costly and a whole lot of not fun.

I think the key to recovery, aside from doing everything your docs and therapists tell you, is to keep an eye on the end goal (hopefully pain free full mobility), look forward to the next milestone and celebrate the little improvements as you're "hobbling towards normalcy". When I was able to take the stairs up to work, I celebrated. When I could take them up and down (since it's all about bending with me, down is harder) I celebrated more. These are little things, but reminding myself that they're all little steps towards my complete recovery is what keeps me going. I think another key is to not measure your progress against other people. If you're doing what you're supposed to be doing, you can't do anything more. You can't measure yourself against others in PT (who are most likely in different situations). Your body's going to heal at the rate at which it's going to heal. When you're frustrated, talk to your PT or your doc. Tell them what you're dealing with. Ask them if there's anything more you can be doing. Ask them if there's a way you can do things differently to help you get along. If there's an OT in your PT's practice, maybe talk to him or her about ways that you can make living with what you're living with a little easier (that's what OTs do, help you live with what you've got. PTs help you get back to where you were.)
It'll get better, it's just gonna take some time.

Whine away -- you're entitled to vent every now and then. I'm glad the surgery went well. I remember how worried you were about the anesthesia. Have your PT or surgeon given you an idea of when you'll start to feel better? Sending healing, happy vibes your way!

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Cecilia

"We must love them both--those whose opinions we share and those whose opinions we reject. For both have labored in the search for truth, and both have helped us in the finding of it."
Saint Thomas Aquinas

Thanks, guys. My surgeon had to repair both meniscus (meniscii??) because both were torn, repair the stretched ACL and tack it back where it should be, grind down the bones for a smooth rotation, and remove lots and lots of tiny pieces of cartilage. The surgeon and the PT folks are telling me that I'll be significantly better in about six weeks. Hopefully, I can drive in about three more weeks, though.

I always thought it would be so cool to be able to stay home all day, play on the computer, read, watch movies, etc...Yeah, right. There's only so much tv watching someone can do. If I could just flippin' WALK can you imagine how clean my house could be?? As it is, I have a dog dying from lymphoma who won't leave my side, and he's the only company I have at all during the day. It's a pain in the butt to have to ask friends to take me back and forth to PT (I live on a small island and there's no public transportation here), and I HATE being dependent. I think it boils down to being lonely, too.

Oh my gosh, feel free to whine away. Crutches are awful!

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Nicole

It takes time. You will feel better. I had three surgeries back-to-back last year (around this time) and was quite miserable for a few months. Slowly, but surely, the pain went away and I got back to normal. A year later, I can remember that it was horrible, but can't really put myself back there. I'm back to me. Just keep the faith and know it will pass! But, vent away!!! It's awful when you're in the middle of it!!

Kim

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Kim

Very complicated, wide ranging knee surgery you have had. You are not the same person you were 24 yrs ago when you had the original knee surgery. My DH had his ACL reconstructed about 15 months ago. He was dissapointed that he didn't rebound as quickly as all the high school friends of my DD who had this done. He was being a little unrealistic. He was also a non-believer in physical therapy, but he did it religiously. He got very depressed about his limitations and being out of work. He felt pain and little progress for a long time. Dr's and therapist assured him he was progressing well, but he didn't believe it.Then, almost suddenly, he noticed a definite improvement in mobility and pain level. He made a great recovery, just not on his timetable. He was out of work almost 10 months. He is now able to ski (gently) on his knee.
So be patient. Do what you can, and try to extend that when you are able. Follow all Dr's and therapy instructions.Do all your exercises religiously. You will get better!

I hope you feel better soon!

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