My kids were on a fall soccer team ( they're in kindergarten and first grade) and a friend just got an email about a soccer party this coming Saturday at the field to hand out shirts and have a bbq, etc. We didn't get an email and there were at least 4 other families out of maybe 15 that weren't on the list.

I typed a letter back to the lady running it, but I sound like a jerk and I didn't send it. I was going to ask her if it was just for people that volunteered or is it for all of the kids because she was missing quite a few people from her list.

It's such short notice that we can't be there and 3 of the other families won't make it either, so is there even a point in asking? It should have been announced to everyone and in enough time to make plans, not 3 days before. And ALL of the children who participated should be invited?

Would you email her or just leave it alone? I don't want to look like a jerk.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

I think I would send her an e-mail. Just something short like:

There seems to be some confusion about the upcoming soccer bb-q. Is it intended for just the volunteers or for the whole team?

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I would probably send a note/email/text..whatever you are comfy with stating what was said above.

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Yep. I'd check into it. We're all human. It might have been an oversight on her part. If so, she'll appreciate the heads up.

My guess is it was an accident and she meant to send it to everyone. I have never heard of not inviting the entire team. Did you have to pay a fee upfront?Usually that includes trophies, party, gift for coach etc...

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I'd check into it, but definitely from the point-of-view of thinking it was an error/oversight/accident. I can't imagine a team event not meant to be for the whole team.

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

Give her the benefit of a doubt. She maybe screwed up your email addy. It happens.

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OK, I just said:

Hi, I was wondering if this is for all of the kids, or just those whose parents helped out?

We'll see what I get back. We've had kids left out of things before and I know how much it hurts, but I thought it looked bad if I make a stink and didn't go anyway?

Things are very "clicky" and the email was a classic example of that, it only went to certain people. Someone forwarded it to me, which is the only reason I know about it.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

A lot of families were left off, 2 of those families had 3 kids who were on teams and they never got an email or call, so it isn't just me.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

I would give her the benefit of the doubt, too.

As a soccer mom for 11 years and a team manager, it is so easy to have names left off the email list. It doesn't matter how many kids there are, the email list is a pain to double check. (you know you're checking emails, not counting heads).

Hopefully it was just an oversight on her part.

Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

No, I don't think she would intentionally leave any kids out, but there were better ways to get in touch with everyone. She has a phone list, there's an announcement board in town for things like this and it wasn't on there, as well as a website that it could have been put on.

I;m sure there are families that I don't know that weren't included as well, I just knew who I stood with every weekend and they weren't on there. There were 2 other groups of teams after me that I didn't even see, so who knows how many people don't know.

We'll wait and see if she emails back.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

She sounds like a real loser who really shouldn't be volunteering with kids sports programs if she is going to act all cliquish.

Just kidding, of course, but I thought I would throw it out there to see how it looks when written down.

cj/

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I was walking home one night and a guy hammering on a roof called me a paranoid little weirdo. In morse code. -Emo Phillips

Did she respond?


Lisa

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"It's not having what you want,
It's wanting what you've got"

I had just about given up hope and her email came through tonight.

She said she'd reschedule the party!!

I am so glad, but I hope I didn't make her or the parents that were planning on coming tomorrow mad.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

A soccer party is for everyone to attend, not just who volunteeted etc. I would be terribly upset if we were left out. Its basically a team sport. You did the right thing by asking. And don't feel bad about others feeling unhappy about day change. They would have been in the same boat if missed out.

Pretty funny but kind of rude LOL. Too bad people can't just say what they think right? On the other hand I am glad that you wrote her and that she is changing the date and inviting all.

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Laura
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Well, I guess I read it wrong, today I heard it was cancelled and if we want our shirts we have to call her and go get them now. So she rescheduled it all right, right off the calender.

I wasn't even going and my kids didn't know anything about the party so I wasn't so worried about me, but there are older kids, 5th and 6th grade who weren't invited and they would know about it. I'm sure she's not happy with me.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

Was this a beginning of the soccer season or the end of the season where you live? Did you put any money towards a party or trophies and things like that? Is she using the team's money to throw a "quiet" party?

I guess what is confusing to me is the fact that you are getting shirts. We always got our shirts at the beginning of the season.

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Donna

It was fall soccer, it ended in November! They kept telling us the shirts were coming from day 1 and we never got them, we were supposed to have them for the games. I have no idea what happened.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

Why did she cancel it?

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I'm just assuming it's because it took her this long to pull it together and then she forgot so many that she's just giving up on it. It has been 5 months since they played.

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"A true friend is someone who thinks that you are a good egg even though he knows that you are slightly cracked." ~ Bernard Meltzer

That still kinda sucks.

I probably would have spoken up too. No one should be left out of a TEAM sport function.

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