This week is "Teacher Appreciation Week". First off, we like our teachers and I always do something nice without being prompted. It's not always during "teacher appreciation week" but always at holidays and a nice something at end of the year.

I have a 2nd and 4th grader. In addition to their own teacher, the homeroom class adopts a 2nd teacher who doesn't have a homeroom class (librarian, art teachers, music, etc). So, we have 2 teachers per class we are "appreciating". Here is my frustration:

For each teacher we are being asked:
1) to give $5-$10 for each teacher to buy them gift cards

2) Monday we bring flowers for each teacher to be put in a vase (min cost $9 for a small bouquet to separate between both kids. We do not have flowers to cut out of our yard)

3) On Tues we are supposed to bring in a card (no problem with this one)

3)On Wed we are supposed to bake goodies for each teacher and write a recipe card out

4) On Thursday, we are supposed to bring in a gift that the teacher will like (suggestions were coffee, lattes, scrapbooking stuff, books, etc)

I just think that's a little much. In fact, I've had a class parent ask me for more than the $10 I sent in because not enough kids sent in money. Our school is big on "everyone belongs" but how can everyone belong with this list of stuff per kid to do? Not everyone can buy flowers and bake cookies and donate money.

Then I get an email from 4th grade class mom saying that at an author reading the kids are doing next week, they need parents to donate food and drinks. They need food/drinks/tableware for 300 people minimum and would I donate something that would serve at least 25 people. Uh, this is for a 20 min. thing. I DO NOT expect to be served food and drinks for 20 minutes right after dinnertime. Would you? I think it's WAY over the top. I've sent in my $$$ and feel that the cash and the card is enough. To me, if it's orchestrated like this, there really isn't any *real* appreciation. It's forced. I'm a lot more frustrated than when I usually just do something I want to do. Am I out of line? This is new this year (at least to me). I have no problem saying 'no' but am I wrong to do so in this situation?

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I am a teacher and I can say I think it gets out of hand sometimes. I think you could pick one thing to do and that is plenty. I teach in a private school now and our parents get together to give us a gift on teacher appreciation week(usually an album with kids in it and a $10-20 GC), we get one flower from each child to make a pretty bouquet on our birthday, a Christmas gift from the class, and an end of the year gift from the class. What in the world is a teacher supposed to do with 20 or more different baked goods? I would end up throwing most of it in the trash. I like the recipe card idea though. I would rather have a sincere thank you than have things given to me that are not from the heart and done because the family felt pressured to!

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I think you are being asked to do too much. I have been a room parent many times and never asked for anything for teacher appreciation week. I let the parents decide on their own if they wanted to do something. An idea that one room parent did one year is one day 1 flower per child. The next day one can of the teachers favorite soda per child. I think the next day was a card per student, and then next may have been a candy bar. I think everything probably cost less then $3 per child. Why is she asking on day 1 for money for gift cards, and then day 4 a gift for the teacher. I think your room parent has gone overboard. And what is the teacher going to do with all of day 3's baked goods? Even if the kids are going to eat it too it will be way to much. Just do what you can, and don't feel bad about what you can't do.

Off topic but last week was our teacher/staff appreciation week. The PTA did something everyday for us. (I'm staff, a lunch time campus aide). Day one muffins, day two popcorn, day three bagles, day four snacks, and day five was a lunch. It was a lot of fun. The parents were not asked to bring anything for this.

Mine are out of elementary school now, so I don't have to deal with it anymore. Yours is a little overboard IMO. We did similar things. I just bought a carnation at the grocery store for I think $3 - the point was that everyone brought a flower to put together in a bouquet. We also did the can of her favorite pop and the candy bar. Once one room mom did the alphabet - every kid was assigned a letter and you had to bring something in that started with that letter - that was pretty cool. The kids always made a card on one day. They seemed to enjoy that. Ours was never too bad that I recall. They never asked us to send more because someone else didn't. What they would request was to send it what you wanted between $3-$5 or some amount - giving you a range, then they bought what they had money for (not pick an amount and expect everyone to get there).

Lisa

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WOW!!! That is a bit much, I agree. EVERY parent is supposed to send in cookies and a recipe?? That seems like a lot of cookies, and a lot of them will be wasted.

We're not even doing Teacher Appreciation, that I know of. Is this thru your PTA/PTO??

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Wowza, that's out of hand! At our school, each day is dedicated to a different group...tomorrow is teachers, then cafeteria workers, specials (art, music, PE) teachers and then support staff on Friday. It's just meant to be a time for saying thank you with a child-made card, not a week-long giftfest. I think you should say something at the next PTO meeting.

Maureen

I'm not sure if it's PTO or what. I just know I got the same form letter from each room parent. I can't attend PTO meetings as they conflict with our schedule. I AM going to ask the school secretary about to whom I can write a letter to. I just think it's nuts. Ideally each teacher would get a $50 GC, a bouquet of flowers, a bunch of baked goodies and recipes and then a separate individual gift from each child.

Thanks for the comments. It's nice to know I wasn't getting all worked up over nothing. I don't mind doing thank you's...in fact, I do them often. I just do not like the way this one is done. Plus, it's like the 4th one this year. We have a note around the holidays to "remind" us to thank our teacher, this one and then 2 conferences (that I remember), we were asked to bring in food for breakfast, lunch, and dinner on conference days (no school for kids just conferences for teachers). I just didn't remember this kind of stuff when I was a kid

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hmmm....
Our schools do either a luncheon or breakfast for the teachers on ONE day.
They ask parents to volunteer either time to monitor the lunch room/playground during that time so the teachers can have a break and eat, and to either make or bring a specific type of item.

I have NO PROBLEM w/ donating my cooking--as that is something that I love to do, so it's never been a hardship for us.

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Madness. What if every profession went this route. Trashmen appreciation day. Insurance agents appreciation day. Grocery store clerk appreciation day. Good grief.

Who ever came up with this bright idea is out of touch with reality. To some families right now, who aren't making a teacher's salary, that money and/or time would really hurt.

Thank goodness my kids are out of school. Things like this never happened when they attended.

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I think it's a bit overboard, as well. We are celebrating teacher appreciation at our school, too. I have a 4th grader and we were sent home a very nice note with ideas and favorites. It is up to you whether you want to participate, but we always do. I do like that they list the teachers' favorite things. DS has 3 teachers, so it can add up, though. This is what they've suggested:

Monday - a favorite drink
Tuesday - a snack
Wednesday - something relaxing like bubble bath, lotion, a candle
Thursday - a flower to add to the class bouquet
Friday - they asked us to send $1-2 dollars to buy a gift card. I did send $5, but I only have 1 child and I REALLY like his teacher. Plus, we haven't had great participation this year.

They are also catering a lunch on Friday and have asked PTA members to bring a dessert. I will take a fruit tray as my contribution.

I do feel like our things are reasonable, but it is tough with 3 teachers. I wouldn't be pleased, however, with the request to feed 25 people, contribute $10, etc.

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Kim

I think they are asking too much of you. That's way overboard. Our PTO organizes the week and this is what we are doing:

We sent home a sheet of paper last week and asked the kids to make a card for their teacher. We hung them around the classroom doors Friday after school so that the teachers would see them when they arrived today.

Tuesday: bagels (paid for by PTO)
Wed.: chilli and cornbread -- volunteers are cooking
Thursday: desserts -- volunteers are baking
Friday: small gift -- cute sticky notes (paid for by PTO)

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I'm confused as to why every kid in a classroom would bring in flowers - that could be a lot of flowers for every teacher!

cj/

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I think it is 1 single flower per child.

Your school does this for a whole week !! wowzaa.. This is the 1st year the school has not requested anything from the parents. I'm pretty sure its because of everything they have requested of them from Nov- Feb . I can't get over the flowers and bake goods .. If the class has 30 students and they bake a dozen cookies thats 360 cookies !. he he hope the teachers has plenty of milk at home .LOL.

I know when my DD or DS has a classroom party I will send in 2 dozen cookies as requested by the teach and I always get back no less than 10 cookies that day. ( and I thought kids loved CC cookies ) But it also might be they have other stuff at the party too, but still 360 cookies WOW. On top of a card, flowers and gift cards.. Seems to be asking too much IMHO ..

Yes, the room mom typically provides a vase and each kid is asked to bring in A flower. Some people bring more, but the idea is with 1 flower per kid, with 20-25 kids, it makes a nice bouquet.

Lisa

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Right. In our case it's at least 2 flowers each child because we have an "adopted" teacher as well. So, I need 4 flowers for 2 kids. I say "at least" 2 flowers because (as I've been told), participation is not good and the "extras" you bring can be given to another child to put in the arrangement so "no one is left out". The cost for 4 single flowers is as much as a small bouquet (since singles are $2 each)

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Have you checked at locate grocery stores to see if they have any marked down flowers to cut the cost ... I know you don't shop at wally world( God I wish I had your control on that ! ).. But about every other day Wal-mart has theirs marked down 50% off since it's fresh cut flowers..

we get the auto calls at home from the principle about various activties, the end of the call was about teacher day but no mention of having to do anything. i think if you had a great teacher that year and want to do it then send something, bad teacher then dont, not cause your requested to

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I work at a school and that does sound a bit excessive. We're having a breakfast tomorrow (courtesy of the principal) and the PTA is putting on lunch for us on Friday. That's plenty!

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Well this is a tough one. In these times it's hard for people to give. I would ask you to remember that usually more is asked for than is actually expected i. e. "if we ask for everything we will at least get something".
I think that the parents who do and who give are stuck with picking up the slack for those who do not.

We have to find a balance between keeping our time and money manageable and ensuring that the children still have valuable experiences in school that keep it interesting and engaging. It would be nice to think we could focus on the Three Rs but in reality if that was the case most kids would lose interest way before high school.

I hope you can choose what is meaningful to you and let go of any guilt or anything like that.


Check Costco for flowers!

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I think that's a bit over the top. For heaven's sake! What is a teacher going to do with all those baked goods? I know when I was teaching, we were all always trying to lose weight.

I think a card made by the student and maybe a flower is nice. Just do what you can and don't feel bad about it. The cards are really always the best anyway.

My kids have always made a card in the past and have been asked to bring a flower once (we have lots in our yard so that was never a big deal). The PTO usually does a brunch and asks for things for that. . .sometimes I have brought a fruit tray or muffins, but other times I haven't. . .not a big deal, do what you can.

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I spoke too soon........ got a letter today asking for 3 parents to send in food for a breakfast and luncheon for the teachers and staff. Our teacher has asked that we not ask anyone in the class, she says we have truly done enough. Sounds good to me ;-)

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That's ridiculous. I hate it when other people try to spend my money. I think having a sign up sheet would be nice...asking each parent to sign up to provide something once during the week. Honestly, some people couldn't even swing signing up for one day, let alone being expected to participate every day. It puts you on the spot and is very uncomfortable.

OP that request is waaaay overkill...I would contribute but might not send exactly what they requested each day I mean send stuff for 5 days every day? That's too much. I also think they are padding the request to help make up for the parents who don't send stuff in.

They stopped doing this at my daughters school 2 years ago but up until then it was the same principle. Certain days were certain items and they asked for donations to buy a giftcard. Times are getting tougher so IMO they really shouldn't ask(kind of pressures people into thinking they HAVE to participate). My daughter does Christmas gift for teacher and will get her something either by Friday of this week or on last day of school to show our appreciation.

As far as I know, they aren't doing anything for the teachers at the school I sub at. I think last year I saw a vase with flowers and a card on the table in the teachers lounge, but other than that....nothing special is done.

I think that is alittle over the top.
Our principal, in her weekly e-newsletter advised us that it is teacher appreciation week and asked us, if we were so inclined, to write a letter to a favorite teacher in our lives and suggested our child do the same. Also the Parent Teacher Group has a catered lunch for teachers this week paid for with fundraising proceeds. I think this is a classy way to handle it.

Think I also spoke too soon as well. DS just handed me a flier about Teacher Appreciation Week.

It reads
In honor of our teachers during Teacher Appreciation Week, we would like our students to have the opportunity to give something to their teacher. here is a list of different ideas that your child could bring for their teacher.

Mon - Materials for school

Tue - Something sweet

Wed - Flowers

Thur - Card

Fri - Gift of your choice

Now have a question, This is the 1st time EVER anything like this has been sent home form all 4 schools my children are attending. Now does this mean I need to send in a gift each day ? Or pick a day to send a gift ?. All the schools have ever asked for is money usually 10.00..
TIA

I would pick one day, or however many you wish, and do the "activity" for that day. I don't know what they are asking for....but, I am leaning towards having you bring something every day.

As stated in my earlier post, I am not asking any of our parents to send something for the breakfast/luncheon. We were just asked to cough up $$ for a field trip, ice cream party, and end of year teacher gift. I hate asking people to send in money every time you turn around.

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Oh man, I'm torn on this 1

I can handle the flowers, sweet and card. But I'm a little torn on the gift card and school supplies. I always send a nice gift at the end of the year for the teachers plus 3 times a year I send in school supplies for the whole classroom. It's not that I don't want to send in the items, I just feel since I already send school supplies for DS and my DD classrooms I really don't want to do this again so soon, plus we only have 15 days left before schools out. In Aug I'll send as I have always done for the whole classrooms for 3 of the 4, (4th child is in middle school ). The gift card I had plan to give to the teacher anyway ( 15 days from now ). ACK I wish they would have stated what they wanted the parents to do, everyday or just 1 or 2 days.

Sub teacher I know was ranting the other night about how expensive candy and things are to give as rewards to kids. I mentioned dollar tree had packages of reward stickers like 528 to a package. That was all we got for a reward not all this other stuff and we was happy for the gold star or sticker. She told me it wasnt a reward it was just a sticker. ??

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In my opinion, they are asking you to do each day....just as ours are. They are hoping most do a few of the days to make up for those who do none.

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I think its a bit much, then again our school doesn't even have room mothers I have asked about it more than once over the last 6 years. Heck we're lucky to have more than 5 people at the PTA meetings other than the officers, the same people volunteer for EVERYTHING. Then again our school is 85% on free or reduced lunch, yet most of the parents drive expensive cars but I wont go there.

I think one thing per teacher as a group classroom effort is more than enough, times are tough for everyone now and many parents are losing their jobs and many teachers jobs are guaranteed.

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I don't have kids but I'm shocked at what the schools are asking for! Some of that stuff is way out of line IMHO.

I'm no party/gift giving genius, but what about asking each kid to bring in $1-$3 dollars then using that $ to buy a gift card for the teacher and then making one big card from the whole class? Assuming the average class size is 20-25 kids, that would provide enough to get a decent gift card, it's just supposed to be a token of appreciation, not a Price is Right Showcase, lol!

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I don't think that it is the school but the room parent that is doing this. My children have had room parents that always went way overboard. Once one called and said that our class was having a feast for Thanksgiving. Would I like to bring a ham or dessert. Can you guess what I brought. lol